Dating a provider or hobbiest

[rharley]

any thoughts or experiences on this one?

[shorty]

Damn! Have we not beat this topic to death already? Search is your friend to find out the answers.

[MUSHROOM MAN]

I have thought about this one several times. It would be the ultimate sexual fulfillment, but the idea of getting that attached to someone that you have to share would be tricky. I know one of the providers I have seen says her boyfriend is cool with it, she says there is no possible way one man could keep her pleased. Very interesting topic, I look forward to seeing more people respond.

[charlestudor2005]

IMHO most providers I have experienced come with a lot of drama. You especially have to look out for the ones that say, "no drama," "100% real pics," "I will be on time." LOL It's just a lot of horse shit.

If you want to mess up your life by dating some of these ladies, so be it.

[Sweet N Little]

Bad things come to those who date It's usually never a happy ending from what Ive heard

[rrabbit6926]

Originally Posted by Sweet N Little

Bad things come to those who date It's usually never a happy ending from what Ive heard

If you want a happy ending it would be quicker and cheaper to just go to a massage parlor.

[Sweet N Little]

Originally Posted by rrabbit6926

If you want a happy ending it would be quicker and cheaper to just go to a massage parlor.

touche Rabbit

[Ginger Doll]

I've tried it before...it's always ended in disappointment.

My all-time favorite situation (<------sarcasm) is when the hobbyist that says he wants to date me...says he wants to simultaneously continue hobbying.

Maybe my self-esteem is just too healthy... But I'll be damned if I'm doling out references for my boyfriend.

[Guest041413-2]

Originally Posted by Ginger Doll

I've tried it before...it's always ended in disappointment.

My all-time favorite situation (<------sarcasm) is when the hobbyist that says he wants to date me...says he wants to simultaneously continue hobbying.

Maybe my self-esteem is just too healthy... But I'll be damned if I'm doling out references for my boyfriend.

LMAO...and, you're right. Usually, from all the tales, as stated this is NOT a new topic, one of the two lacks the (element) to quit and wants the best of both worlds...doesn't work.
(kindness, genuineness, sincerity often taken for granted and as a sign of "weakness" by the other party)

[i'va biggen]

Originally Posted by Sweet N Little

Bad things come to those who date It's usually never a happy ending from what Ive heard

Darn,and I was fix'n to ask you for a date.

[JDNorthface]

Originally Posted by Ginger Doll

... But I'll be damned if I'm doling out references for my boyfriend.

I've always wondered if those guys who "have their wife's permission to hobby" used their wives as references...

[Sweet N Little]

Originally Posted by ekim008

Darn,and I was fix'n to ask you for a date.

Im more than happy to date you, just send your request for a date through p411 LOL
Your too funny Ekim!
My real dating days are over I fear
@ Ginger Doll...damn you look hot in holiday apparel !! mmmmmm!

[evietaylor]

I've said it before, but I'll say it again. You're looking for love in all the WRONG places if you think this will work.

No, no, no, no.

[Outdoorsman]

In my experience the sex is the least of the issues. I know the lady does not want to have sex with all these other men, it is tiring, becomes mundane, and it is a job for her.

I am a monogamous man, and if dating or committed she has to stop and I must stop Hobbying. That is really the simple part.

The problems start when I am supporting the ex-provider and she wants to buy something expensive out side her budget or living expenses, in the past she just took on more dates and earned the extra cash, now it is up to me and if I do not do it, will she take a few Johns in to get that item or trip she wants? Trust is the issue. I cannot and will not be in a realtionahip without trust.

When a lady provides for years, sex becomes no big deal to her, she separates her ego from the act, and it is a job. Well, I, her partner do not see it that way, if she fucks another man it is cheating plain and simple. It is not a means to an end - it is infidelity. So, the issue is trust.

Another issue is most of these women, no not all, have a low self esteem and lower than most people. It is an issue to deal with, she needs constant reassurance that she is important, she is loved, and even with constant loving she still wonders do I love her for her pussy or for who she is. The women are in a profession that is not always legal, cannot be discussed with outside friends or family, it isolates us all, which creates low self esteem. When asked what do you do for a living, she is lying and that chips away at the self worth as well. Whether most women want to admit it or not and I know the human brain tells each and everyone of us, to include me, "that I am different, the job does not effect me like all the rest, I love sex and I orgasm, getting paid for it is good" That is merely a self defense mechanism in the ego to protect ourselves from doing things that could be considered disgraceful. It is the BS we all tell ourselves.

How many women here do this because they have to and how many do it because they enjoy it. I will bet most replies are because they enjoy it. I call BS on that one, most women do it because there is no other way to earn that much cash in that short period of time or because their lifestyle tells them they need to. It all chips away at the self esteem.

So, dating a woman that will wonder if I love her truly or not is not easy, dating a woman that may easily break my trust of fidelity is not easy, dating a woman that boasts about herself because she really feels inadequate inside from so providing is not easy. The boasting is called Grandiosity, when people brag on themselves, it is another lie we tell ourselves to hide our inadequacies.

A woman outside provinding can have these issues as well, but in my experience not to the degree that I have seen inside the Hobby, just me.

Just my experiences and my .02

[Guest110516]

In terms of the title, "Dating a provider or hobbiest" and the question, "any thoughts or experiences on this one?"...

I would rather date a provider than a hobbyist. Sorry dudes.

Seriously, as I've stated in similar threads (superthread anyone?), the likelihood of it ending well is small, but anything is possible.