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09-03-2012, 05:44 PM
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#1
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Premium Access
Join Date: Jul 26, 2012
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 280
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Mother rapers...Father Rapers....
then the biggest father raper of them all sat down beside me and said "Son", what are you in for?, and I looked at him and said " Littering", and they all took a step back.....one of the funniest damn lines from Alice's Restaurant....anyone else remember...
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09-03-2012, 05:46 PM
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#2
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Premium Access
Join Date: Jul 26, 2012
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 280
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Hmm....probably should have moved this to the sandbox.....
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09-03-2012, 07:23 PM
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#3
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Apr 5, 2011
Location: Lincoln, Nebraska
Posts: 616
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- '...They got a building down New York City, it's called Whitehall Street, where you walk in, you get injected, inspected, detected, infected, neglected and selected. I went down to get my physical examination one day, and I walked in, I sat down, got good and drunk the night before, so I looked and felt my best when I went in that morning.
- And I waked in and sat down and they gave me a piece of paper, said, "Kid, see the psychiatrist, room 604." And I went up there, I said, "Shrink, I want to kill. I mean, I wanna, I wanna kill. Kill. I wanna, I wanna see, I wanna see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth. Eat dead burnt bodies. I mean kill, Kill, KILL, KILL." And I started jumping up and down yelling, "KILL, KILL," and he started jumping up and down with me and we was both jumping up and down yelling, "KILL, KILL." And the Sargent came over, pinned a medal on me, sent me down the hall, said, "You're our boy."
- Group W's where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father rapers!
- And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly 'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay $50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?" And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till I said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand, and we had a great time on the bench.
- I went over to the Sargent, said, "Sargent, you got a lot a damn gall to ask me if I've rehabilitated myself, I mean, I mean, I mean that just, I'm sitting here on the bench, I mean I'm sitting here on the Group W bench 'cause you want to know if I'm moral enough join the army, burn women, kids, houses and villages after being a litterbug."...'
Yeah, I'm a fan too.
Ever hear of Davis Bromberg and "Bullfrogs in my Eyes"?
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09-03-2012, 07:37 PM
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#4
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Jan 8, 2012
Location: Where the East peters out
Posts: 1,156
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Ol' Arlo wrote a song perfect for Nebraska. I sing it everytime I'm drivin' to the big city.
It's called "Dead skunk in the middle of the road"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EaN7xuAIjXI
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09-03-2012, 09:48 PM
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#5
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jan 10, 2011
Location: nebraska
Posts: 2,713
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Arlo did not write the song Louden Wainwright III did.
Actually I thought of that song when back in the 70's I got taken to the city jail on my birthday because my dog got a ticket that I did not pay. It was a weekend and my lawyer had to call a judge to get me out.
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09-07-2012, 08:56 PM
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#6
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jul 4, 2012
Location: Omaha
Posts: 251
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Don't forget the 27, 8x10 color glossy photos...
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09-07-2012, 09:12 PM
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#7
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Ambassador
Join Date: Dec 25, 2009
Location: The Interhemispheric Fissure
Posts: 6,565
My ECCIE Reviews
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Moved here from co-ed.
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