Good Client? Trick? Schmuck?

[pyramider]

He never answered my question.

[theboss21422]

like we all are tricks stop fooling yourself hobbyist

[PFCffff]

Originally Posted by pyramider

He never answered my question.

Originally Posted by pyramider

So describe her taint and we can supply the proper advice.

Her taint is so sweet, so delectable, so inspiring of passionate response, that when I kiss it, angels weep for joy. So there.

Originally Posted by pyramider

And so who is doing your wife if its not you?

No one. The combination of pain pills to reduce the suffering from a degenerative nerve disease, and anti depressants to treat the resulting depression have resulted in the chemical elimination of her libido. Not her fault, but after years of no sex, I began to harbor resentment.

Because of the option to explore my sexuality via "the hobby", I can continue to care and provide for her without resentment. You ladies should not take yourselves lightly. In my case, you've helped my marriage.

Old-T,

I especially appreciate your long, thoughtful, caring response. This ain't the kind of stuff you can discuss with most people you know. For a guy who was just paying for it, I was surprised at the feelings this activity can still evoke. And this one lady brings them out very strongly.

I know the rules for expressing feelings in a normal relationship, but this is new to me. She knows enough about me to know my situation. And even though she HAS shared some personal info with me during "pillow talk", I know and accept that any kind of relationship beyond "business" can never develop.

But, I now care for her enough that I care about her well being. I wish good things for her, and care about what happens to her. IS IT OK TO SAY THAT?

And if I am not at least pleasant for her to be around, I don't want her to have to go through the trouble of dealing with me.

Ok. Enough. Thanks to all for listening. You're better than a roomfull of bartenders.

[Guest081115-1]

#1 You're generous, kind, considerate, gentleman who love to treat a lady and showering her with your kindness

#2 She needs to appreciate things that you do for her without take things for granted.

not saying that she does.

You can have a meaningful mutual relationships from a client & provider as long as it's give and take are equally balanced.

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by PFCffff

No one. The combination of pain pills to reduce the suffering from a degenerative nerve disease, and anti depressants to treat the resulting depression have resulted in the chemical elimination of her libido. Not her fault, but after years of no sex, I began to harbor resentment.

Because of the option to explore my sexuality via "the hobby", I can continue to care and provide for her without resentment. You ladies should not take yourselves lightly. In my case, you've helped my marriage.

Old-T,

I especially appreciate your long, thoughtful, caring response. This ain't the kind of stuff you can discuss with most people you know. For a guy who was just paying for it, I was surprised at the feelings this activity can still evoke. And this one lady brings them out very strongly.

I know the rules for expressing feelings in a normal relationship, but this is new to me. She knows enough about me to know my situation. And even though she HAS shared some personal info with me during "pillow talk", I know and accept that any kind of relationship beyond "business" can never develop.

But, I now care for her enough that I care about her well being. I wish good things for her, and care about what happens to her. IS IT OK TO SAY THAT?

And if I am not at least pleasant for her to be around, I don't want her to have to go through the trouble of dealing with me.

Ok. Enough. Thanks to all for listening. You're better than a roomfull of bartenders.

Given what you have said, yes, it is completely OK to say that you care about her and what happens to her. Why in the world wouldn't it be? You have seen her a number of times in a very personal way. She has attended to both physical ways--and even more so emotional. You trusted her, you told her some very intimate, serious things about your situation, and I have to assume she replied in a kind and caring way--otherwise you would not be posting here now. That is, as you say, something not easy to find.

I have had similar encounters. It is near impossible not to care about the other person after something like that. I am going to spend the day tomorrow with a lady who has done similarly for two men--and yes, I am one of the two. It has been well over a decade and it has been a journey of many twists and turns. I will gladly exchange thoughts with you via PM if you wish, but not much more in the open here.

From what you describe I am very confident she does not see time spent with you as a chore. Quite the opposite, I am willing to wager a considerable sum that you really are someone she looks forward to seeing. When you run into a client who tells you emotionally wrenching things about themselves one of two things generally happens. If they are only a walking wallet you dump them because they aren't worth the "baggage". If you keep them it's because you don't see baggage, you see someone you care about who needs a hug.

[Laz]

Originally Posted by Old-T

From what you describe I am very confident she does not see time spent with you as a chore. Quite the opposite, I am willing to wager a considerable sum that you really are someone she looks forward to seeing. When you run into a client who tells you emotionally wrenching things about themselves one of two things generally happens. If they are only a walking wallet you dump them because they aren't worth the "baggage". If you keep them it's because you don't see baggage, you see someone you care about who needs a hug.

I choose to believe this is true. In the hobby you always wonder but I prefer to stay positive.

[Shayla]

I hate to sound bitter but this would raise red flags in my books. Not to say the guy is guilty of becoming "too involved" but I've had experiences that have crossed the line. It's not fun for either party.
I would probably make myself less available or clarify the 'relationship'.

[Old-T]

Shayla, I don't think you sound bitter. I think you reinforce my point. If a lady only saw the man as a business transaction she would see potential baggage and create space. The fact that she doesn't implies to me that she is comfortable with him and where the boundaries have moved for the two of them. I doubt she would react the same way with many of her other clients.

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by Laz

I choose to believe this is true. In the hobby you always wonder but I prefer to stay positive.

I think seeing Sonya on a regular basis would make anyone feel positive!

She is by far the best reason I can think of to live in Texas.

[happybanana]

True words of wisdom Old-T.... I especially like the first sentence in your last paragraph, regarding relationships. Wish I had known that early in my life. Thanks for taking the time to write this.

HB