Where are the Classy Girls? Also, Tips for Gentlemen

[corvette689]

I'm surprised you aren't having luck with the dinner proposition. All the ladies I have seen offer dinner dates. Are you asking them to meet you for dinner as just a meet and greet with no guaranty of compensation? In that case, it's no wonder. The whole point of this hobby is to eliminate all the BS of conventional dating.

[DarkeyKong]

Originally Posted by corvette689

I ,too, have noticed quite a bit of false "upscale" advertising. Take the time to read their biographies, correspond with them and get a feel for the way they express themselves. Pair this with their reviews,and you can get a better sense of whether a particular provider is , infact, classy. Eccie in general caters to the middle class , however sift through and you will come across some gems. Start by searching providers that are over $350/hr.
Does a higher rate guaranty class? No. But again, that's where the research on your part comes in.

Agreed, upscale has become more of a "buzz" word in some regards. You would almost have to filter out the ads that include "upscale" to find the real deal.

[TravelingGentleman]

Originally Posted by corvette689

I'm surprised you aren't having luck with the dinner proposition. All the ladies I have seen offer dinner dates. Are you asking them to meet you for dinner as just a meet and greet with no guaranty of compensation? In that case, it's no wonder. The whole point of this hobby is to eliminate all the BS of conventional dating.

I created a thread in another sub-forum here about my attempts thus far. The nearest I've had to a dinner date was the one that showed up dressed *very* in appropriately, and I gave her a $20 to cover gas back to wherever she came from when she walked in.

Anyone I'm with in public needs to be demonstrably capable of passing as a customer, vendor, or co-worker of mine. I'm approached out of the blue at random places often enough by people who know me (and my family) that ...well, I have my requirements, just like ladies have theirs.

[Camille Fox]

I agree with the whole "upscale" label. Anyone can claim to be "upscale", but doing a bit of research, a bit more correspondence with the lady, and asking around should help you narrow down and provide you with better odds.


Best of luck to you!



Camille

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by TravelingGentleman

Old-T:

My gratitude for a thoughtful reply. I feel the need to clarify a few points based on your thoughts.

....
At any rate, thanks for keeping the conversation interesting.

Thank you for the kind words. This forum should be about thoughtful, polite discussions. It would become very dull if everyone had the same views.

Also, thank you for the clarification. In my mind it certainly reduces some of the concerns I had when I read your first post.

I understand your point about references, and indeed when a gentleman does not have any it makes things inconvenient and more difficult. There are, however, a number of quality ladies who will screen without references. If a lady does not screen at all I personally take that as a serious caution about meeting her. To me, one trait of a lady I want to date is that she values her own safety and does not easily put herself in positions where she can be leveraged by others.

This entire community works best when there is trust in both directions. Certainly the best dates occur when there is a high level of trust. But that trust must be earned, just as you point out. Often different ladies have very different ideas of how to establish the initial level of trust--enough to agree to that first meeting. That is where screening becomes personal, and "enough" screening essentially means "enough conviction that they can trust you". The tools to accomplish that can and do vary among people and circumstances.

[CelesteCarter]

Clarity is important in communication, that's why I asked. 😊

I didn't state a date is unwelcome however, you have to look at it from a woman's stand point. A lot of men enjoy conversation and good company above anything else. So say we go on a dinner date for a meeting prior to setting up a real date so you can see if you are truly attracted to me. If the compensation for that date is the meal, then the woman is working on a hope wish and prayer that the consult will result in a paid date in the future. The only problem on this scenario is our business isn't based on hope not faith in the unknown.(The unknown being a new gent/client)

By chance you hit it off and the two see each other numerous times in the future, this scenario I'm sure would be adopted it by all. However most women will find that things don't pan out like that. And they end up with several coffee dates/dinners and no real income coming in from the dates that we are accustomed to.

Now that's not to say that no women will take you up on this offer. But with no references of your character, it's not that likely.

And, speaking for myself, meeting someone on a blind date so he can decide if he wants to set up a real date in the future is too hit or miss. Even hair stylist get compensated for consults, why shouldn't we get the same? Lol Not to mention my best clients are the true definition of a gentleman. They all book multi hours, overnights, weekend getaways etc. And those guys don't write reviews, don't post on this board, nada but they also never asked to meet in advance to give me the once over. Lol Different strokes for different folks I suppose.

Originally Posted by TravelingGentleman

This thread is more about ladies and gentleman, and not so much about me individually. For me in particular - a lady could show up at my office complex posing as a contractor or visitor (wearing appropriate business attire) and get a guided tour, inclusive of my office and business card, and a sit down interview in my conference room.

I actually thought that the idea of a pseudo-blind-date at a popular restaurant, arriving and leaving separately would be a bit more tasteful - I'm astonished at how unwelcome the idea is throughout the forums.

[Find Your Joy]

Am I the only one who hates the term "classy"? I find that sometimes when people use this term they really have no idea what having class is. Classy seems to equal a "bright and shiny" object that has caught your attention. Having class is equal to kindness, compassion, manners, thoughtfulness etc... Just my opinion.

[TravelingGentleman]

Originally Posted by CelesteCarter

And, speaking for myself, meeting someone on a blind date so he can decide if he wants to set up a real date in the future is too hit or miss. Even hair stylist get compensated for consults, why shouldn't we get the same?

