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05-02-2011, 03:50 PM
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#16
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Account Disabled
User ID: 2746
Join Date: Dec 17, 2009
Location: Houston
Posts: 7,168
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
I respect that. I simply don't feel slut or whore are words should be culturally shocking in the first place. I have never found them to be such, but I do believe in respecting the sensitivity of others. As such I do mind myself when I use them, taking into consideration the person and context. I find them fun and hot and don't care to ban them from my vocabulary.
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You are absolutely correct. It shouldn't have any negative connotation. Maybe it's just one of the few remaining methods society uses in an attempt to control women and the sexual revolution.
I love the idea of the walk. I'd participate if we had one here.
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05-02-2011, 05:18 PM
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#17
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Account Disabled
User ID: 59709
Join Date: Dec 14, 2010
Location: stars
Posts: 3,680
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SillyGirl
I try not to allow the words of others to effect my sense of worth. It is the feeling behind the words, not the words themselves that are to blame. It doesn't matter to me if you call me a whore or an angel, I care about which one was said with the intention of hurting me.
I love the idea for this walk, it looks like the closest place they may be having one is in St. Louis and I'd totally go over there for that. I haven't been marching in a while!
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exactly, I hear you :-)
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05-02-2011, 05:19 PM
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#18
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Account Disabled
User ID: 59709
Join Date: Dec 14, 2010
Location: stars
Posts: 3,680
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OliviaHoward
You are absolutely correct. It shouldn't have any negative connotation. Maybe it's just one of the few remaining methods society uses in an attempt to control women and the sexual revolution.
I love the idea of the walk. I'd participate if we had one here.
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05-03-2011, 03:18 AM
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#19
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Account Disabled
User ID: 4424
Join Date: Jan 1, 2010
Posts: 889
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OliviaHoward
You are absolutely correct. It shouldn't have any negative connotation. Maybe it's just one of the few remaining methods society uses in an attempt to control women and the sexual revolution.
I love the idea of the walk. I'd participate if we had one here.
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There is a similar walk done to promote sex worker rights - which I actually refuse to participate in. Like the "slut walk" women are encouraged to wear provocative clothing, thigh high boots, miniskirts and the like. I have to admit, this bothers me, because it paints a stereotype that I feel is unfair. I see nothing wrong with some of the women dressing that way, but there should be women in business suits, jeans and t-shirts as well. Frankly, dressing like a stereotype doesn't make anyone stop and think. Seeing women in business attire and dressed like the girl next door amongst the ones that really do dress in highly sexed clothes might actually stun people, maybe put them in a position to consider that we're not so very different than they are.
Yet the slut walk didn't bother me. Context I guess.
Alas I wasn't in town for Slut Walk, which is all too often the case with awesome events in Toronto.
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05-03-2011, 05:05 AM
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#20
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BANNED
Join Date: Apr 8, 2011
Location: Have snorkel, will travel
Posts: 174
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Can I be the devil's advocate for a moment?
Before we all trip over ourselves in a rush to political correctness, can I offer that the Toronto's Police representative's comment was actually sound advice?
Take a deep breath and think before making a knee jerk reaction. His advice is no less direct then telling people that wish to avoid home invasion robberies, that they probably shouldn't leave their front door wide open all night long.
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05-03-2011, 06:50 AM
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#21
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Registered Member
Join Date: Feb 8, 2011
Location: Greater NYC Area
Posts: 9
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Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wetwork Daddy
Can I be the devil's advocate for a moment?
Before we all trip over ourselves in a rush to political correctness, can I offer that the Toronto's Police representative's comment was actually sound advice?
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Hmmmmm. "Women should avoid dressing like sluts if they don't want to get raped" is sound advice??? (I guess because men are vicious animals who become unable to treat other human beings with dignity and respect when our limbic system gets all riled up by the sight of boobies and legs, or something?) Well I don't know about *that*, but here's some advice I found that I'm pretty sure would *definitely* help eliminate sexual assault, if only everyone followed it: Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work
1. Don’t put drugs in women’s drinks.
2. When you see a woman walking by herself, leave her alone.
3. If you pull over to help a woman whose car has broken down, remember not to rape her.
4. If you are in a lift and a woman gets in, don’t rape her.
5. When you encounter a woman who is asleep, the safest course of action is to not rape her.
6. Never creep into a woman’s home through an unlocked door or window, or spring out at her from between parked cars, or rape her.
