A confession to make!

[CiaoBitchezz!]

So I have been "one of those" before who would never ever consider being personally involved with a guy I met in this. However, you never know who that person is who walks into your life at the right moment, leaving you totally blown away.

About a year ago, after taking a break, I met up with a guy who was so apprehensive to give me screening info. So he walked in, and the tension was so thick in the room. It was a mix of animosity and sexual attraction. So I massaged him, breaking out in a dripping wet sweat, then sent him home.

Next meeting, said fuck the massage, and had the BEST SEX EVER! You know, the kind that leaves you weak, unable to talk or walk.

Over the course of the last year, we grew as friends, occasional sex when I was in town. He travels at times too and we would just meet up.

It has grown into more, and we talked about how this is totally not what we set out for. Our lives are both complicated with family obligations on each side, careers, etc. He is separated and undecided about divorce and I am undecided about going forward with anything in the form of commitment with anyone at the moment. But I feel what I feel.

Bottomline, you cant help who you fall for. I never thought I would have an open heart to a man I met who paid me for an erotic massage, especially one that is still married. I do have an issue with that too, but I forget about it when we are together. It is cheating and I never want her to find out as I want nothing to do with her being hurt.

We have truly become BEST FRIENDS, and if that is all I ever get out of it then Im ok.

Ive seen many threads where the guys fall in love and other men warn them about the providers not stopping, being players, etc. That may be true, but I will say that after we made that connection I did not accept money from him and would never ask him for anything.

See guys, some of us are real, lol, and want true love, to love and be loved.

[acp5762]

Originally Posted by CiaoBitchezz!

So I have been "one of those" before who would never ever consider being personally involved with a guy I met in this. However, you never know who that person is who walks into your life at the right moment, leaving you totally blown away.

About a year ago, after taking a break, I met up with a guy who was so apprehensive to give me screening info. So he walked in, and the tension was so thick in the room. It was a mix of animosity and sexual attraction. So I massaged him, breaking out in a dripping wet sweat, then sent him home.

Next meeting, said fuck the massage, and had the BEST SEX EVER! You know, the kind that leaves you weak, unable to talk or walk.

Over the course of the last year, we grew as friends, occasional sex when I was in town. He travels at times too and we would just meet up.

It has grown into more, and we talked about how this is totally not what we set out for. Our lives are both complicated with family obligations on each side, careers, etc. He is separated and undecided about divorce and I am undecided about going forward with anything in the form of commitment with anyone at the moment. But I feel what I feel.

Bottomline, you cant help who you fall for. I never thought I would have an open heart to a man I met who paid me for an erotic massage, especially one that is still married. I do have an issue with that too, but I forget about it when we are together. It is cheating and I never want her to find out as I want nothing to do with her being hurt.

We have truly become BEST FRIENDS, and if that is all I ever get out of it then Im ok.

Ive seen many threads where the guys fall in love and other men warn them about the providers not stopping, being players, etc. That may be true, but I will say that after we made that connection I did not accept money from him and would never ask him for anything.

See guys, some of us are real, lol, and want true love, to love and be loved.

Well don't let anyone fool ya. A recent poll here showed that the most important thing was a GFE type of provider.

[Pink Floyd]

If the truth be known, anyone one of us would abandon the Hobby if we really fell in love. You cannot eliminate the human side of this. Of all the women I have met there are probably 3 that could make me bite if they wanted to, but I consider myself as a 3 time loser with 3 divorces.

[burkalini]

Originally Posted by CiaoBitchezz!

So I have been "one of those" before who would never ever consider being personally involved with a guy I met in this. However, you never know who that person is who walks into your life at the right moment, leaving you totally blown away.

About a year ago, after taking a break, I met up with a guy who was so apprehensive to give me screening info. So he walked in, and the tension was so thick in the room. It was a mix of animosity and sexual attraction. So I massaged him, breaking out in a dripping wet sweat, then sent him home.

Next meeting, said fuck the massage, and had the BEST SEX EVER! You know, the kind that leaves you weak, unable to talk or walk.

