Worst Predicament

[Jackie S]

Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

So tell us what is the worst predicament that you have ever been in?

I was thinking that stepping on a live land mine and knowing that if you even twitch, you'll set it off, but damn, now you really need to take a piss!

Fast Gunn, I have been there and done that.

Not a land mine per say, but a trip wire hooked to what we called a "sweeper", it just sprayed shrapnel accross your path at about shin high level.

When you feel the wire, there is that split second that you realize that something horrible is about to happen, but you don't really remember when it actually does. You simply get flipped just like someone pulled a rug out from under you.

Then the pain, then the morphine, the Corpsman telling you not to look down, then the months thinking about what was in store for the rest of your life.

I can't remember if I had a piss or not, but I do remember the smell indicating that I had shit my pants.

War is hell..........

[CuteOldGuy]

Damn, Jackie. Really? God Bless you! I'm glad you made it through!

[Fast Gunn]

Well, that is a tragic story that I'm sorry to hear, JS.

I used to work with a guy who was a solider in the Viet Nam war.

He told me that he actually stepped on a land mine one day without realizing what he had done.

After the explosion and the smoke cleared, he was splattered in blood and he could see his right foot was a bloody mess that landed about 20 yards away. Doctors never could reattach the foot and he suffered from phantom limb pain every day after that.

. . . Very bad things can often happen in an instant especially in war, but in civilian life as well. You'd better watch your step!

Originally Posted by Jackie S

Fast Gunn, I have been there and done that.

Not a land mine per say, but a trip wire hooked to what we called a "sweeper", it just sprayed shrapnel accross your path at about shin high level.

When you feel the wire, there is that split second that you realize that something horrible is about to happen, but you don't really remember when it actually does. You simply get flipped just like someone pulled a rug out from under you.

Then the pain, then the morphine, the Corpsman telling you not to look down, then the months thinking about what was in store for the rest of your life.

I can't remember if I had a piss or not, but I do remember the smell indicating that I had shit my pants.

War is hell..........

[Guest040616]

Originally Posted by Jackie S

Not a land mine per say, but a trip wire hooked to what we called a "sweeper", it just sprayed shrapnel accross your path at about shin high level.

That is about as bad as a predicament can get! Give thanks for making it home alive so that you can share the story!

[bojulay]

The last girl that Fast Gunn dated.

[Seedy]

Originally Posted by bojulay

The last girl that Fast Gunn dated.

Lmao, she should have used that on him, maybe she did, up his ass that is.... lol

[Fast Gunn]

Yes, sometimes we're attracted to dangerous women.

When they're in a loving mood all that passion makes for incredible sex, but when they're in bitch mode, you may get your ass blown out of the water if you say the wrong thing!

. . . She will promise you more than the Garden of Eden, but then she'll carelessly cut you and laugh when you're bleeding!

Originally Posted by bojulay

The last girl that Fast Gunn dated.

[JCM800]

Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

Yes, sometimes we're attracted to dangerous women.

When they're in a loving mood all that passion makes for incredible sex, but when they're in bitch mode, you may get your ass blown out of the water if you say the wrong thing!

. . . She will promise you more than the Garden of Eden, but then she'll carelessly cut you and laugh when you're bleeding!

it's been known to happen...

[JD Barleycorn]

Okay, show of hands. How many of you have stepped on a land mine and had to piss? I did fuck in a minefield one time but didn't know until the next morning. A woman took me out to the beach outside Tel Aviv. As I was doing her doggie I was wondering why we had to cross razor wire but it was pitch black until the taxi showed up.


I think she looked something like this

[UB9IB6]

BS. You are full of shit.
No self respecting woman would fuck you, for free.

If you'd said," I was wanking it with some dudes from kansas....."
"And I sat on this dick" ...it would be much more likely to have been believed.

I suspect the only service you've provided were to some fellas from Kansas while on your knees.

Teacher.... that'd be another concoction .
Janitor is more likely.

[Fast Gunn]

You come up with the most unbelievable stories.

. . . Crossing razor wire territory has never put anyone in an amorous mood.

Originally Posted by JD Barleycorn

Okay, show of hands. How many of you have stepped on a land mine and had to piss? I did fuck in a minefield one time but didn't know until the next morning. A woman took me out to the beach outside Tel Aviv. As I was doing her doggie I was wondering why we had to cross razor wire but it was pitch black until the taxi showed up.


I think she looked something like this

[Guest040616]

Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

You come up with the most unbelievable stories.

. . . Crossing razor wire territory has never put anyone in an amorous mood.

That may be true but his fellow Pre K custodians love JD's tales of woe!

[Fast Gunn]

People tend to catch on once you start posting patently false stories.

The fact is that once you lose your credibility, it's damn difficult if not impossible to restore.

. . . To wit: "I did not have sex with that woman, Miss Lewinsky!"

Originally Posted by bigtex

That may be true but his fellow Pre K custodians love JD's tales of woe!

[TheDaliLama]

I remember stepping on some dog shit with my bare feet when I was a kid.

Thought I was going to die.

[JCM800]

Originally Posted by TheDaliLama

I remember stepping on some dog shit with my bare feet when I was a kid.

Thought I was going to die.

hahaha ....that is a tough predicament