7. When you lurk in bushes and doorways with criminal intentions, always wear bright clothing, wave a flashlight, or play “Boys Who Rape (Should All Be Destroyed)” by the Raveonettes on a boombox really loud, so women in the vicinity will know where to aim their flamethrowers.
8. USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM! If it is inconvenient for you to stop yourself from raping women, ask a trusted friend to accompany you when lurking in shadows.
9. Carry a rape whistle. If you find that you are about to rape a woman, you can hand the whistle to your buddy, so s/he can blow it to call for help.
10. Give your buddy a revolver, so that when indifferent passers-by either ignore the rape whistle, or gather round to enjoy the spectacle, s/he can pistol-whip you.
11. Don’t forget: Honesty is the best policy. When asking a woman out on a date, don’t pretend that you are interested in her as a person; tell her straight up that you expect to be raping her later. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the woman may take it as a sign that you do not plan to rape her.
In other words, the best way to prevent rape is to not rape anybody.
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05-03-2011, 07:24 AM
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#22
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Account Disabled
User ID: 6814
Join Date: Jan 8, 2010
Location: SW Houston
Posts: 2,502
My ECCIE Reviews
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Well, I didn't read every ones post on here.. as we are going on page 3 of this thread. But it is a shame that there are so many in the world today who think Rape/Sexual Assault has anything to do with sex or being turned on by looking at a provocatively dressed woman. It is about Control, Humiliation, and harm done on both physical and emotional levels. Both men and women get raped.
Glad to see they had an event to educate people.
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05-03-2011, 09:06 AM
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#23
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Account Disabled
User ID: 2746
Join Date: Dec 17, 2009
Location: Houston
Posts: 7,168
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
There is a similar walk done to promote sex worker rights - which I actually refuse to participate in. Like the "slut walk" women are encouraged to wear provocative clothing, thigh high boots, miniskirts and the like. I have to admit, this bothers me, because it paints a stereotype that I feel is unfair. I see nothing wrong with some of the women dressing that way, but there should be women in business suits, jeans and t-shirts as well. Frankly, dressing like a stereotype doesn't make anyone stop and think. Seeing women in business attire and dressed like the girl next door amongst the ones that really do dress in highly sexed clothes might actually stun people, maybe put them in a position to consider that we're not so very different than they are.
Yet the slut walk didn't bother me. Context I guess.
Alas I wasn't in town for Slut Walk, which is all too often the case with awesome events in Toronto.
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Definitely, you are correct in my opinion. I think that dressing vs not dressing provocatively more addresses feminism and the social ideas that allows some men to think that any aggressive behavior is acceptable. So I agree with you, dressing in jeans or a suit is better suited for the message and changing from within.
I agree with Guilty and Curious Cat – great post BTW. Really rape is an act of angry aggression. And bottom line – if men didn’t rape women, women wouldn’t’ get raped.
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05-03-2011, 09:10 AM
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#24
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Account Disabled
User ID: 59709
Join Date: Dec 14, 2010
Location: stars
Posts: 3,680
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
Frankly, dressing like a stereotype doesn't make anyone stop and think. Seeing women in business attire and dressed like the girl next door amongst the ones that really do dress in highly sexed clothes might actually stun people, maybe put them in a position to consider that we're not so very different than they are.
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Actually, in my experience the women most likely dressed in such "stereotypes" as you call it are the ones NOT working as escorts.
Maybe the "support the sexworkers" walk in your country could use some business attire women because in my experience these are the ones escorts look like , talking about stereotypes. :-))) (lol)
Most escorts are busy looking like the typical stereotype of a business woman,
regular women are busy looking like the stereotype of a HDH
business women are going all esoteric ..
funny world indeed, its about orientation i assume.
I never dress according to any stereotypes. I would dress up like i do for BurningMan for the Slutwalk. I guess its a way to get attention. Just the effort for dressing up is fun, too.
What bothers me dress-wise is not the typically stereotypically dresses people (the ones that actually have a certain style and think about looking) what bothers me are these people that absolutely don`t bother how they look like and what they wear. These are in my eyes the most annoying crowd. But i am a bit snobbish when it comes to health consciousness and look. I don`t prefer certain body types but i prefer "well dressed" people (that can be fancy, stylish, conservative, but it has to be at least metrosexual).
