Hurt...

[Scribe]

Tonight, I actually got hurt... I know that there are "rules" we should all go by to protect ourselves and our feelings from this. The fact that we chose this as our playground, and Hobbying as a choice should mean that we are icy enough to avoid getting burnt.

But sometimes it happens.

I had a discussion with a provider who felt something I wrote, slighted her while we were messaging. When she brought it to my attention, I explained my thoughts, apologized profusely, and did all I could to clear up the misunderstanding... but I failed.

Ladies, I can't and don't speak for people here... but there could be some guys - like me, who actually have the respect and good heart that was brought upon them by our upbringing.

We are here to play, but we do it in the spirit of mutual enjoyment and no drama.

And sometimes we say, or do the wrong thing - but if you bring those mistakes to our attention; we would always be willing to make amends.

In this case - it ruined what should have been a great evening - for both of us.

I won't mention her. This isn't about throwing blame off me - it's about a sincere apology to the respect of someone (I continue to believe) is probably a beautiful person, who just didn't realize - not all guys are jerks.

To those I have been with - you know me - I go out of my way to not only make every meeting special, but indulgent and wonderful. I sincerely don't know how I said something taken so wrong... but again, I'm sorry.

I don't wish to become as jaded as some... or as hardened. But this one cut me deep.

[Chung Tran]

sounds like you are well-meaning, Scribe.. of course, I can't really evaluate what happened, you are speaking too generally. I wonder though, if you were simply misunderstood?

take my thread in Sandbox, where you and I sparred, over the Fort Worth police officer, whom I think should be in jail, and you defended.. I think you were playing Devil's advocate, more than actually defending his actions, yet you disappeared from the thread right after the evidence against the Cop got strong.. as if you could no longer defend what you had been saying, so you bailed.

of course, you may have simply tired of the back-and-forth, I get it.. but one could also view it as "Scribe bailed, because he can't defend his support of the Cop any longer".. just saying.. the same behavior can be viewed with different lenses.

[Scribe]

Thanks CT...
This was about a possible extended session. As there was no rate listed in the showcase (she had an hr & hhr rate listed, then it just said "multi hour discounts!")..

...so I wanted to inquire but didn't know if a multi- hour was possible... when I asked I eluded to the fact that she might have other appointments, and I didn't want to screw up her schedule.

She took major offense to this, feeling that I insinuated that she was somehow "a certain kind of girl who would do that (more than a single client in a day... because she posted that she doesn't do "b2b" - which I thought meant "quickly, and minimally spaced" not b2b = more than a single client in a day) and she obviously wasn't".

My point was - I was trying to be polite, trying to be respectful of her rates and available time schedule when making the inquiry - but also trying to make certain I had enough funds, without being insulting of her by saying something like "I'd like to see you for x hours, but only have so much funds".

In my attempt to be polite and respectful of her rates and time - I somehow insulted her in the insinuation that she may have other clients later in the evening. Or, that my offer somehow hinged around 'bargaining her down" when in fact it was being respectful of a rate I didn't know - and she hadn't posted.

Either way, it upset her. Wrecked the meeting. And got to me.

(As to the Coed cop thing - I respect your opinions CT, but yeah... we had talked it out. Good thread and good interaction though - people should read it.)

[PeterBota]

Grow sum balls

[Scribe]

Originally Posted by PeterBota

Grow sum balls

You're correct PB... exactly my point. You would never react to this the way I do.

[broes]

A dude got emotionally "hurt" on Eccie. You are such a sensitive soul. Lineup ladies, there is no IOP with this guy. lolol

[Caravano]

I ask my provider that also , sometimes because I have fund's for another date ... Other times so I know I'll be taking her home soon.Should not be an issue asking that to your provider.

[Sir Lancehernot]

You can never know what will piss them off.

Never forget: You need them more than they need you.

[BLM69]

Originally Posted by broes

A dude got emotionally "hurt" on Eccie. You are such a sensitive soul. Lineup ladies, there is no IOP with this guy. lolol

OP just became a target for the hustler ladies in here, this is not the place for sensitive guys or the romantic types treating sessions like RW dates with a special someone. X2 in growing some balls

[Brookpwa]

I had a similar experience this evening. The session ran over. And the gentlemen stated, that he better hurry up cause i may have someone else coming. I wasn't expecting anyone else. So I told him dont worry about that. When he mentioned again. I got annoyed only because it's not the client's responablity to worry about my schedule. Trust me if I had someone else scheduled. I would have said something. My client was scheduled and paid for a half hour. He was here an hour. I didn't even realize how long he had been here. Time flies when your having fun. I would prefer a session run over with a client leaving satisfied and not feeling rushed, over an alarm dinging Time is up you have put your shoes on outside dont worry It's cold out it will go down when you walk out. I understand you were trying to be considerate as was my client. It can be perceived that your being nosy. So GUYS DON'T WORRY OR IMPLY THAT I MAY HAVE SOMEONE ELSE COMING. ITS NOT Business or your job to worry about the Providers Scheduled. Perhaps you realized that, and that is why your hurt. Just saying.

[pmdelites]

brookpwa, exactly what i was thinking - focus on the session and let the provider take care of responsibilities wrt appts.

i read two takeaways in these posts.

1. keep scheduling discussions focused on the appt you want to make !!! NEVER bring up your guess or assumption that a provider is booking other appts either before or after your appt. or that you are communicating w/ other providers abt booking. there is almost no upside into bringing that up. unless you wanna schedule a three- or four-some w/ her and someone else (another provider or another guy).

2. if a provider doesnt list the appt length you're interested in scheduling, then just inquire about it and nothing else !!! "i saw that you offer multi-hour discounts. what is the fee for (x amount of time)?". again, no upside in assuming she's booking lots appts around yours.


so, scribe, while i'm sorry you two had to go thru this, hopefully you've understood what the problem was and learned not to do it again.

[Roy Wally]

This is ridiculous.

[berkleigh]

Call me in the morning! I have a 5 hour road trip tomorrow and will listen

[TinMan]

If you were worried about scheduling, you should have simply expressed concern that she might have something else going on...no mention of other appointments. Some of these women have lives beyond the hobby, so assuming the only reason she won't be available is because she's fucking another john is pretty much asking for trouble.

[L.A.]

The hobby is supposed to be fun, enjoyable, reduce stress. If you get into situations like this something is wrong. Either you're too invested in a P4P situation or you're seeing the wrong provider.
I'm not saying I've never had my emotions involved in the hobby but it's important to recognize that's not how this is supposed to work. These are more general comments and not specifically directed to the OP.