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12-17-2014, 11:09 AM
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#16
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Meet & Greet Organizer
Join Date: Dec 17, 2009
Location: "Hobbyverse"
Posts: 7,112
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'frustrated as an attached man who is completely neglected and ignored in the bedroom.'
says a lot to me.
First off, disregard the jerky replies; they are what they are.
eccie, of course, is not a "dating" site in the classic sense; its purpose is what it is -- p4p with zero attachments -- zero for those who understand the p4p universe, meaning, detached adventures and zero relationships resulting from any p4p. Of course, way too many in the hobby discover "friendships" and sometimes those become so close that folks get into relationships and then issues and then, well, all of that is well documented and no need to discourse here.
Second -- try and figure out what you are looking for in the "attachment" area. Obviously, for many good reasons, you are continuing in your RW relationship because you (and she, your s.o.) feel there is something worthwhile. In my case, having lasted more than 4 decades in a one-on-one relationship, I can say (and quite often do say) that 90 pct of what we have is pretty good. And that includes very sexless intimacy. The other 10 pct (meaning sexual stuff) is so minor to both of us that -- as long as I don't bring it home, I can and do get away with most anything I care to do outside the house, and within decent hours of the day so suspicions don't get raised and even hundreds of miles from the residential flagpole.
important -- consider discussing the home situation with the s.o. before attempting anything that might compromise your enduring relationship.
Consider, too, the possibility that couples counseling, even "sensual" or more so "sexual" counseling might be an avenue the two of you could explore. Togehter or apart. Strange as it might sound, during my extended military career, I have counseled individuals/couples on relationships, delving at times (when invited to offer such counsel) into their bedroom issues and offering humble advice on possible resources and possible avenues of exploration.
So, you need to figure out -- what parameters and limits -- you think you can get away with, afford(!) and then start processing some avenues of action. None of which will be very easy, very inexpensive, or totally sticky-less, imho.
Be very generous, for example, in setting a "a broad not a narrow target parameter" meaning age, size, attractiveness, education, ethnicity, etc. If you are looking for "some fun" without regret, imagine why any lady might be browsing or lightly shopping in any given establishment. Don't hover, just smile, maybe say "good morning" and then disengage a bit, but see what happens. A simple,"a cuppa coffee sounds right about now" or "I bought one of those last year" or "do you think the red or the blue whatever" looks better. I have also used "I'm considering garment for a birthday gift -- may I hold this garment up against you to estimate size or fit, since you and she (maybe spouse, but better my sister or mother or secretary) have the same look?"
-- plenty of "meat markets out there, even for old farts like me. But since most of the usual meat markets operate after afternoon tea time, certainly difficult to engage out of the house during MM operating hours, but, not impossible. And if you are a non-drinker, learn to imbibe less and nurse more. In Houston, gotta be dozens of potential MMs for every age group.
-- plenty of on-line resources, including the on-lines mentioned above and the telephonic "date-lines" advertised in your weekly alternative newspaper. But be aware that 1) YOU CAN BE TRAPPED OR TRICKED into compromising situations and 2) so many fakes out there, you will be mucho frustrated with the efforts.
-- plenty of in-person venues -- coffee shops, cafes, the grocery store, the jewelry store, Target, Foley's, etc.... where ladies of a certain age (hopefully your intended targets might be there). And, best if this particular establishment is well out of your neighborhood or your s.o.'s (and her friends who know you!) shopping patterns.
All that said, best of luck in your discovery process.
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12-20-2014, 11:31 AM
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#17
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Feb 24, 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 158
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It is amusing to see the responses that "they're all a waste of time/money" etc. Obviously that's true of some, not so much for others, but they didn't work for those who said that.
Anyway - CL is occasionally fruitful if you word your ad correctly - trying to get laid "free" probably is a waste of time (we ALL pay one way or another), but a well worded ad can lead to a "mutually beneficial" relationship that can cost more or less than dealing with traditional providers, but you might get more out of it in other ways.
My experience - signed up for SA for one month, have had BCD w/3 women ages 14 to 26 yrs younger than me, I can see 1 or 2 of them as often as I like, and it's been very cost-efficient. A couple others I'm corresponding with, might or might not come to anything. You have to put some time in and have some communication skills, but it's been great for me.
AFF I tried for a couple months - lots of inactive profiles, couples and (I'm sorry, it's true) ugly women there. I met one chick there, and believe it is a waste, overall (or was for me - YMMV).
Ashley Madison was a lot of UTR types and low response rate for me, but again, probably has worked for some. If the Sugar Baby forum still exists (I'm unclear on if it's gone at this point - I can't see it) - that is a wealth of information, and worth upgrading to premium for.
