Civie relationships and sex

[Lil Oral Annie]

Providers and hobbyists: Do you find that you prefer providing to having a civie relationship or sex?

I find that I get much more excitement out of providing than I do with civie sex. That adrenaline rush isn't there in the civie world.

I'm not sure how to explain it.

How do you feel? What's your take?

[Guest082513-02]

I have not had civie boink in 2 years. Just not worth it. I prefer the NSA open minded fawkfests.. over civi boink.

[BigBaldBlk]

I'm in the early stages of Civie sex with an old friend. Since there is a history, it's all good. Not sure I'd take another civie opportunity if it presented itself. Like L-twice said, I like the NSA better!

[Cpalmson]

Define NSA. I think you can have a civie NSA arrangement. Call it "friends with benefits". Personally if I could find the right civie gal to set up a nice little discreet NSA dates, I would. Nothing against the pay for play game. I'd probably still do it, but it does get expensive. The way I play, I not only pay the donation rate, but more and more I'm paying $100 extra just to pay for the room. It is not cost effective.

[Gucci]

I've sort of given up the hobby for civie sex, it's a rather nice arrangement, we get together talk, and enjoy each others company and I give her the " meat pistol " and it doesn't cost me $200-$500 a session. I really like the no strings attached part, I have someone who isn't pleasing me sexually and so does she so we get together and express ourselves sexually and move on.

[acp5762]

Civilian relationships actually make more sense. Escorts aren't there for you, nor do I believe they care if you had a good time or not. Although my experiences with Escorts have been far and in between, I just see them to scratch an itch from time to time. I know some guys try to attract and become friends with escorts as if they are civie girls, thats fine if thats what floats your boat. The determining factor is the money when it comes down to it.

[JDNorthface]

Let me see if I can add a coherent thought to this conversation. As someone above stated, it's hard to articulate our feelings on this subject.

Personally, I separate civie sex and provider sex. Generally, they don't overlap. When I'm in a relationship, there is a different kind of bond and emotional connection. That usually leads to what might be better termed 'lovemaking.' And it is strong and powerful and intoxicating.

But outside of those relationships, sometimes one desires 'just sex.' Providers who are emotionally stable enough to understand that are just a pure blast to visit and worth every dime. They are unencumbered, uninhibited and just really understand how to have fun sex. Then I leave. And they leave. And we don't pretend like there is more. This is why I'll remain forever convinced that any lady can have sex for money but it takes a special calling to be a provider. We are all naturally wired up to be drawn close to those with whom we are intimate. To be able to deny that urge and have uninhibited sex, especially regularly with an ATF, takes a special couple of people.

And that's all I have to say about that.

[Lil Oral Annie]

I just wanted to make sure I wasn't alone in how I felt about it. Traci Brooks says it best on her website (totally portraying my feelings):


"I offer a genuine GFE experience. I enjoy spending time with my special friends, and offer all of the comfort and affection that a girlfriend might, without the hassle of keeping one full-time!

What could be better than that? You get all the perks, without the commitment.

I am a very affectionate woman, and have a hard time not finding things I like about almost anyone. My commitment issues are your ticket to guilt-free genuine affection and attention."



She totally nailed it on the head for me. When I read her site the other day, I was just in awe that someone else could feel the same way.

I've tried the dating thing and such, and it just has no oomph for me.

[Guest082513-02]

Love that quote Annie. From a female standpoint.. i have yet to find a civi that would be just a friend with benefits... nor have i found one that was open minded. As a provider i get to explore.. i get passion... i get kinky... i get a wide variety of man meat... i get to meet new people... and the added perks. CANT get that with a civi.

[Lil Oral Annie]

Exactly, Lacy.

There is something addicting about the adrenaline rush, the excitement, the butterflies that I get when I'm about to meet someone new.. or even old friends. Especially old friends that I have a connection with. Can talk with and banter with.

And honestly, sometimes I think I want a relationship, but then when I try, I'm kinda like.. "meh, this is for the birds" lol I love the hobby.

The variety of 'man meat' is good too. I don't think I'm meant for a FWB type thing.

So yeah, I'm adopting Traci's words: " My commitment issues are your ticket to guilt-free genuine affection and attention."

I think if I were to ever get into another relationship again, just not sure if I would miss the hobby or not, or if by some small miracle I could meet a guy who knows about the hobby and still lets me keep doing it. O' how greedy I am.

[Satyrrical]

I have had only one civie lover who thought that a guy who could pop more than once was a good thing. She turned out to be bat shit crazy in other aspects. Careful screening finds ASPs that are at least willing to put up with it. Some even think it's cool.

[ForumPoster]

Neither NSA nor P4P sex can't possibly compare to love making that is part of committed, loving, emotional, deeply cherished relationship .

We are talking about two completely incomparable things here. If I had to make a choice between being a provider and being in relationship like that I would walk away from providing in a heart beat.

Now, if you were to ask if I prefer P4P sex vs NSA civvie sex, P4P wins.

Lina

[AngeLisa]

So far no civie sex since I started in nov. as escort. At this point I haven't had any civie sex. But it's different because I don't wanna do it nd he thinks omg she is Wack. I honestly think I won't be good enough for civie sex. Lol I enjoy my hobby. These guys understand a girl just likes to have sex,be open-minded, fun.. I don't wanna be discussed with your friends I like to be a naughty secret.
If I seen a guy I hobby with in public I'm not obligated to Go speak... THIS IS THE LIFE

[Guest071313-5]

Of Course having an SO, my Civie bonks are very, very, limited. Providers speed up the process for me. Im super busy usually and all that romance, even though I do like that, take up so much time. Too bad there are very few Civie girls that want the same thing, a roll in the hay with no prolonged attachment. I love the emotional attachment/ feelings but time is not my friend . Plus I have lots of unfulfilled fantasies that would be hard to obtain in regular life without compromising my regular life.

B

[*GoddessDallas*]

I love a REAL attachment...someone who cares for me is INTOXICATING.
Making love with someone and feeling the adrenaline rush of being loved and made love to and sharing something special is heavenly beyond words.
A client is a client.

I have both.