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09-17-2011, 05:56 PM
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#556
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title: for rent
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: ****
Posts: 4,333
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The Tombstone
In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer, so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone:
"Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin"
Not long after, the old maid died peacefully, and the undertaker told his men what the lady had said. The men went to carve it in, but as the lazy no- goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long.
They simply wrote: "Returned unopened"
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09-17-2011, 06:23 PM
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#557
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 12, 2009
Location: near Lake Ontario
Posts: 48,713
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"Returned unopened"
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09-17-2011, 06:40 PM
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#558
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 12, 2009
Location: near Lake Ontario
Posts: 48,713
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ok now looking for wt of a dick for the Spider hole but found
Among gay men
A study undertaken at Utrecht University found that the majority of homosexual men in the study regarded a large penis as ideal, and having one was linked to self esteem. [39] One study analysing the self-reported Kinsey data set found that homosexual men had statistically larger penises than their heterosexual counterparts. [40] One potential explanation given is a difference in the exposure to androgen hormones in the developing embryo. Evidence points towards men of each of these two orientations being equally likely to exaggerate the size of their penis. [41]
in
Human penis size - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_ penis_size - CachedSimilar
You +1'd this publicly. Undo
Circumcised men are on average 8 millimeters shorter in terms of erect .... In addition, a correlation between weight and height and penis length was also found. ...
Thinking of tigers last joke
That is not fucking fair dam it LOL
carry on
But it is good to see we both lie about it
edit: so GP in the Glory hole thread. your SAFE LOL
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09-17-2011, 06:55 PM
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#559
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 12, 2009
Location: near Lake Ontario
Posts: 48,713
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tiger
In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer, so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone:
"Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin"
Not long after, the old maid died peacefully, and the undertaker told his men what the lady had said. The men went to carve it in, but as the lazy no- goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long.
They simply wrote: "Returned unopened"
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Ya I was thinking of change that for a provider that likes little guys in the hole.
Provider fill in her name. liked little willy nilly's. And she was proud of it. On her tombstone she wanted
"Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin"
and that was really almost true. As most of her Virgina was virgin.
Many years later a undertaker read her wish. And told his men to make it so.The men went to carve it in, but as the lazy no- goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long.
They simply wrote: "Returned unopened"
Now that's a total lie. It was opened. Just most of it was unused to its full potential.
She a big girl !!! shall I do it????
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09-18-2011, 04:31 PM
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#560
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Account Disabled
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Holy crap!!be careful married men!! other men too probably...
A study has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: if she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with duct tape over his mouth and a spear lodged in his chest with a cricket bat up his arse while he is on fire. No further studies are expected on this subject.
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09-18-2011, 07:41 PM
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#561
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Oct 26, 2010
Location: some where south
Posts: 1,320
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lol i'm glad i didn't partake in that study group.
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09-23-2011, 07:03 PM
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#562
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 12, 2009
Location: near Lake Ontario
Posts: 48,713
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Time to log off. see what happens!
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09-24-2011, 11:19 PM
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#563
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 12, 2009
Location: near Lake Ontario
Posts: 48,713
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Quote
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09-25-2011, 12:46 AM
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#564
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 12, 2009
Location: near Lake Ontario
Posts: 48,713
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Attachment 79989
Doove found a avatar for ya
the White Knight Rubber Ducky
In case you need the pic
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09-25-2011, 07:32 AM
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#565
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 19, 2009
Location: Buffalo NY
Posts: 7,271
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Quote:
Originally Posted by offshoredrilling
Doove found a avatar for ya
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Awesome!
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09-25-2011, 10:56 AM
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#566
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title: for rent
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: ****
Posts: 4,333
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Sorry, couldn't resist.
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09-25-2011, 10:58 AM
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#567
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title: for rent
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: ****
Posts: 4,333
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Picking Up Chicks
A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The chicken runs to the farm but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's BMW back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives the car forward, saving him from sinking!
A few days later, the chicken and horse were playing in the meadow again and the chicken fell into the mud hole. The chicken yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched over the width of the hole and said, "Grab for my 'thingy' and pull yourself up."And the chicken did and pulled himself to safety. The moral of the story: If you're hung like a horse, you don't need a BMW to pick up chicks.
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09-25-2011, 12:43 PM
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#568
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 83274
Join Date: May 19, 2011
Location: Dallas Tx
Posts: 269
My ECCIE Reviews
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Well me personally I don't come up for air nut you can spank me anyway. LOL
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09-28-2011, 06:52 AM
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#569
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Account Disabled
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freaking wow!!
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09-29-2011, 02:13 PM
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#570
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Apr 14, 2010
Location: Cuse
Posts: 2,491
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