No one has suggested that you shouldn't! I've actually receiving some great feedback from Camille on how to ask for a non-BCD date, and if there are specific rates for it. I'm going to have to give it a try.

[CelesteCarter]

Sounds good.

Most providers do offer a rate for a meet & greet.

Again good luck with your search and thanks for the topic.

Originally Posted by TravelingGentleman

No one has suggested that you shouldn't! I've actually receiving some great feedback from Camille on how to ask for a non-BCD date, and if there are specific rates for it. I'm going to have to give it a try.

[thebuffmantraples]

Welcome to eccie.
You are a newbie get over it and admit it a thousand times please.

Follow your own advice about listening and striving to understand first....then with experience restate your diatrible.

When it comes to safety, security, and discretion never forget this is not Neverland for either party!

Once deemed safe an found your niche then by all means this is Neverland, Shangri LA and LA DI Da.

I sense you would like to skip the being a newbie thing, experience, something not to be missed!
Again welcome to hobbyland bro.

Some of us Gentlemen know what we like, how to get what we want, and nothing of being a gentlemen has to fit your definition stated. Grow up open your mind. This is a new age, everyday, and some Gents don't have to fit your definitions obviously.

To me a Gentleman doesn't complain! He just fixes or readjust to the task at hand. You seem to be complaining........about your foibles so far? And I did read everything. To each his/her own view.


Have a great day.

[Guest041816-1]

In this little world the majority of girl charge for their time that's why they're here you will see prices for $50 up to the regular fee for a meet and great. Now you can get lucky and find some who doesn't charge willing to meet for screening purposes. But honestly I dont think the hobby world is the best option for you as you describe a potential encounter you would offer sounds like more on a personable level which takes time to build.
Never underestimate the $ sign the lady advertise rather she charges $250 hr or $500 they are all are here for a reason Money so most try to sugar coat with Classy, Upscale, Elite, VIP or Luxury .

Regarding the Hawaii trip-she was too comfortable with that situation she should've received half of the money before she boarded the plane and the other half at the end of the trip. Sorry that happen I know that was the worst feeling ever

Regarding Pictures true story but I'l lmake this short. I had a interview and was hired by someone from this hobby world. I end up leaving later received a text saying he saw a girl that looks like me on a website but he never told me which site. "He actually text me the pictures. After that day I tried to pull all photos and my website that had my face showing. So you never know who's out there.

[Nicolet]

Excellent post, TravelingGentleman.
After reading the comments, especially yours OP, I am curious.
I gather from the way you express yourself that you are an established gentleman, meaning you are a man of societal position and financial means, and it did not come to you overnight.
With that in mind, the word 'girl' seems out of place, to my eyes at least. A woman with poise, grace, and intelligence seems more fitting to the tone of your post.
If I may suggest, if you want to find a companion here that is equal to your needs and desires, research a lady that interests you. Read all you can about her, and talk to her. Between your research, and the feeling you get speaking to her is positive, take it from there.
There are some wonderful women here, and in Houston. Best wishes to you.

[HelenaIriepalomino]

Very interesting post!

I choose for the most part not to show my face or only show parts of it. It's discretion reason. Not everyone that knows about our "secret" lifestyle is a friend. Vice in certain cities, past jealous personal lovers, family & stalkers are all reasons to be discreet.

Yes I describe myself as elegant. Yes I love fine dining but equally comfortable horseback riding in jeans. I don't get too hung up on making sure I am labeled as "high class". I am just ME.

[TravelingGentleman]

Originally Posted by HelenaIriepalomino

Yes I describe myself as elegant. Yes I love fine dining but equally comfortable horseback riding in jeans. I don't get too hung up on making sure I am labeled as "high class". I am just ME.

Elegance isn't a clothing line, it's demeanor and behavior. I suppose you could say that knowing what is appropriate to wear and when could be a feature of an elegant person.

Elegance and grace are synonyms - what you wear has nothing to do with how graceful you are, but everything to do with how you conduct yourself.


*edit* I stand corrected. Someone actually created a clothesline titled "Elegance."

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by TravelingGentleman

Elegance isn't a clothing line, it's demeanor and behavior. I suppose you could say that knowing what is appropriate to wear and when could be a feature of an elegant person.

Elegance and grace are synonyms - what you wear has nothing to do with how graceful you are, but everything to do with how you conduct yourself.


*edit* I stand corrected. Someone actually created a clothesline titled "Elegance."

Agree. Elegance is about the person--not the location or the accessories. It is very difficult to "measure", but is bearing, attitude, what a person says, ....

My ATF is nice looking, but not gorgeous by typical standards. But she knows how to hold herself in a way--express herself verbally and non verbally--so she is the focus of eyes in any forum. I have seen her at functions on a Cabinet member's arm as his (unpaid) date for the evening, in a room filled with royalty, ambassadors, and some incredibly beautiful starlets--but she invariably attracts the high prestige circle around her without trying. And later that weekend she can hang out in jeans and a t-shirt around the starving artist crowd and again be the center of attention. You know an elegant person when you see them, but to describe exactly what makes them so is exceedingly difficult.