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Rudyard K · 03-09-2010, 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WTF

Now that is the mature way to look at life!

We have no control over what others do. We have control of our actions! Taking responsibility over our own actions helps one celebrate life....not sitting around regretting doing something because someone did not live up to a preconceived notion!

There is no beauty in people living a regretful life!

First some humbleness when describing his golf game.

Now taking personal responsibility.

Our little WTF is growing up.

I'm so proud.

Katy Alexander · 03-09-2010, 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

Does it tear at your heart strings more if you're in a romantic relationship?

I know how I reacted to my ex-wife when I found out I was cuckolded by my (then) best friend. I never forgave her taking my love and trust and trashing it ever so publicly. I hated him, too, but not nearly as much as the ex.

When my father died, she sent a sympathy card, which I trashed.

My only consolation: she desperately wanted children; they never had any. Thought she got what she deserved.

I can understand feeling angry when it first happened, but it sounds like you have been angry for waay too long.For your own piece of mind you are much better off just letting it go. I think that Lynette said it best.It is so much healthier to learn from your past relationships than to let them eat you alive.

Back to the original topic. I think that giving a personal gift that is not well received is a lot like unrequited love.Just because a person can not return your feelings does not make what you feel any less real.The same thing goes for gifts if giving to another made you happy at that moment then there is nothing to regret.

Guest042611 · 03-09-2010, 07:43 PM

I've wished I hadn't received gifts sometimes, when I love the thing but not quite the person who gave it to me...

Fast Gunn · 03-09-2010, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Natalie

I've wished I hadn't received gifts sometimes, when I love the thing but not quite the person who gave it to me...

So what do you do when you love the thing, but not quite the person who gave it to you?

WTF · 03-09-2010, 08:03 PM

If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with!

Guest042611 · 03-09-2010, 11:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

So what do you do when you love the thing, but not quite the person who gave it to you?

If it's nice, I keep it!

But I guess I try to develop a different association with it somehow.

While in college, I dated a what-was-I-thinking sort of character. He and I visited a lot of nice restaurants together though, and when we broke up I was disappointed that every good eatery in San Francisco was tainted with my memory of him. So I made sure to go back to each one with my girl friends, so that they would sort of override the unpleasant memories of this guy.

I guess with objects it can be similar. I try to make them mean something different to me. For example, I received a beautiful dress as a birthday present from a lover whom I later cut off contact with. So I made sure to wear it a lot on my last trip to Las Vegas; now it reminds me of that trip more than the man who gave it to me.

Katy Alexander · 03-10-2010, 08:55 AM

I think that is a great way to take your life back.I once moved from SF to Winnipeg because I was in a painful relationship, and did not want to risk running in to him.Now Winnipeg has some of the nicest people, and I loved the nature that was near by , but god damn it gets cold there.I only lasted a few months, so when I returned to SF (fortunately frost bite free) I decided it was time to reclaim my home.

We had met at a beautiful area in Marin where I loved to mountain bike, so the first time I returned to that area I took something that he had given me, and threw it off the highest cliff.I may have mumbled a little curse when I did it lol.

After that the area felt like it was mine again.Even now I love to hike with Edward there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Natalie

If it's nice, I keep it!

But I guess I try to develop a different association with it somehow.

While in college, I dated a what-was-I-thinking sort of character. He and I visited a lot of nice restaurants together though, and when we broke up I was disappointed that every good eatery in San Francisco was tainted with my memory of him. So I made sure to go back to each one with my girl friends, so that they would sort of override the unpleasant memories of this guy.

I guess with objects it can be similar. I try to make them mean something different to me. For example, I received a beautiful dress as a birthday present from a lover whom I later cut off contact with. So I made sure to wear it a lot on my last trip to Las Vegas; now it reminds me of that trip more than the man who gave it to me.

Guest042611 · 03-10-2010, 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Becky

We had met at a beautiful area in Marin where I loved to mountain bike, so the first time I returned to that area I took something that he had given me, and threw it off the highest cliff.I may have mumbled a little curse when I did it lol.

Wow, dramatic! It sounds like a movie.

I wouldn't want my thoughts of Marin tainted either though, it's too beautiful of an area!

discreetgent · 03-10-2010, 11:33 AM

Brutal, ladies, brutal

Rudyard K · 03-10-2010, 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by discreetgent

Brutal, ladies, brutal

Yeah, I'd have probably just keyed their car. I guess I don't have much imagination.

Katy Alexander · 03-10-2010, 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by discreetgent

Brutal, ladies, brutal

Now brutal would have been if I threw the boyfriend off the cliff

Marcus Aurelius · 03-10-2010, 04:15 PM

In effigy isn't that what you did?

discreetgent · 03-10-2010, 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Becky

Now brutal would have been if I threw the boyfriend off the cliff

Touche'

Guest083011 · 03-10-2010, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Becky

Now brutal would have been if I threw the boyfriend off the cliff

As I read your post I was half expecting that outcome. But you prolly pushed him off the GGB before you got to Marin. With lunch in Sausalito in between.

Katy Alexander · 03-10-2010, 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius

In effigy isn't that what you did?

I had to go look up effigy I love this place I always learn new words here.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SR Only

As I read your post I was half expecting that outcome. But you prolly pushed him off the GGB before you got to Marin. With lunch in Sausalito in between.

No , I wouldn't do that . The GGB has too many cameras