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Old 08-26-2011, 09:57 AM   #1
Codybeast
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Default Do men over 50 really NEED sex?

This is not to be confused with enjoying sex to which of course the answer would be yes. Otherwise we would not be here.
A parallel thread inspired this topic.

What is it that inspires 50+ year old men to pay $250 or $350 for an hour of something they simply no longer physically need as much as they did when younger?
Perhaps my perception is a bit skewed because being in my early 50's I am still fit, not too ugly with reasonable social skills. As a result I get play on a fairly regular basis from local free dating sites and meetup groups. In addition I usually have to insist upon paying for meals.

The difference I find is that now in my early fifties I am no longer a walking penis in search of a hole to stick myself into. I don't have to get laid in order to be able to function or think clearly.

I earn $70 an hour making a lifetime lasting difference in people's lives so when I now see $250-$300+ for an hour of (at best) temporary physical gratification I am starting to scratch my head in amazement that I have done this as often as I have.

If I need release because it has been over a week and I am not in the mood to wine and dine for an evening and then find myself perusing provider ads I simply handle it myself. I mean literally and the urge for company instantly vanishes with no sense of having settled for less.
In fact, that is right about the point when I say to myself “Whew! Close one. You just saved yourself a shitload of money that you don't need to be blowing”.

Also many guys over 50 without cost prohibitive performance enhancement drugs find sex to be a source of anxiety to boot.

Then there is the other common sense factor of the obvious in business. If my senior life manages to get along just fine without paying one dollar for sex than what conceivable reason is there for paying 3 1/2 times my income to someone who absolutely needs what I have to survive?

I am not knocking the hobby nor those who participate in it. Our money is ours to do with as we see fit but the question is do seniors really NEED it enough to justify the cost and if so why?
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Old 08-26-2011, 10:34 AM   #2
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When I split from my ex I was in my late 50s, and like you in good physical shape, not bad looking, and had no problem getting along with others. I got onto match.com and actually met my current wife through that dating website. I have to say that I try not "use" women. Most of the women on true dating websites, especially in our age group, are looking for serious relationships and not a roll in the hay every once in a while. I felt guilty having sex with them while they were looking for something lasting and I, for the most part, was not.

Even at my age, I enjoy great sex with a woman at least once a week and back then a provider was the easiest way to accomplish that, with the least amount of guilt/problems. I'm not going to argue with you about the price of such a "date" other than to say the price met the goal and I rarely thought that I overpaid for the time. However, there is a point at which I say "No way". Ever see what HDHs (High Dollar Hotties) charge?
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Old 08-26-2011, 11:42 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SpeedRacerXXX View Post
I have to say that I try not "use" women. Most of the women on true dating websites, especially in our age group, are looking for serious relationships and not a roll in the hay every once in a while. I felt guilty having sex with them while they were looking for something lasting and I, for the most part, was not.
I get that. What's interesting though is that I have actually experienced the exact opposite.

I find women around our age have been around the block a few times and pretty much live in the moment. They aren't naive googly eyed chickadees anymore.

They know that if you end up in bed on the first or second date there is a very high probability that this is a physical attraction thing and they simply appreciate and enjoy it for what it is. If it ends there fine and if it blossoms into something greater even better.

Remember like us they are 45+ and single for a reason assuming they are not widowed.
Thus far I have generated no hurt feelings and they still call for repeats which tells me we are on the same page.
Mature women are no longer looking for the father of their future children or someone to build a life from scratch with.
Like us they seem to simply appreciate good company, mature intelligent conversation and great sex. That's my experience anyway.
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Old 08-26-2011, 11:46 AM   #4
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I just very recently turned 50....

There is still a need for sex at this age and older; albiet not as strong as when in your early 20's when a strong gust of wind blew across your pants and you got an instant erection....

We go throught the stage of being a knuckle dragging upright walking erection ready to pounce on anything, thump our chest, and move on to the next "flavor of the month" to the stage of searching for a more intimate GFE experience; talking, visiting, slow exploration,etc. versus the wham-bam $100 experience...

I, personally, love meeting new people; whether from friends lining up dates for me, or spotting someone on the board who catches my eye and decide I want to spend some time with her; and will pay accordingly for a quality time together...

It is the thrill of meeting someone new that keeps you young...

