YummyMarie: a place for her random ideas, thoughts, and musings

[Guest032117]

You've made me think about this. Let me add this detail and ask if you feel it changes anything: the club were this happened-while it is not labeled as such- has a high patronage of the LGBT community. After some thought, I can accept that I was not entirely innocent or mature in the situation. Hooker situation? No. Swinger situation? No. Open-relationship situation is more where me and my date were. The lady in question attended the party as a single girl, made out with me, and about two or three men that night, and was seated with one of them when the incident occurred. I have a feeling he was a much more traditional type, while at the same type hoping to get lucky with the two of us. She was smart enough not to pull one of her previous male-make-out partners in front of him, but somehow thought pulling a female in would be okay...? So the conflict as I see it (and WTF, you have helped me to re-evaluate it), was that expectations were different for everyone. Me and my date had an agreement. She and I had an agreement. She changed her mind, and led her current flirtation to believe he could expect more.

Thank you for helping me to see this situation more objectively, and I mean that with absolutely no sarcasm whatsoever.

This is the first time I've ever had a negative incident occur when going out. So what I am thinking is that the venue, combination of different relationship dynamics, and mixed expectations all contributed to this fiasco. She was someone I had just met, so I shouldn't have imposed my mindset on her personal situation, or assumed that she was truthfully on the same page as me. Lesson learned.

[WTF]

What I am saying is that when you combine alcohol, testosterone, exhibitionism and texting you are going to come up with a lot of immature behavior. I am not trying to say it was all your fault but that you were part of the equation. The only way to try and not have it happen again is to acknowledge it , you seem very mature in that department.

Lastly real time posting to the thread may give you reason to pause on how seriously you are taking this thread. First you are posting what sounded like an episode of the Jerry Springer show .... not sure if that is the image you want to project and is seems as if this is a posting addiction you might want to break. Ask any guy who has ever been with a lady who can not seem to turn off her phone.

Thank you for not taking this personal , another mature attribute....it was just observations on my part. Have a nice day.

[Guest032117]

Jerry Springer...LOL...

Posting addiction...perhaps. I go through spurts of posting on my thread here, and visit the Houston forums from time to time.

For the most part, I try not to get bogged down with the idea of projected image. This thread could have been started by an intelligent person with marketing in mind, but the truth is that it wasn't, and I try my best to keep the overall tone and spirit in which I started it.

I still remember the day I started it. I was sitting in the backyard at my previous residence, sitting criss-cross in a canvas folding-chair. I just didn't have the attention span to keep a single topic going for very long, but I had plenty of random thoughts and ideas I wanted to converse about in a light-hearted fashion.

When it comes to different areas of my life, I have a need to share experiences with others who may understand them. I personally don't feel as if I could provide happily without having a feeling of belonging and community interaction. I would feel very isolated otherwise. I feel for the men and women in this hobby who do not have someone to share the experiences with (those that desire that). Not everyone is as open or as socially inclined as I am. This thread was-and still is-an outlet for me.

The unintended-but later realized and appreciated-side effect of starting this thread was a unique and consistent marketing opportunity. However, with that in mind, it would have served that purpose better if I had placed it in the Houston Sandbox. I'm not sure it would have lasted as long though. The Houston climate can be challenging to say the least. I didn't feel the need to place it in the Houston area anyways. I felt, and still feel that my experiences, thoughts, and ideas could be applicable to just about anyone (with patience enough to stand my ramblings).

Image portrayal: I have a theory about ECCIE and my time with ECCIE clients who frequent the boards and follow my participation. To this day, I have never had a bad personality connection with those who choose to see me from ECCIE. When a person hears about me on this site, they do their research, especially after they see my pricepoint. They want to know what and who they are getting into. Could I stand to censor my experiences a bit more? Sure I could. I rarely regret posting anything, because it adds to a greater sense of who I am, and helps hobbyists to be more informed. If one of my posts turns someone off, it has helped me and them to weed out undesireable experiences. I am human. I have good and bad traits. I make mistakes. I also excel at many things.

If I was a provider that was truly struggling in the industry, I would be much more careful. However, that is not my personal situation. My business is consistent and allows me to meet my monthly and long-term financial needs. In addition, the demand for my services is adequate enough that I can afford to screen prospective clients and turn some away if I am not satisfied with the results of screening them. The way I do things works for me.

