Important Life lessons I have learned from Science fiction and fantasy.

[JayceeRivers]

As I am well known for my obsession with the genre of science fiction and fantasy I thought it would be entertaining to list the various things I have learned. As a whole this is meant to be funny, though there are some elements of of real lessons in there. Feel free to add your own!

1. Virgins are the first to die, be kidnapped, or be sacrificed. Get rid of that immediately!
2. In case of a zombie apocalypse do NOT go to a large overly populated city. Seek out a country farm house. Preferably as far north as possible.
3. If the emergency is global or national, the government likely has a hand in it. So do not seek governmental help.
4. Trust NO ONE! Even grandma could be an alien disguised!
5. Have as much sex as possible before things get rough. Otherwise you are tempted to have sex at very dangerous and idiotic times.
6. If something unusual appears out of nowhere such as a door, ship, person, or item. DO NOT inspect it. Buy a plane ticket for the furthest state/country you can find before some other idiot does inspect it.
7. Very attractive naked women that appear out of nowhere are just as dangerous as a bomb. Avoid at all costs.
8. If blond, dye your hair the moment a national or global emergency occurs. Blonds tend to die first.
9. Whether vampires glitter, or look like dried up prunes, they are dangerous and only cause drama. Avoid at all costs.
10. If given the option to have all the answers DECLINE! Best to live in oblivious contentment. Knowing all the answers always makes you a target. (DON'T TAKE THE BLUE PILL)

[BigDeal]

Originally Posted by JayceeRivers

As I am well known for my obsession with the genre of science fiction and fantasy I thought it would be entertaining to list the various things I have learned. As a whole this is meant to be funny, though there are some elements of of real lessons in there. Feel free to add your own!

1. Have as much sex as possible before things get rough. Otherwise you are tempted to have sex at very dangerous and idiotic times.
2. Very attractive naked women that appear out of nowhere are just as dangerous as a bomb. Avoid at all costs.
3. Whether vampires glitter, or look like dried up prunes, they are dangerous and only cause drama. Avoid at all costs.

OK so these 3 babe are the ones I would have the most problem with...

A) My 2 kids were a result of the firstnot sure I can maintain
B) What if they they just average...can I have sex then?
C) Well there goes my dream of having sex and getting sucked dry by Jessica (Debra Ann Woll) in True Blood!

[Unique_Carpenter]

Jc:
So did you recently watch the 78 version, or the 56 version, of "Invasion of the Body Snatchers"?

[JRLawrence]

Originally Posted by JayceeRivers

As I am well known for my obsession with the genre of science fiction and fantasy....

Dear Jaycee,

You can put your worries away. This is fiction and fantasy; just stuff someone made up for pure entertainment. So rest easy, and have fun with it because we know it is not true.

You do realize that putting the word science and fiction together is the biggest contradiction of terms of all time; thus it is, the supeme oxymoron.

But, enjoy the fantasy.

JR

[Johnny4455]

7. Very attractive naked women that appear out of nowhere are just as dangerous as a bomb. Avoid at all costs.

... Maybe this is why I am not a big sci-Fi fan. Very attractive naked women appearing out of nowhere should be f**ked hard, right away.

[Unique_Carpenter]

Ahh, Johnny, you have no idea what unfulfilled fantasies you have missed out on.
Example: 2069 A Sex Odyssey (74)

But for Jc's original comment:
The Atomic Brain (64) Actual film release title: Monstrosity
Two female transplants become zombies and the third becomes a deadly feline

Thank you Jc, I'm dredging up old west coast stuff, and smiling.

[DallasRain]

lol Great post/answers!

Not sure about sci-fii and fantasy...but I luv scary movies and have found :

that the couple who is fucking first is killed first!

Also Final destination is one of my favorite scary movies,so i have seen them all over & over again! NOw whenever i am driving and I get behind a logging truck carrying logs,I will detour or pass it! lol

[algrace]

Possibilities present in the genre tend to be just plausible enough for publishers, TV/movie execs and the target audience.

The detailed workings of future tech are left up to imagination, which is where they belong.

On the one hand, if a small group of powerful people knew how the creative solutions found in sci-fi worked, top astrophysicists and other scientists would already have developed not just designs for interstellar travel, but launched into another solar system for colonization.
We are too proud a people not to continue imperial conquest of space.

Or perhaps we have all been fed the ideas of leaked government tech already in use as a fiction limited to entertainment. Think for about the implications of Star Trek's food synthesizer. I assert most of the world's governments would rather see famine and poverty than worldwide prosperity.

[Unique_Carpenter]

Al,
No fair quoting from various sci fi plots this early in the morning.

Only somewhat joking btw.

[JayceeRivers]

So serious! Though I did get a smile from the responses. My original post was made predominantly in jest.

[Unique_Carpenter]

Originally Posted by JayceeRivers

... My original post was made predominantly in jest.

[algrace]

Hmmm, taken a step too far perhaps.


Another lesson learned - to escape captivity, one has the greatest chances when accompanied by a rogue/traitor from the other side. Unwounded freedom is dicey even if guards are distracted and most likely when approached one-on-one. Being outnumbered is for more formidable opponents that prefer to keep a prisoner.

[yugdlo]

Originally Posted by JayceeRivers

As I am well known for my obsession with the genre of science fiction and fantasy I thought it would be entertaining to list the various things I have learned. As a whole this is meant to be funny, though there are some elements of of real lessons in there. Feel free to add your own!

1. Virgins are the first to die, be kidnapped, or be sacrificed. Get rid of that immediately!
2. In case of a zombie apocalypse do NOT go to a large overly populated city. Seek out a country farm house. Preferably as far north as possible.
3. If the emergency is global or national, the government likely has a hand in it. So do not seek governmental help.
4. Trust NO ONE! Even grandma could be an alien disguised!
5. Have as much sex as possible before things get rough. Otherwise you are tempted to have sex at very dangerous and idiotic times.
6. If something unusual appears out of nowhere such as a door, ship, person, or item. DO NOT inspect it. Buy a plane ticket for the furthest state/country you can find before some other idiot does inspect it.
7. Very attractive naked women that appear out of nowhere are just as dangerous as a bomb. Avoid at all costs.
8. If blond, dye your hair the moment a national or global emergency occurs. Blonds tend to die first.
9. Whether vampires glitter, or look like dried up prunes, they are dangerous and only cause drama. Avoid at all costs.
10. If given the option to have all the answers DECLINE! Best to live in oblivious contentment. Knowing all the answers always makes you a target. (DON'T TAKE THE BLUE PILL)

Jaycee, I didn't see anything about never trust the robots.

[BigMikeinKC]

I thought science fiction + fantasy = Scientology.

Now I'll be labelled as a Suppressive Person....


Jaycee -

You forgot one - Don't fuck with Rick Grimes!

[FrankieP]

Wish I had seen this when you first posted it. So many cliches to explore.

In older scifi (50s-60s,): The technology that is supposed to make your life better is trying to kill you.

In fantasy: Books must come in trilogies. (Thanks Tolkien).

In film: Don't be the black guy. The black guy never makes it to the end.

Star Trek: If it can be fucked, Kirk will fuck it.