Good luck.
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12-20-2014, 08:14 PM
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#18
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El Hombre de la Mancha
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 46,370
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Try jewishsingles.com, those JAPs are a hoot.
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12-21-2014, 12:07 AM
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#19
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Gaining Momentum
Join Date: Jan 29, 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 51
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I've had good luck on:
fetlife.com
alt.com
twoo.com
datehookup.com
adultswithbenefits.com
hedonly.com
only because I'm hot (keep in shape), cute, friendly, polite and look 10 yrs younger than my age.
The best girls are on match.com but they want a ring.
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12-26-2014, 01:02 PM
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#20
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Feb 21, 2013
Location: US
Posts: 1,071
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in all seriousness if you are looking to hookup on the side and cheat on your wife why not just hit up a bar or club.
those hookup sites are probably 20 to 1 men to women ratio's and many of the females are not going to be appealing to you and vice versa. or just bite the bullet and get into hobbying and help out some of these nice ladies
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12-30-2014, 06:47 AM
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#21
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Aug 1, 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 216
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My best luck comes from SA.com, CL & AM (Fetlife was TOO freaky for me)
Like posted above I'm in great shape and have decent skills with the ladies.
Of course I also employ the powerful tool of getting away from the computer....
Nothing better than banging your waitress from a few hours ago in your car or the motel down the road...
Lots of good points in this thread
CL - learn to write a good ad and don't post your dick... have met 3+ long term FWB/FB off that site. All in great shape and 2 have their own place so no hotels... my favorite one dresses however I want and drives 1 hour to see me because her husband doesn't give her the time of day... she looks great for a 47 year old woman.
SA - depending on where you live can be a factor in a lot of things but over the years I lost track of the Sex from here... somehow pulled one girl as a FWB and have a 20 year old who has sex for free and conversation... is a good girl, just needs a friend.
AM - This site will be a pain but with 60$ and a little work I've landed 3-4 different FWB over the years. If a woman posts her face I usually just move on... discretion is key and thats not discreet..
Real World - Man this place is an oyster... grocery store, movie theater, restaurants, bars and more... have some confidence, dress nice and smell good and you will be amazed what a smile, compliment and a little conversation/flirting can do... always have your hobby phone # ready on a Business card with your 'fake' name on it...
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03-27-2015, 07:28 AM
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#22
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Gaining Momentum
Join Date: Jan 29, 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 51
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Dont join http://www.adultswithbenefits.com/ total waste of time, fake girls, probably all moderators
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07-29-2021, 02:02 PM
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#23
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BANNED
Join Date: Aug 31, 2019
Location: London
Posts: 73
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I do not see anything shameful in going to such sites, to be honest. Very many people feel uncertain when starting an acquaintance in real life. So why not to try it online https://besthookup.io/ ? It does not oblige you to any responsibility. But you can easily register and start communication. You should not necessarily meet your partner in reality, you have time to study him well.
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07-29-2021, 02:45 PM
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#24
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Premium Access
Join Date: Aug 16, 2015
Location: fort worth tx
Posts: 552
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Next thing ur going to tell me is Ashley Madison has fakes on it !!!! Oh be
my beating heart!!
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07-29-2021, 06:23 PM
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#25
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The Girlfriend Experience
User ID: 360415
Join Date: Aug 6, 2016
Location: Washington, D.C.
Posts: 1,009
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I have no idea... I would never fuck anyone like that LOL
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07-29-2021, 07:54 PM
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#26
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Account Disabled
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Well.. there are some sites that have sluts on them and do not mind fucking a married man. Maybe for free maybe it will cost you something.. depend on your looks. POF Adult friend finder.
Good Luck
Remember even if its free it will still cost you.
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03-14-2023, 12:21 AM
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#27
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Upgraded Female Account
User ID: 602001
Join Date: Mar 9, 2023
Location: La Porte, Texas
Posts: 7
My ECCIE Reviews
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Majichands
Well.. there are some sites that have sluts on them and do not mind fucking a married man. Maybe for free maybe it will cost you something.. depend on your looks. POF Adult friend finder.
Good Luck
Remember even if its free it will still cost you.
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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03-14-2023, 04:47 AM
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#28
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Premium Access
Join Date: Oct 10, 2010
Location: Ft. Worth, TX
Posts: 1,279
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Try this: 1) Get on Tube. 2) Look-up 'The Better Batchelor' , & Courtney Ryan. You won't find an answer to your 'quest', however you may find answers as to 'why' you are in the predicament you now find yourself in.
You are on a journey 'Grasshopper', and you have already taken the first steps. Now, take the next.
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