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Old 05-02-2015, 05:57 AM   #31
seanj317
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I'd want to know. If I did something in the past and it caused a bad rep, I would want to fix it! I am a gentleman and would never intentionally do something to break my reputation. Plus what if I smell bad or am too hairy??? damn I'm self focused!
Anyway, yes if I was rejected, I would want to know so I could fix what's broke.
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Old 05-02-2015, 10:03 AM   #32
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Yes absolutely. I had one turn me down because "we weren't a match". What the hell does that mean particularly since the extent of our communications were me asking for an appt and her response. I would like the opportunity to clear up any misunderstanding.
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Old 05-02-2015, 11:19 AM   #33
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I could actually care less as to why. Nothing that goes on here has any meaning impact on my life, so I try not to take anybody or anything to seriously in this hobby. I look at being turned down as one less opportunity for me to get into any kind of trouble, or possibly waste my money.
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Old 05-02-2015, 04:46 PM   #34
Duthgar1976
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yeah i would like to know so that i can correct any mistakes made by me or squash any rumors or whatever it is, if it is because im fat or fugly tell me. Yes it can be ego killing but sometimes its good to know why you were rejected.
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Old 05-02-2015, 06:24 PM   #35
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Golden Man View Post
I could actually care less as to why. Nothing that goes on here has any meaning impact on my life, so I try not to take anybody or anything to seriously in this hobby. I look at being turned down as one less opportunity for me to get into any kind of trouble, or possibly waste my money.
+1
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Old 05-02-2015, 07:00 PM   #36
Barrymccockinner
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alaine View Post
"If you can't bring yourself to tell me, just lie and say that you heard that my dick was too big. That will at least make my ego flare up for a second."

Candidate for post of the year.

PERFECT ego boosting reply! Love it!

Could not have said it better.
Umm, no, not really. Then I'd know she was lying.

Personally, yes, I'd want to know. But I don't see what a provider has to gain by being honest if there are concerns about the hobbyist. If it's a personal issue with the provider (time of month, busy with personal life, etc), I don't see it as being turned down, just not available during that time. That's all that needs to be said, IMO. If a hobbyist is willing and available later on, then that's not "being turned don".
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Old 05-02-2015, 07:08 PM   #37
Zhivago52
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Having hobbied many years, it happens. The explanation doesn't really matter; it's best just to move on and let it go. If the provider is sincere, a rain check perhaps should be offered.
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Old 05-03-2015, 07:33 AM   #38
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Baby girl, Don't waste your precious time trying to explain yourself. You owe no explanation to anyone.
The only thing you'll get back is: you're wrong/confused/dumb/don't know what's right for your own body etc..
They never just accept it. And with stalkers, the more you say no.. The more they have to see you.
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Old 05-03-2015, 07:40 AM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by txexetoo View Post
Yes absolutely. I had one turn me down because "we weren't a match". What the hell does that mean particularly since the extent of our communications were me asking for an appt and her response. I would like the opportunity to clear up any misunderstanding.
I assume it has to do with your posts on this board. I would say the same..its a bit difficult to "clear up any misunderstandings" of years worth of negative posts not saying you have negative posts.. Just saying.. If you feel the need to sound off on every single current event etc.. My advice is to start a blog, start a FB, do it on Twitter.
This is not the place. I know I look at every single post/review that you've ever posted before I decide. ��
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Old 05-03-2015, 08:24 AM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maggie_May View Post
Baby girl, Don't waste your precious time trying to explain yourself. You owe no explanation to anyone.
The only thing you'll get back is: you're wrong/confused/dumb/don't know what's right for your own body etc..
They never just accept it.
And with stalkers, the more you say no.. The more they have to see you.
You hit the nail on the head with that statement. When you get asked why you did/did not do something or wants you to explain what you mean when you say/post something or someone says something about you, even if you know you are in the right, it is best just to ignore it and move on. Especially when it comes to your haters, as nothing you say will appease them.