I travel extensively; I live on airplanes and in hotels; and currently split my time between Austin and Europe six months at a time, so I will look for the companionship side of the hobby experience; when you begin looking at it from the standpoint of "why bother; I just saved myself a shitload of money", then I think you are subconsiously starting to lean away from the hobby...

There is a need for sex at 50; not just to "use" a lady; but more of a need for a "companionship" feel to the encounter...just my opinion....
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Old 08-26-2011, 12:34 PM   #5
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MPOV

There's a difference between sex & intimacy.
Men age 50 & older, need that sexual release now just as much as they did when they were younger. It's part of human nature. And they *enjoy* intimacy even more, at their new found mature age. They make beautiful lovers! Hands down.

I've yet to find a man in his 50's who doesn't *physically need sex* like they did when they were younger. They may or may not function as they once did. But then again, they may function even more so as they get older. And do so w/o the help of a blue pill & do so w/o anxiety.
50 is the new 30. And definitely better than a 20y/o.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Codybeast View Post
This is not to be confused with enjoying sex to which of course the answer would be yes. Otherwise we would not be here.
A parallel thread inspired this topic.

What is it that inspires 50+ year old men to pay $250 or $350 for an hour of something they simply no longer physically need as they did when younger?
Perhaps my perception is a bit skewed because being in my early 50's I am still fit, not too ugly with reasonable social skills. As a result I get play on a fairly regular basis from local free dating sites and meetup groups. In addition I usually have to insist upon paying for meals.

The difference I find is that now in my early fifties I am no longer a walking penis in search of a hole to stick myself into. I don't have to get laid in order to be able to function or think clearly.

I earn $70 an hour making a life time lasting difference in people's lives so when I now see $250-$300+ for an hour of (at best) temporary physical gratification I am starting to scratch my head in amazement that I have done this as often as I have.

If I need release because it has been over a week and I am not in the mood to wine and dine for an evening and then find myself perusing provider ads I simply handle it myself. I mean literally and the urge for company instantly vanishes with no sense of having settled for less.
In fact, that is right about the point when I say to myself “Whew! Close one. You just saved yourself a shitload of money that you don't need to be blowing”.

Also many guys over 50 without cost prohibitive performance enhancement drugs find sex to be a source of anxiety to boot.

Then there is the other common sense factor of the obvious in business. If my senior life manages to get along just fine without paying one dollar for sex than what conceivable reason is there for paying 3 1/2 times my income to someone who absolutely needs what I have to survive?

I am not knocking the hobby nor those who participate in it. Our money is ours to do with as we see fit but the question is do seniors really NEED it enough to justify the cost and if so why?
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Old 08-26-2011, 12:44 PM   #6
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I think this topic really begs the question of what need really is. runswithscissors touched on how need can be seen differently, that he still needs it at 50+. I will even say that I never really needed sex, even at 18 or 20. It was always a want. Worst case, Rosy Palm was always an option.

I think whether we look at it as a want or a need, it's still there, just to a different degree.

I'm over a decade away from being 50, and don't have problems dating or finding women my age without using online avenues. Problem is that many of the women my age or slightly older tend to have gathered their share of baggage. Maybe things will be different in another 10 years, I don't know. It just seems that as we get older, we care less and less about hiding our "eccentricities", we're set in our ways, and we don't care about hiding how BSC we are (we = both men and women).

It also depends on where you're sampling women from. I've known plenty of <25 year old who want to have fun before settling down while many 19 year olds want to find a man and pop out a baby ASAP. Others just don't want to be promiscuous, ever.

I don't buy "using" women as long as you're not lying to get into her panties. That's just lying, if you need to lie to get laid, you really should be paying for it. If they are OK with casual sex when you meet, but change their mind later, that's their problem.
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Old 08-26-2011, 01:16 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rand Al'Thor View Post
I don't buy "using" women as long as you're not lying to get into her panties. That's just lying, if you need to lie to get laid, you really should be paying for it. If they are OK with casual sex when you meet, but change their mind later, that's their problem.
To me there's a huge difference between lying and not telling the truth. I never lied to the women I met after my split from my wife, but I'd be willing to be if I had been truthful and told them I wasn't interested in anything but a casual sexual relationship, I wouldn't have gotten laid.

