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Old 02-19-2010, 04:55 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Exotic Lily View Post
I’m always asked by my clients about the differences we face in escorting as opposed to our Caucasian counterparts. Of course I tell them the general differences such as income/rates, advertising/marketing and location/demographics, but sometimes i’m still questioned further about my personal differences in the industry. I just wanted some positive (or negative) feedback as to…. why all the curiosity?
I'm going to guess it's Caucasian people doing the asking?

As someone who has been taught over and over by the "system" that I am born to a privileged class with a privileged history as a result of being blond and blue eyed, and of Catholic background, that I will bear the burden of a dark history of oppression, imperialism and slavery - I am indeed curious about the life experience of others. I wonder about their perspective, how the world has treated them.

Generally I do this through the study of culture and history. I don't like that people feel comfortable asking questions about my personal life if I haven't first broached it, and try not to do it myself. In my counseling training we were taught that it is not the burden of the minority, the oppressed or the victims to educate others. It is our duty to do our own learning in the sincere desire to understand.

Having had come from Eastern Europe and my family being of a traditional Catholic background, I have a particular fascination with Judaism. Learning about the history, cultural traditions, the faith itself absorbs me, and it's multifaceted and unique nature make it an endless learning experience. This gives me a much broader understanding of my own cultural background, and see the implications in the evolution of the Jeudeo-Christian societies.

I have never witnessed someone of Jewish background mistreated as a result of their heritage, yet those who have become friends have shared stories that leave me a bit stunned. It's easy for me to believe that such prejudice is a thing of the past, and such a false illusion isn't a good thing.

I guess part of the curiosity is wondering how much double standards or mistreatment or different experiences still exist in a supposedly politically correct bleached north American society. I wonder how much of it is still a facade.
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Old 02-19-2010, 05:33 PM   #17
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Maybe I am reading the same post differently than ya'll.

As a person that falls into the non-color color, I am well informed on my environment (culture, whatever) but I am always curious as to others environments to help me understand these friends of mine better. I was raised in a tiny town of Germanic descent and didn't even know an person other than my shade of skin until college. One of the things that I love when traveling (been to Africa, Central America, Caribbean, Soviet Union, and throughout western Europe - try to leave the country at least once a year), is meeting local people and experiencing their culture.

Having worked in the music industry, I can state that there are big differences between the experience of being at a blues concert where it is primarily attended by a black audience and one that is being attended by a white audience. No judgments, just have experienced it and know it to be true, figure it is a culture thing.

So if I had the opportunity to sit and talk with my "exotic" provider, I would be very interested in hearing if things were different for her. Natural curiosity. So unless I am reading the question wrong, isn't it natural for people to be curious of something outside of their own experience?

BTW, I love the feel of kissing a black woman...amazing.
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Old 02-19-2010, 08:38 PM   #18
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Interestingly, if a man won't see a provider of color, he just won't contact her. Yet, I have seen providers of all colors advertising they won't see black men. This to me would be more offensive to the men of color, because it is right out there in... black and white.

I won't see men of any color that don't know how to treat a lady. But, for the true gentlemen; I am color blind.

But, I was really surprised the first time I saw a black provider advertise no black men allowed.
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Old 02-19-2010, 09:15 PM   #19
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Didn't Camille have a very racist comment from someone trying to book her on aspd. I was shocked to read it. I just thought she was sexy. Color wasn't part of the equation. I enjoy talking to NB, or NIcholette from New England or Lauren from the Great White North (Canada). I just like talking to sexy women. (get a room......)
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Old 02-20-2010, 08:33 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rudyard K View Post
I have to be careful here because my thoughts are not bad (at least I don’t think them so), but my diplomacy is sometimes lacking…lol.

First, I would think the biggest problem for most of us would be “blending in”. It is hard enough to walk around with a really hot gal, with most of us guys being a lot more regular looking, and not draw attention to ourselves. Walk around with a really hot gal, where you are a salt and pepper couple, and your “blend in” factor was diminished. Maybe folks are “looking on” with prejudicial judgment. Maybe folks are “looking on” with envy. But it is my opinion, they are “looking on” more than with a non salt and pepper couple. And drawing attention to ourselves is not something a lot of us are comfortable with.

Much like I understand EL to be someone who likes to snow ski. Well, in most snow skiing venues a woman of color tends to get noticed more than a woman who is not. I think this is mostly because it is fairly rare on the slopes. Not bad…not good…just something one would notice more.

Second, there are a lot of really hot white gals. Likewise there are a lot of really hot gals of other ethnicities. But when they are really hot of another ethnicity…they somehow also are more likely to become exotic too. I think it is harder for a white gal to be exotic. So now the guy is going to have to walk around with a really hot gal who is exotic too. Now EVERYBODY is gonna be looking…lol.

I don’t think all the SW comparisons have much of anything to do with the gals in here. There are books written about the economic differences between the ethnicities…and opinions are as varied as there are books. A woman of class is still a woman of class…no matter what her ethnicity. I would think there are many other variables (other than some prejudice) that pose some difficulties. The above are just a couple.

None of that is a solution to anything. But it might explain at least part of the difficulties the ethnic gals have to deal with.
You're absolutely right.

And, yes I would presume that because of the salt and pepper stereotyping, a lot of gentlemen would be leery of being seen in "public" so-to-speak with a woman of color or one that's exotic, rather than her counterpart.

Majority of the clients that I do see are in fact Caucasian men, all of whom I'm humbly blessed to have crossed paths with. Half of that majority are repeat clients, and they look beyond the "color" spectrum of the P4P world and focus more on the person that I am, the person that they are when they're with me, and the experience I provide while we're together.

Like with most things in life, I take the good with the bad and surround myself with positive influences, so as to not succumb to bull$hit.
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Old 02-20-2010, 08:37 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill View Post
I'm going to guess it's Caucasian people doing the asking?