When a provider turns a hobbyist down for a session, then shrug it off and move on to the next, there are so many providers here in the D/FW metroplex alone that you should not have a problem finding Ms. Next. The provider who turned you down for a session does not have to tell you why and I would not ask, as sometimes all that will do is stir up resentment/animosity that you might in turn give off an attitude towards the provider in your next session. Just say OK and move on.

MOST providers are looking for repeat regulars and when you find one that you make multiple return visits to see, providers do look at the review threads and talk to each other about hobbyists, so write those reviews and treat the providers you do see for sessions well, maybe even going that extra mile to make a good impression. The one or more who turned you down may be kicking themselves, especially if they relied on second+ hand/hearsay info about a hobbyist making a decision heavily based on that criteria to turn you down for a session. She may eventually contact you in the future to see if you are still interested in seeing her (that is why it is good idea to keep notes on all providers you have contacted and had interactions with), giving you a lame excuse that she hopes you buy for initially turning you down, then you can turn her down!
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:13 AM   #41
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Quote:
Originally Posted by davidfree986 View Post
You hit the nail on the head with that statement. When you get asked why you did/did not do something or wants you to explain what you mean when you say/post something or someone says something about you, even if you know you are in the right, it is best just to ignore it and move on. Especially when it comes to your haters, as nothing you say will appease them.

When a provider turns a hobbyist down for a session, then shrug it off and move on to the next, there are so many providers here in the D/FW metroplex alone that you should not have a problem finding Ms. Next. The provider who turned you down for a session does not have to tell you why and I would not ask, as sometimes all that will do is stir up resentment/animosity that you might in turn give off an attitude towards the provider in your next session. Just say OK and move on.

MOST providers are looking for repeat regulars and when you find one that you make multiple return visits to see, providers do look at the review threads and talk to each other about hobbyists, so write those reviews and treat the providers you do see for sessions good. The one or more who turned you down may be kicking themselves, especially if they relied on second+ hand/hearsay info about a hobbyist making a decision heavily based on that criteria to turn you down for a session. She may eventually contact you in the future to see if you are still interested in seeing her (that is why it is good idea to keep notes on providers you have contacted), giving you a lame excuse that she hopes you buy for turning you down, then you can turn her down!

Thank you! What a refreshing point of view!
We as women/providers are taught to over-explain, to over-apologize.. To smooth things over.. To take on another persons baggage. It's not our place to make you feel ok. And to constantly try to make everyone feel ok is not healthy. And it's not good for your soul.
One last word:
Don't do anything for someone that they won't do for you.
Example: do I demand an explanation each time a hobbyist looks at my photos/rates/past posts/reviews and decide to pass? No, I do not.
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:33 AM   #42
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I have had ladies tell me that they wouldn't be able to handle the 2 inches I'm packing for the full 3 minutes that I could give them. It would be too much for them. It sucks being turned down, but the flattery was nice to hear.
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Old 05-03-2015, 04:39 PM   #43
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Let him know, why beat around the bush.
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Old 05-03-2015, 05:21 PM   #44
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I've had someone literally comment on my reviews, pm AND email my doubles partner, call me incessantly and wonder why I wouldn't see him. If you're pushy over the phone and won't take no as an answer I definitely don't want you in my personal space!
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Old 05-03-2015, 05:36 PM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by seanj317 View Post
I'd want to know. If I did something in the past and it caused a bad rep, I would want to fix it! I am a gentleman and would never intentionally do something to break my reputation. Plus what if I smell bad or am too hairy??? damn I'm self focused!
Anyway, yes if I was rejected, I would want to know so I could fix what's broke.
+1

how do you know how to fix a problem or an issue that maybe happening if you aren't told about it?

there are times when i have heard from providers, oh we just don't fit? or we aren't a good match? how is that possible since we have never met? bc of stuff other girls have said? if you believe any and every thing you hear/read i got some ocean front property in Arizona for sale.
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