Quote:
Originally Posted by discreetgent
We will agree to disagree on this.
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It depends. I had to go thru this once too. I was with a man who said he has no problem with escorts, but in reality he did all to keep me away from others. Sometimes the prejudices are not so aware to peoples consciousness. Sometimes the escorts are not even out about their jobs themselves, so why would a man respect something they don`t even respect themselves.
That said, my experience differed on that subject too. I had a 7 year long relationship with a 30 year older man when i was 18 and we are still great friends , but he required i give up my job so i can be his official girlfriend. He always dated escorts, he says he rather has a fight with an escort than a regular conversation with an ordinary woman, because all ordinary women thing about is marriage and kids and it bores him, or they want to get him to marry them and make them kids and that annoys him too. Escorts usually are more intellectual and interesting. So i was - together with another woman - his official girlfriend. He is an attorney so he wanted me to stop this work for his reputation. Even though everyone could have guessed where we got to know each other from its a little different to do this job and eventually encounter his collegues. BEsides he simply did not want me to do that job while i was wiht him and he paifd me for giving the job up. I did so. He took care of me and was quite authentic . I learned the most from him, he shaped my personality like no other.
Then i dated a married guy with whom evrything was perfect, until he chose to tell his wife about me. Long story short - the insults and stuff i had to endure going thru this turmoils is something that has hurt me beyond belief and i was seriously questioning who the guy was i shared so many years with. He claimed to be tolerant, but he wasn`t really. It all came up when his wife began to judge me and he defended her and even told her stuff about me to make her feel better. So in this regard i agree that a whore is only a whore for some. I regret i did not let him pay for me, because no matter what happened, i was always just the whore in all conversation. He told his wife that with me it was "just sex" even though he told me he loved me (and numerous other escorts too who he banged fro free and still does) and i was seriously hurt, because if it was "just sex" then why not keep a paid arrangement?
Of course his wife knew he loved me too, but still, the fact that he even used my work to explain our relationship AND degrade me in front of her to make her feel better shows - that a whore will always be just a whore.
I really felt like the most stupid dumbass for not charging a typical client that tells others it was "just sex" with me to get his ass out of marital troubles. There is nothing more derogatory to date an escort for free, claiming to love her and then tell others its just sex - Hell yeah! I mean taht is THE ultimate insult! BEcause if it was just sex, i would not have fucked him for free for so many years and whatnot, right?? So he insulted me on two levels: the love level and the intimacy level. ANd he insulted my work ethics too, by making me look like a stupid hooker for banging him for free.
That said, i am going to say one thing and i don`t mean that dergatory or offensive: Our clients come from a burgeouise level that does not allow them certain freedoms mostly plus they are married mostly (the occasional bohemien like my first ex aside, but they are rare) so that is why they engage in hiring escorts - which is ok, so no judgement there. But - it all can turn like hell when you get outside that context, because of that burgeoisie. I have only dated ONE married men (unlike other s i am not a sucker for being a dirty secret) and that has taught me a lesson i will never forget. Given that, i don`t understand why some women date married men continously and never learn their lesson and suffer a lack of self esteem with it. I was polyamorous so i though the fact that he was married is not my problem, but he made his marriage my issue and even when we were "out" as a couple officially he would not introduce me to his friends and whatnot. Never ever again.