Over the course of the last year, we grew as friends, occasional sex when I was in town. He travels at times too and we would just meet up.

It has grown into more, and we talked about how this is totally not what we set out for. Our lives are both complicated with family obligations on each side, careers, etc. He is separated and undecided about divorce and I am undecided about going forward with anything in the form of commitment with anyone at the moment. But I feel what I feel.

Bottomline, you cant help who you fall for. I never thought I would have an open heart to a man I met who paid me for an erotic massage, especially one that is still married. I do have an issue with that too, but I forget about it when we are together. It is cheating and I never want her to find out as I want nothing to do with her being hurt.

We have truly become BEST FRIENDS, and if that is all I ever get out of it then Im ok.

Ive seen many threads where the guys fall in love and other men warn them about the providers not stopping, being players, etc. That may be true, but I will say that after we made that connection I did not accept money from him and would never ask him for anything.

See guys, some of us are real, lol, and want true love, to love and be loved.

I met a provider about 2 years ago. We clicked immediately. She would come over for an hour and spend 4 or five hours with me. Money was never an issue with her. I gave her money for about 2 mos. One time she came over and asked me if she could spend the night. That was basically it. We spent all the time together after that. No money was ever talked about again. She told me she was falling in love with me and wanted to quit the hobby. I can say I truly fell for this girl. We spent a great year together after that and even talked about making it legal. I asked if she ever wanted to go back in the hobby again and she said she couldn't even think about it anymore. I asked her many times if she needed any money and she always said no. It just didn't sit right with me as she was unemployed. Well yep you guessed it she was still seeing some old clients utr. When I asked her why she said she just got so used to it that quitting abruptly was hard for her so she only saw a couple of clients a month. Well honesty is very important to me so I broke up with her. She called me for mos after that but it was just too hard for me to see her anymore. I hate to say it but I really got my guts torn out some. I know everything is great for you now with this guy but I guess the deck is stacked against you. I won't say it can't work but I will say it's not likely. Just my opinion which doesn't mean shit.

[Still Looking]

Originally Posted by burkalini

I met a provider about 2 years ago. We clicked immediately. She would come over for an hour and spend 4 or five hours with me. Money was never an issue with her. I gave her money for about 2 mos. One time she came over and asked me if she could spend the night. That was basically it. We spent all the time together after that. No money was ever talked about again. She told me she was falling in love with me and wanted to quit the hobby. I can say I truly fell for this girl. We spent a great year together after that and even talked about making it legal. I asked if she ever wanted to go back in the hobby again and she said she couldn't even think about it anymore. I asked her many times if she needed any money and she always said no. It just didn't sit right with me as she was unemployed. Well yep you guessed it she was still seeing some old clients utr. When I asked her why she said she just got so used to it that quitting abruptly was hard for her so she only saw a couple of clients a month. Well honesty is very important to me so I broke up with her. She called me for mos after that but it was just too hard for me to see her anymore. I hate to say it but I really got my guts torn out some. I know everything is great for you now with this guy but I guess the deck is stacked against you. I won't say it can't work but I will say it's not likely. Just my opinion which doesn't mean shit.

Burk,

She was unemployed and didn't need money? Was that NOT a red flag? Personally, in real life you’re all in or not! If NOT it never works! As you probably read I met a gal who was a provider 5 years ago in San Antonio. A nurse. She does not need money. Yet when it came to BCD I refused unless I could pay her! She refused to take any money and stated she was no longer a provider. This broke my #1 rule keeping it a business relationship. She has a son and is wonderful. She accepts me for who I am! I truly am addicted to seeing and talking to her. She made an interesting observation. She told me I started hobbying because I was hurt by my ex-wife, (Cheating bitch!) but now I hobby because its fun! And I think she is right. She also said, while she has no interest in seeing someone else what I do is my choice. But if a serious relationship was going to come to fruition, I would have to stop hobbying! I know she is reading my posts and has access to my reviews. There are no secrets. For now my life style is not an issue. But in the future it will be, and I will be faced with a choice! Depending on the choice I make, you’ll see the reviews go up, the jokes get cornier or I will just disappear. You won’t see one of those “I leaving, everyone kiss my ass and tell me you love me threads!” I think it was you Burk that said the first 15-20 years were awesome; it was the end that sucks! I agree! I’m just not sure I EVER want to relive the end ever again! Plus how in the hell will I be able to stop having so much fun!? For now, I’m “still looking”. But I’m only looking in one, maybe two directions!

