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07-11-2013, 11:08 PM
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#1
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El Hombre de la Mancha
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 46,370
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Most Interesting/Embarrassing Hobby Experience
Those of us who have been around awhile have had some interesting hobby related experiences.
Mine was from this year. I arrived at a lady's incall to pick her up for dinner and then play time. She was a vision to behold ... She is beautiful to begin with but she entrapped me with a black dress that hugged every curve, black high heeled boots, and hose that had a pattern in them.
She let me in the door and we hugged and kissed. And hugged some more ... I could not take my hands off of her, hunger be damned and I was hungry. I just told her I wanted some cookie. She proceeded to rock my world and totally disorient me. Evil woman. Bad woman. I will explain shortly.
When we were done we had still not eaten food. Rather than going to the restaurant we enjoyed we just did drive thru at the local Whataburger. We went back to her place and sat down and enjoyed the feast that Whataburger catered. We laughed, we talked. I finally left.
Remember I stated she totally disoriented me. About half way home I needed to pee. But I just kept driving, another 30 minutes. By the time I got home my eyeballs were floating. I immediately let my dogs out and I hustled back to the bathroom to pee. Well, I was leaning against the wall peeing. However, I never heard the sound of pee hitting the water in the toilet bowl. When I looked down I discovered I was peeing into the condom.
The condom was huge at this point by any measure, remember I have 1.3" of dangling death. I was more than a bit shocked. Initially, my first thought was where did this condom come from? I quickly figured the answer to that question as I clenched up and removed the pee filled condom and dropped it into my toilet and then continued to pee some more.
Let us thinck about the length of time this condom was on my 1.3" of dangling death. The evil woman that I saw disoriented me so much that after finishing the session we dressed, ate Whataburger, laughed, talked for a while. Then I drove one hour home to finally discover I still had the condom on from over five hours earlier. Bad woman disorienting fucktard.
I texted this tale to the evil, disorienting woman. She laughed her ass off, and was relieved. She was pleased at herself bad self for scrambling my brain that much. She was relieved that I located the condom. She told me she searched the bed, the floor, and the bathroom. She did not remember me flushing it. She was starting to explore her vajajay looking for the missing condom.
The lady obviously uses a very good brand of condom. We still laugh at my misfortune and disorientation to this day. It was a very good session and tainted fun was had by all.
So what is your story?
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07-12-2013, 02:25 AM
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#2
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Account Disabled
User ID: 121508
Join Date: Feb 11, 2012
Location: biloxi
Posts: 762
My ECCIE Reviews
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What brand was it?
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| 2 users liked this post
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07-12-2013, 04:07 AM
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#3
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El Hombre de la Mancha
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 46,370
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I have no idea. I will ask.
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| 1 user liked this post
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07-12-2013, 06:32 AM
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#4
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Account Disabled
User ID: 117397
Join Date: Jan 14, 2012
Location: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Posts: 8,428
My ECCIE Reviews
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Hilarious! I must meet this lady!
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07-13-2013, 12:52 PM
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#5
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El Hombre de la Mancha
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 46,370
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Calista_Syn
What brand was it?
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Trojan Magnum Ecstasy XL, she said it will even fit the likes of me.
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07-13-2013, 01:10 PM
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#6
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El Hombre de la Mancha
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 46,370
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The bad woman, in a wonderful way, coerced me into writing the review. Bad Woman ...
http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=788130
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07-13-2013, 03:41 PM
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#7
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Jan 5, 2010
Posts: 25,367
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Hell of a story.......very good review. But, you won't get credit for it.........
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07-13-2013, 06:38 PM
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#8
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El Hombre de la Mancha
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 46,370
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I lived the experience, that is all the credit I need, beotches.
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07-13-2013, 10:38 PM
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#9
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Aug 19, 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 120
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While not in the immediate context of an encounter, this was the result of numerous encounters over the course of several years.
For some time my special friend and I had met at the Old Family Homestead, since is was centrally located and vacant. After each evening together we would take some time to "sanitize" the place, in the event other family members might decide to come by or perhaps neighbors with keys checking on the place. After time, we began experiencing plumbing issues and assumed it was tree roots in the septic pipes. I called the plumber, an old family friend, and he proceeded to repair and clean out the lines.
He asked if my mother had been in the habit of using "Lots of baby-wipes?". I claimed ignorance and asked why... to which he replied that there was probably four feet of the line which was clogged with tightly packed baby-wipes. They apparently snagged on the roots which had infiltrated and did not tend to "break down" easily. Fortunately condoms and wrappers found an alternate method of disposal.
This is an event which still brings some tears of laughter... and which did serve to cause us to modify our residue disposal techniques!
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07-13-2013, 11:15 PM
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#10
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Account Disabled
User ID: 121508
Join Date: Feb 11, 2012
Location: biloxi
Posts: 762
My ECCIE Reviews
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pyramider
Trojan Magnum Ecstasy XL, she said it will even fit the likes of me.
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07-14-2013, 11:10 PM
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#11
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Account Disabled
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SOULMANIKE
Hell of a story.......very good review. But, you won't get credit for it.........
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Who gives a fuck about 'credit' for the review?! Good grief, lighten up.
Fucking hilarious and I laughed as hard as I did, when you told me about it when you got home
Muah!
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07-15-2013, 03:56 AM
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#12
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El Hombre de la Mancha
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 46,370
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I am contacting Trojan for an endorsement deal.
It took a long time to send that text, I was laughing too hard to text. Yes, you scrambled my brain that much ... evil woman.
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07-15-2013, 06:43 AM
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#13
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The Original Freak Doll
User ID: 44612
Join Date: Sep 13, 2010
Location: SW Fort Worth
Posts: 3,459
My ECCIE Reviews
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Most interesting/embarassing hobby experience...
Well I won't name names... but I had a hobbyist contact me because he wanted to have sex on a horse. As in he wanted me and him to ride double and do it on horseback... I agreed to do it and we met up at the stable bright and early... My horse is not real sweet and docile and she is BIG and she knows it. Well it is a huge ordeal to get her bridled and I have to really struggle with her until she finally realizes I am not going to quit so she gives up.
Well she is acting like a wild mustang and the hobbyist kept saying ... "ummm... I don't think she likes that." He was looking a little nervous.
I finally got her bridled and saddled and lead her out of the barn and ask him if he's ready. He says... "Let's maybe do this some other time..." I tell him, "You came all the way out here and got up at 5am... You can at least get on her..."
So he got on and I led him around like a pony ride. It was a very interesting experience...
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07-15-2013, 01:48 PM
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#14
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Sep 30, 2011
Location: I can see FTW from here
Posts: 5,611
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I met her in Las Vegas when we were counting cards, counting cards,
we were counting cards, she was very sparkly very shiny.
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07-15-2013, 06:00 PM
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#15
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Jul 2, 2010
Posts: 5,318
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I met the lady for the first time and I had reservations at Ruth's Chris in Dallas. I met her in the elevator and we were damn near connected by the eighth floor. I had her panties in my pocket by the second floor. We fooled around and debated going to dinner. Driving over there I was playing with her with my right hand and driving with my left hand. I drove right by the restaurant and drove around the block. She still laughs about my bad driving. Dallas still makes me lose my ability to think clearly.
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