Why do You Cheat?

[guest061212-1]

Alex, your blog post on the subject was wonderful and should be required reading for every spouse. It does go both ways.

While I never cheated on my wife when she was alive, I certainly did with my live in girlfriend of 2 years. She was exactly as you described and one of the reasons I agreed to a lateral move in my job that required traveling out of Pittsburgh.

I will add one cute tidbit and feel free to "borrow" it.

Confucius say: "Man who live in dog house soon too long soon find cat house!"

[roxiestarr]

Honestly I think it's just in our human nature to be polygamists. Haha!

[Marshall]

Originally Posted by ninasastri

that is true, but i did it because the usual norms of relationships did not appeal to me but disrespecting the norms of the majority of people appeals to youand i like the special intimacy special?of these encounters and want them in my private life as well (like that) and because of the money that comes wiht it, and the freedom.
a poly lifestyle is a lifestyle without commitment, intimacy or meaning...
But it is kind of logical that women get paid because the gents are married or can?t offer anything beyond a casual relationship.
women get paid because they are pursuing money to support themselves, not pursuing relationships
My first motivation was when i was 18 that because i was pretty and such, many men wanted to have me in bed and have sex wiht me, but no one, or not so many REALLY wanted me and a relationship where i can rely on and whatnot. when you can answer why this is so, you will become self-aware....a number of people know this answer but are too polite to tell you....if someone told you the truth, you would be angry and not believe the truth, so nobody will tell youANd i always was kind of a hippie with different attitudes for relationships, so i felt kind of exploited that no one wanted to share my relationship attitude (ok no one is an exxaggeration), but nevertheless all these mono-hypocrites wanted my sex.
I felt that everyone wanted "just sex" with me why did they always get sex from you? Did you ever say NO?and at one point i got so angry about all of these approaches (it was men much older and married and even one of my schoolteachers - who btw was a notorious skirt chaser and whatnot) that i decided IF someone just wanted to have sex with no strings attached an me being SILENT about it,
he MUST pay for that so at least i also get something out of it. I was working as model at that time and i kind of noticed all that screwing around on many occassions and i was kind of upset with it and found if i get treated like a prostitute then i at least choose it right away as profession.
Its easier than to "do" all the photographers and "VIP" s to get some lousy paid jobs as model (IF you get them)

Then occasionally i got a different attitude. Being an escort is also something that develops over time.
I don`t t hink anyone chooses it to "save" marriages, but if you are aware of what you are doing , what a marriage means sociologically speaking and why escorts even exist, it comes naturally.
Wives and whores coexist in patriarchy.

[Marcus Aurelius]

Marshall,

There is truth and then....you don't say "Yes, the dress makes your ass look huge."

I mean you don't give a cop the finger and then Jay walk.

[Marshall]

Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius

Marshall,

There is truth and then....you don't say "Yes, the dress makes your ass look huge."

You are correct. There is a lesson here for all of us. Maybe the truth isn't always a good thing and maybe hypocrisy isn't always hypocrisy.....

[NinaBrooke]

Marshall don`t interprete something into my words i never said. I said they "wanted" to have sex from me, and not they got it. Amongst these were married older men, and with me being 17 beginning 18 i found that ooutrageous at that time in my life that a married man would even approach me. I was not living in a life yet where such things were normal.

As i said i only dated ONE married man for a long time and other than that i only see married men in paid encounters.

With 18 i was not as sexually open as i was now and there were many things that DID disturb me. A lot actually. That is why i chose to become an escort, because hypocrisy was never my decision in life.

and again, just because something "was" that way when i was 18 does not mean it still is that way. People change, usually, except for you of course. And i give a rats ass what people like "you" and like you think about me and my relationship style. I pity the woman who has to put up with you, but i assume there is no one.

I am not one of these women who "fuck their way" up the career ladder. I could have, but i guess i am way too lazy to do that. I prefer things simple and my freedom.

But its usual that Marshall of course has to provoke.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Marshall

You are correct. There is a lesson here for all of us. Maybe the truth isn't always a good thing and maybe hypocrisy isn't always hypocrisy.....

whatever gets you thru the day ... and night... as long as you don`t poop in anyone elses party, no problem.