[burkalini]

Originally Posted by Still Looking

Burk,

She was unemployed and didn't need money? Was that NOT a red flag? Personally, in real life you’re all in or not! If NOT it never works! As you probably read I met a gal who was a provider 5 years ago in San Antonio. A nurse. She does not need money. Yet when it came to BCD I refused unless I could pay her! She refused to take any money and stated she was no longer a provider. This broke my #1 rule keeping it a business relationship. She has a son and is wonderful. She accepts me for who I am! I truly am addicted to seeing and talking to her. She made an interesting observation. She told me I started hobbying because I was hurt by my ex-wife, (Cheating bitch!) but now I hobby because its fun! And I think she is right. She also said, while she has no interest in seeing someone else what I do is my choice. But if a serious relationship was going to come to fruition, I would have to stop hobbying! I know she is reading my posts and has access to my reviews. There are no secrets. For now my life style is not an issue. But in the future it will be, and I will be faced with a choice! Depending on the choice I make, you’ll see the reviews go up, the jokes get cornier or I will just disappear. You won’t see one of those “I leaving, everyone kiss my ass and tell me you love me threads!” I think it was you Burk that said the first 15-20 years were awesome; it was the end that sucks! I agree! I’m just not sure I EVER want to relive the end ever again! Plus how in the hell will I be able to stop having so much fun!? For now, I’m “still looking”. But I’m only looking in one, maybe two directions!

Your right it was the red flag that led to me finding out. She had said she had savings from her work previously but as time went on I figured that had to have run out and she was still not asking for any help. When you are all in as you say you tend to overlook the obvious sometimes. As far as the end of my marriage it just became obvious that we had become two different people and both agreed to end it. It was not a bad ending. We still talk all the time and care for each other. I'm sorry your end was bad. Your right in that the hobby is fun. I can't believe how many great sessions I have had with some hot providers. I will say though it doesn't match a real relationship. I think I was very lucky to have the happy time I did with my ex. Keep on looking my friend.

[Still Looking]

Originally Posted by burkalini

Your right it was the red flag that led to me finding out. She had said she had savings from her work previously but as time went on I figured that had to have run out and she was still not asking for any help. When you are all in as you say you tend to overlook the obvious sometimes. As far as the end of my marriage it just became obvious that we had become two different people and both agreed to end it. It was not a bad ending. We still talk all the time and care for each other. I'm sorry your end was bad. Your right in that the hobby is fun. I can't believe how many great sessions I have had with some hot providers. I will say though it doesn't match a real relationship. I think I was very lucky to have the happy time I did with my ex. Keep on looking my friend.

I agree Burk! So for now I'm "Still Looking!"

[CiaoBitchezz!]

Burk I am so sorry that happened, and I am really struggling with this. However I have had something very traumatic happen in my life this morning, and I have to leave the board again as family is more important. Im even setting him to the side as my children are #1 in my life, and my daughter almost lost her life today, the day after she enlisted in the Navy.

I wish everyone well, and until next time, stay safe and kiss your loved ones, as you never know if today is the last day you will have that opportunity.

Peace out

[Sisyphus]

How has ECCIE made it this far w/o an "answer" to the old Companion Experience forum on the P?

Not making light of the OP's experience. It has happened to many who have wandered along this way! Sometimes it goes well. Sometimes it does not. But, it always seems to a generate a fair amount of interest.

Merely stating that it was a thread that popped up on the regular in that old forum. Perhaps, it's time to re-create the experience here for those who wish to share their advice and/or war stories.