Can Providers and Hobbyists be JUST FRIENDS?

[Guest062217]

OP - Yes....I can personally say that I am great friends with some of the providers I have met...We keep in touch, talk about life...how they/I am doing and we have grown to be very close friends even outside of "hobbying"...

[Muscleup]

Originally Posted by Slim.

Yes! Exactly. We are like your Walter White. And you are like the cartels. We provide you with what you need and ww both go our seperate ways. And as we all know from watching Breaking Bad, none of those guys became friends just because they were in the same business. It just can't happen. Period. Both parties will expected to be compensated for their time one way or another.

Even if something did progress, the relationship wouldn't be a healthy one. I feel like it would be hardfor the two to trust each other. No way in hell.

Finally! Genius. Couldn't have said it better myself. :-) But let me try. Ha!

Hobbiest and providers seem to have difficulty distinguishing between real and unreal, hobby world and real world. Don't mix combustible agents. It's tempting but foolhardy.

[Muscleup]

Originally Posted by SNL9933

OP - Yes....I can personally say that I am great friends with some of the providers I have met...We keep in touch, talk about life...how they/I am doing and we have grown to be very close friends even outside of "hobbying"...

You think that's real? If so, ya want to meet some time to discuss the purchase of some really cool beach front property in Arizona?

Stop paying them and see how solid that "friendship" becomes. LOL Please.

[Guest062217]

Originally Posted by Muscleup

You think that's real? If so, ya want to meet some time to discuss the purchase of some really cool beach front property in Arizona?

Stop paying them and see how solid that "friendship" becomes. LOL Please.

Actually...I don't pay them anything. My provider friends have come over to watch football games at my place, we have gone out for drinks or lunch and just hang out / bbq etc.. Like I said...friends just hanging out together...

I didn't say every provider..just some of them have become friends..

[Muscleup]

Originally Posted by SNL9933

Actually...I don't pay them anything. My provider friends have come over to watch football games at my place, we have gone out for drinks or lunch and just hang out / bbq etc.. Like I said...friends just hanging out together...

I didn't say every provider..just some of them have become friends..

I see. No disrespected intended. But what you discribe is rare indeed. But they are getting something from this. Not sure we are getting the complete story. Unusual circumstance.

It's an old story. Men - Women, Provider - comforter, Security - pleasure, money - sex. The hobby-provider relationship is not complex and is as old as human existence. "There is nothing new under the sun." Ecclesiastes 1:9

[Guest062217]

Originally Posted by Muscleup

I see. No disrespected intended. But what you discribe is rare indeed. But they are getting something from this. Not sure we are getting the complete story. Unusual circumstance.

It's an old story. Men - Women, Provider - comforter, Security - pleasure, money - sex. The hobby-provider relationship is not complex and is as old as human existence. "There is nothing new under the sun." Ecclesiastes 1:9

No disrespect taken.. I get it and yeah it's hard to believe. I've met plenty of providers over the years and I would say I have only made true friends with 4 of them..and those 4 I don't hobby with any longer because we are now just friends..

We all know how this works...some providers are very personable and others are very 'business' like. My rule of thumb is this....I treat providers as if they were a girl I met in RW....Respectful, listen to her, respect her boundaries and quietly think to myself..."I wonder how good she is in bed?"...only with providers I know it's going to happen...

It's the "new-ness" or "strange" of meeting a girl / provider for the very first time that is my drug....

[Prolongus]

For the guys and girls having trouble grasping this Provider/client "friends" concept...I can tell you it absolutely DOES happen...I've had a few myself. In those situations, it was the girls who initiated it through texts, invitations to hang out, etc. And I've known several guys that have Providers as friends.

This place is loaded with mythical stereotypes of who we're supposed to be, how to act, what to do, what to say, what to post and what to believe.

[Muscleup]

Originally Posted by Prolongus

For the guys and girls having trouble grasping this Provider/client "friends" concept...I can tell you it absolutely DOES happen...I've had a few myself. In those situations, it was the girls who initiated it through texts, invitations to hang out, etc. And I've known several guys that have Providers as friends.

This place is loaded with mythical stereotypes of who we're supposed to be, how to act, what to do, what to say, what to post and what to believe.

Thank you Pro.

I guess from my perspective it seems impossible. I would not go there even if I wanted. Something I would never do. However, as described by SNL, its a very believable and workable scenario.

[Muscleup]

Originally Posted by SNL9933

No disrespect taken.. I get it and yeah it's hard to believe. I've met plenty of providers over the years and I would say I have only made true friends with 4 of them..and those 4 I don't hobby with any longer because we are now just friends..

We all know how this works...some providers are very personable and others are very 'business' like. My rule of thumb is this....I treat providers as if they were a girl I met in RW....Respectful, listen to her, respect her boundaries and quietly think to myself..."I wonder how good she is in bed?"...only with providers I know it's going to happen...

It's the "new-ness" or "strange" of meeting a girl / provider for the very first time that is my drug....

That makes sense. But the friends thing with a provider it's not for me. I have not been remotely interested in anything besides that hour of escape with a beautiful woman. Matter of fact, I get a little concerned when they contact me out of the blue for any reason. I'm friendly but don't require much friendship. Got all the friends I need and both of them are about to drive me crazy. (HA)

You got that right, Pal. This is just like a highly addictive drug. For me, it's the slight hint of danger and the excitement of knowing sex is going to happen with this beautiful woman you just met. It's irresistible.

[DallasRain]

Originally Posted by Prolongus

To answer your question Slim..., yes, they can be friends.

Ditto...if there is a connection you can be both...i have several

[Kendall4U]

I think they can if there is a mutual respect just like any RW friendships. Feelings tend to develop sometimes whether you want them to or not. Just part of being a human. We are all wired to connect on some level. As I have said before, treat others as you want to be treated. If they can't return your efforts, then walk away.

[Sir Lancehernot]

You want to test the belief that she's your friend? Tell her you're unemployed. That'll introduce a reality check real fast.

[Prolongus]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

You want to test the belief that she's your friend? Tell her you're unemployed. That'll introduce a reality check real fast.

Sir Lance...I'm thinking you don't have any Provider friends. I'm not implying you're unemployed, either. Or maybe you were friends and you told her you don't have a job. Which means...y'all really weren't friends. The Provider friends I had never asked me for a dime.

One more thing...we rarely ever talked about the hobby, either.

[MaxiMilyen]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

You want to test the belief that she's your friend? Tell her you're unemployed. That'll introduce a reality check real fast.

That's a shame. Not sure what the whole story is but, I have questions...

How supportive have your other "friends" been about your job loss? Have they rushed to your side? Offered to be your rock? What about your ex-colleagues? Are they coming around offering moral support?

[LickHer]

One word... NO