As someone who has been taught over and over by the "system" that I am born to a privileged class with a privileged history as a result of being blond and blue eyed, and of Catholic background, that I will bear the burden of a dark history of oppression, imperialism and slavery - I am indeed curious about the life experience of others. I wonder about their perspective, how the world has treated them.

Generally I do this through the study of culture and history. I don't like that people feel comfortable asking questions about my personal life if I haven't first broached it, and try not to do it myself. In my counseling training we were taught that it is not the burden of the minority, the oppressed or the victims to educate others. It is our duty to do our own learning in the sincere desire to understand.

Having had come from Eastern Europe and my family being of a traditional Catholic background, I have a particular fascination with Judaism. Learning about the history, cultural traditions, the faith itself absorbs me, and it's multifaceted and unique nature make it an endless learning experience. This gives me a much broader understanding of my own cultural background, and see the implications in the evolution of the Jeudeo-Christian societies.

I have never witnessed someone of Jewish background mistreated as a result of their heritage, yet those who have become friends have shared stories that leave me a bit stunned. It's easy for me to believe that such prejudice is a thing of the past, and such a false illusion isn't a good thing.

I guess part of the curiosity is wondering how much double standards or mistreatment or different experiences still exist in a supposedly politically correct bleached north American society. I wonder how much of it is still a facade.
Yikes, Lauren.

You're about to open up a different can of worms...
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Old 02-20-2010, 08:52 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NicholetteM View Post
Yikes, Lauren.

You're about to open up a different can of worms...
I'd agree with that.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill View Post

I guess part of the curiosity is wondering how much double standards or mistreatment or different experiences still exist in a supposedly politically correct bleached north American society. I wonder how much of it is still a facade.
It is all a facade. Nobody can tell the truth. If you do people cry ban.

Double standard abound. I will not rehash.

In a chapter of M Gladwell 'Outliners' he addresses this in the heritage of slightly different skin colors of his ancestors from Jamaica.
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Old 02-20-2010, 10:13 AM   #23
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When I lived in Minneapolis there were mixed couples everywhere.
How is it in Europe?
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Old 02-20-2010, 10:29 AM   #24
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Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius View Post
When I lived in Minneapolis there were mixed couples everywhere.
How is it in Europe?
had em in NYC in the 70's

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCi9MNS5y1A"]YouTube- The Jeffersons - A Friend In Need Part 2 of 3[/ame]
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Old 02-20-2010, 11:01 AM   #25
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How is it in Europe?
During the NHL lockout (2004/5 I think) Russian fans threw bananas on the ice at Anson Carter; a black player.

In Germany a few years ago (2005/6), we were refused service in a café in Mainz because on of my colleagues was black.
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Old 02-20-2010, 01:28 PM   #26
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Interesting Thread...

As someone who works in corporate america, 70 percent of the people I work with are white. 80 percent of my clients are white. I find that I have much in common with them. I can't tell how may times, some balck people have told m I don't speak "black" etc. I've always been the way I am. Let's not even mention the many times I am told how articulate I am. I am in Sales for god sakes and my income depends on convincing others that my product will make their life better.

I do think that people seek out those who they fantasize about. We do what has been in our fantasy structure. We are who we are.

I have encountered some ladies that told me that I would never get what I ask for. They have been brainwashed to believe that they are not worth the same as others. I get what is listed then some.

I do think that some things are more accepted in bigger cities and not so much in small towns.

Unfortunatley there are people in this world who feel that we should not blend the races. But when we look at the differences between the races, it is less than 1 percent.
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Old 02-21-2010, 08:36 AM   #27
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Default Don't Cheat Yourself.

I was a bit apprehensive to respond to this thread but decided that the more knowledge that is out there about DIFFERENCES the smarter we all may become. Ignorance is as blissfull as eatting an ice cream on a cone upside down.

Yes, there are working girls of ALL colors that chose to follow the fast moving current of this profession ---by doing so, they cause a tsunami like effect - which produces silly comments as "No blankity blank is worth blankity blank" ---speak for yourself (smile). My brain is the organ at play...


Yes, there are men that really enjoy the company of women from a different race of their own. Self consciousness and the assumption that EVERYONE is watching and wondering about the nature of the relationship can definitely be a deterrent. But why would one base their happiness on other peoples (strangers at that) assumption. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.

Yes, there is a portion of the market that does not favor women of color but are partial to blonde hair / blue eye types- but so what! The pie is sooo much bigger than what seems obvious.
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Old 02-21-2010, 09:30 AM   #28
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I believe Rudyard K meant that he doesn't care what people think, it's more that people would notice a mixed couple more and it's harder to blend with the crowd.

Quote:
The pie is sooo much bigger than what seems obvious
I confess I don't understand what you mean by this.
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Old 02-21-2010, 09:37 AM   #29
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As an ebony provider I will admit that I have had purely racist conversations with clients trying to barter. Once said my rates were too high and he could get a white girl for that much. I told him good luck. I am in an area where ebony providers are not thought very highly of and I am not sure why.

This has caused me to travel more and be more selective of local clients.
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Old 02-21-2010, 11:44 AM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius View Post

I confess I don't understand what you mean by this.
"This" is:
"The pie is sooo much bigger than what seems obvious."


Sorry my dear, I was thinking in my mother tongue...

Obvious, in the context of my post, relates only to as far as your eyes can see. I stand here in my naughty bits and proclaim -
"Shed away those glasses and have a look through my telescope" (smile)

What I mean is that there is so much more out there than meets the eyes.
One is only limited by there thoughts.

Having a specific preference is great; but it is unfair and shameful when those preferences are then used to form false generalizations against others ...(im getting dizzy ) tsk, tsk!

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