Quote:
Originally Posted by Old-T
Sorry, that does not follow in the least.
Day 1: I just meet a lady, I think she is interesting and I decide I might want to find out a bit more about her. I am willing to invest my time, money, and energy for tickets to a movie and dinner afterwards. But if she tells me she is an escort--or tells me her two sisters have terminal cancer, or that she just lost her job--I may decide THAT amount of emotional energy is more than I'm willing to invest in a stranger.
Now forward ahead several months or more into the relationship. The first date went well. It was followed by several more. I got to know more about her, and I decide I really like what I have seen. NOW she tells me any of those things and I am very likely to see it in a very different light--and respond very differently because--based upon what I know about the lady, I now AM willing to invest a lot more than I was when she was a stranger.
Been there, done that. With several people who I let into my inner circle. No, not all escorts and not all people I was falling in love with, but people who had become very close and THEN serious issues came up. Personally I think it is a very natural, human responce.
In this case, the hadr part is to tell that pivot pont--too early and she would chase the guy away. Too late and he may feel deceived. But your view that intimate issues can all be discussed from day one is--in my opinion--not the reality of human nature for most people.
|
Maybe for you, not for me, I'm always upfront with any lady I want to get to know, so there is not any misunderstandings or surprises whatsoever, if they can't handle it, no problem, no love lost, but this is one thing I know and seen a lot of ladies do this, and they will dump you if they find out something down the line about you if it's something they really don't or wouldn't want to deal with, yeah they may try at first but eventually they'll come to regret it, not all mind you, but alot will.
And yeah I have ended relationships with ladies who were not upfront with me, I prefer not to fall in love with a false picture, for me if she told me she was a escort upfront I would be more accepting of it then 6 months later she tells me that, in fact I would be really pissed off.
And no not from day one, but at the time you decide you want to have a relationship, before you have emotionally invested in this person. it seems you'll rather wait until you're invested before hearing the down and dirty. i'm not wired that way, but if it works for you go for it.
But you know I really didn't start this thread to debate with a guy, you were the very first person to reply to this thread, giving the female rationale ..really!!
I wanted the female POV, really I wasn't even interested in what any guy felt, if I did I would have worded it as such, that's why it was address to the ladies,
don't mind if you want to add some input, but your thoughts are moot for me since you're not a provider.