What do you do if a provider wants a relationship?

[bojulay]

Keep it real and keep it fun, could be a nice thing,
you never know so give it a try. If it gets to be a
drag, then it's not worth it. Your not marrying the
girl so tell her you can give it a try. Just talk with
her about all the aspects and expectations.

I think life is to short not to try different things
and see where they go.

The biggest regrets I've had in life have been
from not doing rather than doing when the
opportunity was there.

But, I am a romantic at heart.

[Guest110516]

Talk to her. If your ground rules are compatible....

Relationships are more expensive than hobbies. Do a cost/benefit/risk analysis. If that comes out OK....

Follow your heart.

[shorty]

Some question's to ask yourself and her is, What would be her and your plan in the hobby? Is she wanting to get out? Does she have another source of income, if she did get out?

[pipefitter73]

Originally Posted by JHurt1968

There is a provider that I've been seeing on a fairly regular basis over the last 2 months. I've never written a review on her because she is very much UTR..... I've seen her 6 times total and every one of them has been great.

First off, UTR's are more likely to fall for a hobbyist than professionals escorts from my experience. If you're single, I guess she's taking a liking to you. And if you got it for free and didn't compensate, then you are misleading her.

Second, you're a hobbyist and you've been seeing her too often.... that's how your problem started. I have a rule that, no matter how much I like a lady, I won't see her any more than once a month....maybe once every 3 weeks at the most. I have one lady whom I could see every few days (she's so damn good to me and pushes all the right buttons), but I don't want to risk getting any emotions going since we're both married... lol.

Originally Posted by Shayla

You met her under circumstances where you paying for a service and that was it..... That is not why men see escorts...

Very true.... I see escorts for 3 reasons-
1. My wife got fat and won't DATY, give me BJ's or sex
2.No commitment as in a relationship or SD/SB arrangement
3.Variety. I used to wonder what it would be to spend time with different types of ladies. I'm finding out and I like it!..... and best part is at the end of the day I go home with a smile.

[guest040412]

Originally Posted by *GoddessDallas*

You are an adult.
Sit down with her, look her in the face, and tell her like you have told an entire forum that you don't want a romantic relationship with her.
Quit giving her false hopes.
Print off this article you have in the forum here and just give it to HER.
If you like her, give her that much respect to tell her.

+1 x 100. You are in a position others might envy, yet you don't want to be there. No need to delay or play games, just tell her.

[tonytiger4u]

Only two ways to a mans heart and your getting both. I'm a total sucker for the "damsel in distress" bit. I'd probably do something stupid. Good luck to you.

[JHurt1968]

Thanks for all the comments and advice. I've made arrangements to see her tonight and I'm laying all the cards out on the table. I like her but I just don't see anything working out between us. I'm going to end it completely with so I don't cause her any pain.

[69er]

I've actually been in a situation much like this.

A provider I was seeing on a regular basis told me that she thought she loved me, and was interested in more from our relationship. At the time I wasn't sure if I was ready for another relationship, and told her so. I told her I needed time to think, and decide if I was interested in a relationship.

I think the pause was good for both of us. It made me decide if I was honestly ready to give a relationship a shot, and gave her some time to make sure of how she felt. About a week later I told her that I was interested in giving it a shot, and we both decided on some ground rules. I made quite a bit more than her, so I was happy to pay for dinners, movies, etc, but no pay for sex. Our relationship would be boyfriend/girlfriend. The only difference, was how we met. She had decided to stop providing, so that was no longer an issue. I told her that I would not hobby.

Our relationship didn't work out, but it didn't work because we wanted different things, and our goals were too different. I'll always remember her. She is one of a very few ladies in my life that I loved, and would have done most anything for. I'll bet that a single call from her today, and I'd do whatever I could to help her out.

So, be honest with yourself. Relationships always take some time, but if you have time to be here, I think you have the time to redirect that to a relationship.

Be honest with her. Everybody needs to talk about their expectations.

I'm suspecting that you are a bit like me. I didn't want to get involved, as I had been really hurt in a past relationship. I was using this place as a way to have a very limited relationship, one with some benefits and little risk of heartache. I've since learned the error of my ways.

I'd suggest that if you go the boyfriend / girlfriend route, that the first couple dates as a minimum, sex isn't part of the deal. This puts the emphasis on the relationship, rather than sexual chemistry. I think it might make it easier for both of you to decide if you really like each other.

As far as being honest, and that being perceived as harsh... perhaps you are being too harsh. There is always a way to be honest, without being harsh. Try to think of it as much from the other individuals perspective as your own. Once you realize their perspective, you will understand how to be honest, without being hurtful.

Good luck! Really putting yourself out there in a serious relationship is a bit scary, as you run the risk of hurting the other party, or being hurt.

[evietaylor]

Originally Posted by JHurt1968

Thanks for all the comments and advice. I've made arrangements to see her tonight and I'm laying all the cards out on the table. I like her but I just don't see anything working out between us. I'm going to end it completely with so I don't cause her any pain.

Good for you.

A good provider has NO gray area. There's hobby/work world & there's real/civvie world. We MUST keep them separate to keep our sanity.

You should definitely end it for the sake of both of you...especially her's. You're doing her a favor by not seeing her anymore.

[shorty]

Originally Posted by JHurt1968

Thanks for all the comments and advice. I've made arrangements to see her tonight and I'm laying all the cards out on the table. I like her but I just don't see anything working out between us. I'm going to end it completely with so I don't cause her any pain.

At least go a couple of rounds with her before sitting her down to end it!

[charlestudor2005]

What do you do if a provider wants a relationship?

The only relationship one has ever wanted with me is a cash transaction relationship. Or, if they don't, they won't see me. But, that's not a relationship.

[shorty]

Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

What do you do if a provider wants a relationship?

The only relationship one has ever wanted with me is a cash transaction relationship. Or, if they don't, they won't see me. But, that's not a relationship.

Oh Charles, you're just playing hard to get!

[pyramider]

Chuck is a tease.

[charlestudor2005]

Originally Posted by shorty

Oh Charles, you're just playing hard to get!

Not hard to get, just hard.

[Jackie S]

Have you ever heard the saying "don't take advice on how to handle live Lobsters from a guy who is missing fingers".

Well, you should have put this in the Men's Section. Asking Hookers how to handle a situation with another Hooker is not a wise course of action.

Whether they will admitt it or not, a lot of these Ladies have "Pretty Woman Syndrom". They think one day Richard Gere is going to drive up and fall in love.

Do you feel like Richard Gere?