Codybeast, interesting perspective. You could very well be more right than I.
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Old 08-26-2011, 01:35 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wicked Milf View Post
MPOV

There's a difference between sex & intimacy.
Men age 50 & older, need that sexual release now just as much as they did when they were younger. It's part of human nature. And they *enjoy* intimacy even more, at their new found mature age. They make beautiful lovers! Hands down.

I've yet to find a man in his 50's who doesn't *physically need sex* like they did when they were younger. They may or may not function as they once did. But then again, they may function even more so as they get older. And do so w/o the help of a blue pill & do so w/o anxiety.
50 is the new 30. And definitely better than a 20y/o.
I agree.

Most of my gentlemen friends are 50+, some quite fit and pleasant in appearance and perfectly capable of catching female attention in the "real world," but that isn't always the issue. While sex is important to them, their "needs" may or may not be physically based. They may want other, or perhaps, added stimulation. There is a misconception that the hobby is ALL about sex, "temporary physical gratification," when companionship, whether for an hour, an eve, a night, a week, is often what's actually desired. And while the "free" dating sites are fine for some, you're usually going to find more honesty and have your expectations more compatibly met in an expedient manner and without complications by a provider with a well-defined history of posts, reviews, and a comprehensive website.

Sexuality is not age-resistant. We are sexual beings until we're dead, even if we can't enter the Orgy Olympics anymore but have to take things at a slower pace, which I enjoy even more! The rushing of the under-30 crowd gets tiresome.
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Old 08-26-2011, 01:47 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Codybeast View Post
....I earn $70 an hour making a life time lasting difference in people's lives so when I now see $250-$300+ for an hour of (at best) temporary physical gratification I am starting to scratch my head in amazement that I have done this as often as I have....
You're assuming that no ladies on here have made a lasting difference in a life? That is incorrect, but privacy dictates that you'll just have to trust me on this.
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Old 08-26-2011, 02:42 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fancyinheels View Post
You're assuming that no ladies on here have made a lasting difference in a life? That is incorrect, but privacy dictates that you'll just have to trust me on this.
No doubt I'm sure. I can only speak from my own personal experience as a past and satisfied monger.
They have all been wonderful and sexy ladies but I have never met even one whose service improved the quality of my life in anyway beyond scratching a momentary itch.
Certainly not enough to justify why I've spent four times what I earn per hour ($70/hr isn't cheap) to make that dramatic difference in other's lives.
As Provider/Client we are both very nice people but the bottom line is she is after my $$$ and I am just after a piece of ass and she just happened to be available when the mood struck.

I guess RWS has a point about my possibly outgrowing or leaning away from the hobby. Been a very long time since I've booked a session and don't miss it.
I can no longer justify the the high cost and unnecessary expenditure the way I once did. Again that's just me.
Who knows maybe I'll see some gorgeous petite exotic provider ad or review that'll blow this mindset all to hell but somehow I doubt it
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Old 08-26-2011, 04:45 PM   #11
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Although I love the sex at 51, I seem to need my sessions to satisfy my craving for attention and lack of love at home, even it is for just an hour of fantasy passion. For just a little while I am on top of the world....with the right provider anyway....and she knows who she is.
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Old 08-26-2011, 05:04 PM   #12
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YES!
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Old 08-26-2011, 06:43 PM   #13
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I see your point Cody.

I am 42 & need/want a "date" at least twice per week. I am fortunate to know about P4P, so I choose to get paid.

I do admit that 250 per hr is a lot of money, but the market is there.

I offer a "Date" for $350. This date includes BCD time & a home cooked dinner (we can also go out to a restaurant) I advertise as a 3hr date, but I do not watch the clock.

I had an absolutely wonderful evening on Wed for 5hrs, at the same 350$ rate.

I also have more than BCD needs & do enjoy the actual company of a gent.
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Old 08-26-2011, 07:00 PM   #14
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Do men over 50 really need sex?

Well what is the alternative? Just curious.

Every living thing needs sex. Even if its every blue moon. Nobody is saying you need to pay for it every time. Or should I say see a provider every time you get the urge.
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Old 08-26-2011, 08:55 PM   #15
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50+. I still get cranky if I don't get it every day, and I still go crazy if I don't get it for a few days. I wish I didn't need it, but I do.
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