Seduction...Does Anyone Else Feel This Way?

[ZantannaParella]

So Is it possible, in y'all's opinion, for 2 people in here to have intense passionate sessions that may or may not go over the "time" agreed on and become close to keep that going for years without one of the people fall head over heals and want to be more and start a real relationship or want to date the other?

Is it even possible for 2 people who meet here or another site to see each other for years and have the passion and intense sessions and be friends in and outside the hobby ?

I don't know about y'all but I've meet some great guys in here that I actually care about as people and as friends,. not just "clients" and no. I am not taking about an obsessed stalker type situations. Am I expecting or waiting on a pretty woman senario to happen where I'm swept off my feet and we will live happily ever after?? No. But even if I didn't have another hobby type session, I would still keep in contact and hang out with em

Ok. Let the hate and critism start. Lol.

[Bankshot]

No criticism here ZP. I've gotten to know you pretty well and you always keep it real. Nothing fake about you.

[boardman]

Originally Posted by ZantannaParella

So Is it possible, in y'all's opinion, for 2 people in here to have intense passionate sessions that may or may not go over the "time" agreed on and become close to keep that going for years without one of the people fall head over heals and want to be more and start a real relationship or want to date the other?

Is it even possible for 2 people who meet here or another site to see each other for years and have the passion and intense sessions and be friends in and outside the hobby ?

I don't know about y'all but I've meet some great guys in here that I actually care about as people and as friends,. not just "clients" and no. I am not taking about an obsessed stalker type situations. Am I expecting or waiting on a pretty woman senario to happen where I'm swept off my feet and we will live happily ever after?? No. But even if I didn't have another hobby type session, I would still keep in contact and hang out with em

Ok. Let the hate and critism start. Lol.

I think it's possible. I've had one specific FWB where it was simply about us being able to give each other something we hadn't been able to find elsewhere. Mainly a mutual enthusiasm about exploring our sexual boundaries. We had some similar fantasies in which we actually partook but we also had different fantasies that we could openly discuss without judgement and we made those happen for each other as well. When you realize that which is "taboo" for you is someone else's real fantasy or even their normal you start to look at sex in a different way. I wouldn't say we were in love but over time there became an emotional attachment. It just felt good to be together when we had the chance. It ended when her SO changed jobs and moved them out of state. I hated that it ended but it wasn't devastating or anything like that.



Finding someone who accepts you for who you really are to the point that you can share it without fear of judgement or rejection is rare. Rejection, BTW, is fine as long as the other partner doesn't judge the reasons. We all like what we like. In a good relationship, if a person brings something up to their partner the partner has some options. They can say "that's something I have an interest in as well" or they can say "that's something I've never thought about but I'd be willing to consider it"(surprisingly this is the most common response in a healthy relationship, most people have preconceived ideas about what sex is and ypically don't think outside their own box but when challenged, and in a trusting relationship, they will usually expand their horizons.) The third response can be "I understand that this is something that you'd like to explore but it is totally out of my comfort zone".
The flip side of that in said healthy relationship is the partner doing the asking must be willing to accept any one of those three answers. If you don't get the answer you want, expressing disappointment is fine. Anything beyond that(starting shit over it) is not.


In a SO relationship, many times it can be terrifying to reveal certain things about oneself. For instance, one of the most often asked questions when it comes to swinging forums is, "how do I get my partner to start swinging?" By even asking that question it reveals that there is not a trust in their partner to reveal that desire without fear of a shitshorm...at minimum. A relationship that doesn't have that minimum amount of trust is probably not on stable ground.


In the hobby world mature, experienced providers have most likely "heard it all" from their clients so there's probably not a lot that surprises them. They are probably better equipped mentally to be able to deal with the question being asked and providing a non-judgemental response. Just look at the number of provider profiles that say they are open minded but they also state exactly what is off limits. A client might take that to mean anything else is at least up for discussion. I think that is probably attractive to a lot of clients.



Long winded as usual but I said all that to illustrate that I think it is possible to have a long standing provider-client relationship where there is intense passion but both know that there is a boundary that can't be crossed. Maturity is key. It happens in the civilian world all the time. Why couldn't it happen here?

[CurvyKatie]

I'm talking about the feeling of seduction in the moment, not falling in love.

Love is something that is very separate from having sex.

You can't go around falling in love with everyone you have sex with.

[boardman]

Originally Posted by CurvyKatie

You can't go around falling in love with everyone you have sex with.

....aaaaaanndd I think I just fell in love!

[Mr Willy]

Originally Posted by tyboy1

To me what Katie is describing is what I consider GFE to be. That's my kind of time spent with a lady.

I could not agree more. What she described is what older guys like myself want in a provider. They are few and far between.

[CurvyKatie]

Originally Posted by boardman

....aaaaaanndd I think I just fell in love!

Boardman is the exception. He breaks all the ladies hearts

[CurvyKatie]

Originally Posted by Mr Willy

I could not agree more. What she described is what older guys like myself want in a provider. They are few and far between.

Speaking of few and far between, so good to see you post Mr. Willy, a true gentleman and definitely one of the hottest older guys I have ever seen.

[ICU 812]

Originally Posted by boardman

/That's a fair expectation, and there's certainly nothing wrong with you wanting what you want, but how does that hot young woman make you feel the passionate energy you are looking for, illusion or not? What specifically does that look like?