Uncombed hair and no perfume - gross :-) (except for survival training probably)
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05-03-2011, 09:14 AM
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#25
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Account Disabled
User ID: 59709
Join Date: Dec 14, 2010
Location: stars
Posts: 3,680
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wetwork Daddy
Can I be the devil's advocate for a moment?
Before we all trip over ourselves in a rush to political correctness, can I offer that the Toronto's Police representative's comment was actually sound advice?
Take a deep breath and think before making a knee jerk reaction. His advice is no less direct then telling people that wish to avoid home invasion robberies, that they probably shouldn't leave their front door wide open all night long.
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Gosh that was the comment i just NEEDED..... You actually seem to be as educated on rapes as this stupid stereotypically sex-negative police officer.
Have you been aware of the fact that most women that get raped are the ones usual people would consider rather conservative and plain looking or "grey mouses" ? There are several studies about that. Plus i have worked together (in a regular job) with a woman having been raped in Vienna. She was not dressed sexy nor would she ever have been.
Before making such a comment read statistics and sociological studies. Rapists don`t want sexually experienced women. If they did they would hire prostitutes, right? They want them to be inexperienced, shy and easy to overcome. Nuff`said before my head explodes!
So telling that sexpositivity is encouraging rapists is as if WE were responsible for their actions?? Really??
WOULD YOU ALSO SUGGEST TO PEOPLE NOT GETTING KIDS BECAUSE IT WOULD ENCOURAGE PEDOPHILES ?????
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05-03-2011, 04:58 PM
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#26
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BANNED
Join Date: Apr 8, 2011
Location: Have snorkel, will travel
Posts: 174
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All I am saying is that when women dress provocatively, they should understand that it may trigger something primal in males. While most of the gender of the species is capable of restraining those urges, lusts, and aggressive rages, some unbalanced or immoral men can't or won't.
I did not say that "dressing slutty" is the sole cause of rape.
Just like leaving your front door open all night is not the sole cause of home burglary. To say that it does not exacerbate the activity is just plain stupid though--like leaving your door wide open and being shock that some of your possessions are missing.
You will find a very as a very good list of many proactive things you can do to protect yourself here:
RAPE PREVENTION
I am saying that perhaps having some situational awareness about how you are dressed how it may agitate an unbalanced person and knowing what part of town you happen to be in, could also be a preventive tool you keep in your box.
Contrary to popular belief, there are some forms of rape that are indeed sexual. Forensic criminologists will also tell you that even in violent rape that often has an element sexual stimulation in the the patterns that serial rapist respond to. When they do victimization, you bet they often discover sexual triggers that were common. If you disagree with these facts, I suggest you put more credence in what Quantico reports than what NOW propagandizes.
Don't fool yourself. Inside every man is a primal beast, some of us are just better at restraint.
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05-04-2011, 08:07 AM
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#27
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Account Disabled
User ID: 59709
Join Date: Dec 14, 2010
Location: stars
Posts: 3,680
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wetwork Daddy
All I am saying is that when women dress provocatively, they should understand that it may trigger something primal in males.
Don't fool yourself. Inside every man is a primal beast, some of us are just better at restraint.
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All i am saying is that if women have little kids they should understand that it may trigger something primal in some asshole lunatics? you are kidding, right?
So we have the typical "victim turned villain" response here. Its the women`s and the kids fault here when they get raped.
Plus - again - you seem to ignore sociological studies on rape (i pointed them out previously) because women who dress sexy are NOT the ones that get raped.
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05-04-2011, 08:56 AM
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#28
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 7365
Join Date: Jan 10, 2010
Location: houston
Posts: 2,641
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I would go dressed as a nun to prove a point..Clothing does not matter it can happen to anyone anytime! It's the action of the man, not the victim.
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05-04-2011, 10:34 AM
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#29
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BANNED
Join Date: Apr 8, 2011
Location: Have snorkel, will travel
Posts: 174
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So apparently all the forensic psychologists at Quantico are quacks.
Have you read the studies about sexual sadists and serial rapists?
There is always a sexual trigger. That does not mean it is meant to blame the victim, but to put your head in the sand and refuse to acknowledge that these triggers exists is not just silly, it is dangerous.
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05-04-2011, 11:57 AM
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#30
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Account Disabled
User ID: 2746
Join Date: Dec 17, 2009
Location: Houston
Posts: 7,168
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Your argument, that men are not strong enough to control themselves, is the same argument that Islam gives for forcing women to cover them selves. It's nonsense. Also, no where in your link does it say anything about not dressing provocatively.
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