-.....a rose is a rose is a rose, yes??

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Marshall

Poly lifestyle is a lifestyle without commitmen and meaning? how would you know that? judgemental as usual. PROOF It, bring facts.

just because you have to lie and be a hypocrite does not mean you get away with pooping at other people`s parties.

But that is typical marshall not being able to discuss issues, but rather be judgemental and write braggadacious posts with NO content.

I recommend finding a hole in the wall and putting your dick in it - and fuck it hard, really hard!!!. Then smash your head against that same wall a few times. i heard from some conservative tea party member that this helps for some people getting their act together again :-). and it seems to me you have lost "it" quite a while ago.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius

Marshall,

There is truth and then....you don't say "Yes, the dress makes your ass look huge."

I mean you don't give a cop the finger and then Jay walk.

sure, i do that all the time. I hate it when my ass looks big and no one tells me.
Its outrageous

and i also find it outrageous when clients complement escorts without taste and tell them how attractive they are. its also outrageous. how would the poor girls learn anything? I like being criticised when its true. Recently many of my escort friends critizices my hairdo as too short, and i let it grow now and it does look a lot nicer for my face. If they had not told me i would have cut it bob-short for the rest of my life.

[Marcus Aurelius]

It's not really meant in the literal sense anymore. It's been used for so long now.
A metaphor.

Don't tell your truth just to bring harm or hurt.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius

It's not really meant in the literal sense anymore. It's been used for so long now.
A metaphor.

Don't tell your truth just to bring harm or hurt.

Ok i get it :-). True.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by JohnMacnab

Plain and simple. It just gets boring to have sex with the same woman for thirty years.

well if its so "plain and simple" then why would so many women be hurt by betrayal and why would so many people feel the need to lie? So i consider it can`t be so simple, because given the equation in a marriage at least ONE of the two does not think "its boring to have sex with the same person for 30 years" otherwise there would not be so much outrage about discovered affairs or things like that?

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by OliviaHoward

I personally believe this is the reason men stray. I tried to find the study, but couldn’t. Several years ago I read that 80% of all the white males in Europe were genetically linked to 10 different genetic lines. Apparently only the males can be traced because of the X chromosome. That’s a lot of seed to spread.

Why do women cheat? Just like men, a variety of reasons, but I believe it centers around security or raw sexual desire. I have read that when a woman is thinking sexually she will choose a good looking man and consider his social / financial status very little. If she is considering a man for any other reason, his social and financial status is paramount and looks are far down the list.

I agree with that. Given that fact there was another study conducted where they found that many women have cuckoo`s children and the fathers are not the real fathers.
The study was not intended to find that , it was intended for some other purpose but during the course of that study was found that a significant amount of children (25% but i am not sure of it) was NOT of the ones who thought to be the fathers. :-) (lol)

I think security vs. excitement and passion is the usual deal that keeps people married vs. cheating or lets them fall apart and together again. Marriage as an institution has been there to provide stability and to keep measures of insecurity (amour fous and extreme passion) out of it. There have been written books of how to be a proper husband and a proper wife, and all that (what is seen between escorts and clients or lovers and such) is considered inappropriate within the boundaries of marriage.

That also explains why the sexual desire goes down . But other styles of attachments grow and they contain stability and intimacy.
The raw sexual pleasures probably have place elsewhere where stability is not sought of nor an issue.

[skudd]

Listen... i tried to sum it up to you before. But really it all comes down to the pearls of wisdom that the Conan said so many centuries before, as he is the father of all cheaters.

This is the mantra for all evolved men. Ladies... listen and learn.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6PQ6335puOc


We cheat because we are pre-programed to. You can no more stop cheating then you can will your hair to turn another color. Think i am wrong? Try and stop... see how miserable you become, use whatever moral yoke you need but... oh yes.. you will start again after a good long try at abstaining.

[John Bull]

If a married provider cums on a paid date, did she cheat?