Quote:
Originally Posted by zont
So..... when I want to see Lady A, who wants a reference from Ladies B and C before she will see me, I need to be sure that the phone numbers for Ladies B and C are published before I give the numbers to Lady A. In addition, I also try to see what contact method Ladies B and C prefer and give that to Lady A also. If Lady B or Lady C wants email only and she is not real quick about responding.... well, Lady A and I may not get to see each other. The guys (especially) can just move on to the next one.
Lady A may or may not choose to use what I give her because she may prefer to use her own trusted resources to figure out how to contact Ladies B and C. She is checking to see if I might be a bad guy, right? Bad guys have been known to give out phony contact numbers to trusted feminine accomplices or "co-workers" (  )..... I do not think that this is high on the list of ways to beat the system, but it is in there somewhere.
I have screwed this up before. I gave out a phone number of a lady to another lady so I could be screened, only to get blasted for handing out a number that I should not have handed out. Silly me - thought the ladies cooperated - well not that time. Learned the hard way.
It is reeeeeally hard to get this right all the time. P411 helps a lot, but, as many ladies have posted, relying only on P411 will not get it done either.
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zont, I hope you've learned from your mistake and use other methods now to get someone in contact with a provider. You should never give out another lady's or hobbyists phone #. Providers have many avenues to screen a lady. If their numbers are published, simply send a link to where it is published. If not, provide the providers handle and the lady you will like to see will track her down. Ladies on the board do cooperate for the most part; however, if I found out someone gave out my number, I would be pretty upset as well. If anyone ever asks me for someone's number, I always offer to pass their number onto the person they are trying to reach. I have quite a few ladies in my phonebook who have personally given me permission to call if I need a reference. I also try to keep track of the best way to contact providers. If a provider I don't know personally calls me with a reference, I will first ask them to PM me from their handle so I know the person I am speaking to is legit.
If you read this thread, you will see that my opinion is in the majority.
http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=366563
I also believe that it is against board rules to pass on personal information about another member, in my opinion, that includes unpublished phone numbers. Many providers blatantly say that the prefer phone as their method of contact. I always send a pm or email first and then call so they can quickly verify that I am legit. I NEVER use a phone # provided by a hobbyist. On many occassions, the providers number is incorrect, recently changed, or in lesser amounts - a fake reference. If I'm provided a phone #, I first research it to find out if it's their actual number. If I can't find their # on the site, then I just stick to pms and emails.
Not to hijack the thread but my fav was when I was new and a hobbyist provided me the providers phone number. She didn't answer but replied by text and said if I needed any other info, just text back. I saved her number. When the hobbyist called me on the day of my appt, it came back as the providers #!!! The idiot fake referenced me from his own phone! lol