The OP seems to be saying that in order to feel passionate she needs to work up to it with some seduction. She doesn't necessarily say she is the one who needs to be seduced rather her seducing someone can be just as effective. Lead the mind and the body will follow. I get that and feel the same way about it.



I've been met at the door and had a tongue down my throat as the provider was locking the door behind me. The passion was in, what appeared to be, her intense and immediate desire to have my cock down her throat next. Is that a turn on? Hell yeah it is.

I've also had sessions where the passion was built more deliberately with conversation, some wine, touching, exploring. Building up that way has it's own intensity. I don't think it necessarily has to end with any expectations of further communication either way.
Since, for me, variety is the spice of life and the hobby I appreciate experiencing different forms of passion and seduction.

OK, I get it now.

For me, the "GFE" session includes conversation and fore-play. Kissing and caressing while ndressing each other . . .that sort of thing. Nice music (interpretable) and so on. That is why I prefer sessions no shorter than 90 min, and preferably longer.

I am not looking for a bargan short time where all I am expected to do is "juper-n-pumpher.

[ZantannaParella]

Originally Posted by boardman

I think it's possible. I've had one specific FWB where it was simply about us being able to give each other something we hadn't been able to find elsewhere. Mainly a mutual enthusiasm about exploring our sexual boundaries. We had some similar fantasies in which we actually partook but we also had different fantasies that we could openly discuss without judgement and we made those happen for each other as well. When you realize that which is "taboo" for you is someone else's real fantasy or even their normal you start to look at sex in a different way. I wouldn't say we were in love but over time there became an emotional attachment. It just felt good to be together when we had the chance. It ended when her SO changed jobs and moved them out of state. I hated that it ended but it wasn't devastating or anything like that.



Finding someone who accepts you for who you really are to the point that you can share it without fear of judgement or rejection is rare. Rejection, BTW, is fine as long as the other partner doesn't judge the reasons. We all like what we like. In a good relationship, if a person brings something up to their partner the partner has some options. They can say "that's something I have an interest in as well" or they can say "that's something I've never thought about but I'd be willing to consider it"(surprisingly this is the most common response in a healthy relationship, most people have preconceived ideas about what sex is and ypically don't think outside their own box but when challenged, and in a trusting relationship, they will usually expand their horizons.) The third response can be "I understand that this is something that you'd like to explore but it is totally out of my comfort zone".
The flip side of that in said healthy relationship is the partner doing the asking must be willing to accept any one of those three answers. If you don't get the answer you want, expressing disappointment is fine. Anything beyond that(starting shit over it) is not.


In a SO relationship, many times it can be terrifying to reveal certain things about oneself. For instance, one of the most often asked questions when it comes to swinging forums is, "how do I get my partner to start swinging?" By even asking that question it reveals that there is not a trust in their partner to reveal that desire without fear of a shitshorm...at minimum. A relationship that doesn't have that minimum amount of trust is probably not on stable ground.


In the hobby world mature, experienced providers have most likely "heard it all" from their clients so there's probably not a lot that surprises them. They are probably better equipped mentally to be able to deal with the question being asked and providing a non-judgemental response. Just look at the number of provider profiles that say they are open minded but they also state exactly what is off limits. A client might take that to mean anything else is at least up for discussion. I think that is probably attractive to a lot of clients.



Long winded as usual but I said all that to illustrate that I think it is possible to have a long standing provider-client relationship where there is intense passion but both know that there is a boundary that can't be crossed. Maturity is key. It happens in the civilian world all the time. Why couldn't it happen here?

I agree. I have been fortunate in the people I have seen. Only one bad experience and it didn’t Escalade. I didn’t like the way he talked And treated me so I asked (ok told what Eva) him to leave. He than used me as a ref. Wtf people are dumb. Most of the people I see are long term that I have come to know really well Some even years. To me it’s safer. The sex is better because you know each other’s bodies and what gets them going. You develop mutual trust and aren’t afraid to ask to try new things cuz you won’t feel judged. It’s respect for each other and their boundaries.
I don’t see many new people anymore. When I do I try to talk and get to know them initially ( and inquire about their fav sports teams cuz their are certain fans I will refuse to see based on integrity and the ewwweee factor :-)) than I let them know upfront what to expect from me and if that's not what they are looking for than no harm no foul and no time wasted. I personally like seeing people I have a personal connection with. No. It doesn't happen over night but when you find it makes for some fun says and nights

[Randall Creed]

Originally Posted by CurvyKatie

I'm talking about the feeling of seduction in the moment, not falling in love.

Love is something that is very separate from having sex.

You can't go around falling in love with everyone you have sex with.

I knew what you meant(I think). The touchy, flirty stuff, maybe a lil neck nuzzling, things you do before you get down to business. Some massaging, teasing, copping lil feels (I love palming a BIG OL' ROUND ASS through some silky panties), a soft grind so she can do a 'wood' check. Having a provider sit in your lap. Can't even remember the last time THAT happened. When you do get started, there's some mutual undressing. This can all be done with some small talk, or while you're looking out of the window from the 15th floor.

A lot of this has disappeared from the hobby, and it takes away from the experience. Some of it has become a blurry bore now, unfortunately.