I appreciate open discussions. I am not opposed to being challenged. I could take insult at every remark a person directs at me, or I can make myself grow by trying to hear what others have to say. I can question every intention of the people around me, or take things at face value, and distinguishing between the two is a task in itself.

I was taught to embrace every mistake in life as an opportunity for improvement. So I have found a place on this board that I choose to open up and be vulnerable. I am highly aware that by posting here, I open myself up for enjoyable banter, as well as negative criticism.

This is who I am: open and honest to a fault, and well beyond the comfort level of many others. Some love this about me. Some can't understand or relate. I am okay with both extremes and everything in between.

[WTF]

Originally Posted by YummyMarie

Jerry Springer...LOL...

Or Jersey Shores.

Originally Posted by YummyMarie

Posting addiction...perhaps. I go through spurts of posting on my thread here, and visit the Houston forums from time to time.

If you are posting while out on a date....you might have a posting addiction....

Originally Posted by YummyMarie

For the most part, I try not to get bogged down with the idea of projected image. This thread could have been started by an intelligent person with marketing in mind, but the truth is that it wasn't, and I try my best to keep the overall tone and spirit in which I started it.

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So it was not started by an intelligent woman with marketing in mind?

That is the exception rather than the rule....95% of threads started by providers are started with marketing in mind. Not always very good marketing mind you but that is another subject.

Originally Posted by YummyMarie

The unintended-but later realized and appreciated-side effect of starting this thread was a unique and consistent marketing opportunity. However, with that in mind, it would have served that purpose better if I had placed it in the Houston Sandbox. I'm not sure it would have lasted as long though.

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It was not a matter of where you placed the thread but that it was attached as a sticky. You are not living in the real world if you think this thread would still be being posted in without that sticky. If you do not believe me ...unstick it and see how much longer a life it has. If you do not realize that then you are like a lottery winner thinking what a skillful lottery player she is. You should be doing something good for whom ever stuck that up there for you, if you are not already.




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[Guest032117]

LOL...intelligent? Yes. With marketing in mind? No. I wish I could claim that superior thought process.

It was Chica Chaser who made it into a sticky. I had never conversed or communicated with him before, nor did I have any clue who he was. Let me explain that 99% of the time I post from my phone, including the day I started this thread. User subtitles and signature lines are not viewable on the mobile version, so I have to go out of my way to view the desktop version if I get curious enough to want to see titles and sigs. Within a few hours, and before I even saw this thread on the desktop site, Chica had stickied it. There was no rhyme or reason. I was a little dumbfounded and flattered when a few of my hobby friends contacted and asked me how I got a sticky. I didn't have an answer for them. But after giving it some thought, here is what I have concluded: The climate of the National Sandbox in early 2013 was heavy with political discussions/disagreements between liberals, conservatives, independents, and trolls. Scrolling through the sandbox for something light-hearted was a laborious task (not unlike San Antonio co-ed during "RockerSlavegate").

I would like to think that this thread was somehow "special," but it is more likely that it was singled out because it was different. Like most lottery winners, I was happy to be a recipient of the "prize." Thus, I didn't openly question Chica Chaser's decision.

Like you, I believe it highly improbable that it would have ever been made into a sticky in the Houston forums. Honestly, I didn't know that regular threads were even eligible to become a sticky. As a provider, navigating ECCIE, learning the culture, and learning the ropes of providing all have a long learning curve.

A few months after it started, I had friends basically telling me that I had a "duty" to post often here and "take advantage" of the hand I was dealt when given a sticky. I struggle at times with this. Some days, and even weeks at a time, I am utterly uninspired and introverted in life, and you will notice it in my posting history.

It wasn't until about eight or nine months later that I finally bumped into Chica Chaser at a social event in another city. He was a very nice man. We had a little chat, and he pretty much confirmed my thoughts on why he made it a sticky: It was different. It was light-hearted. He somehow felt that I was a genuine and entertaining person/persona.

As far as thanking him, the most he ever got from me was a hug, a kiss on the cheek, and a 30 second shoulder rub just because I was feeling friendly.

So that's my story, and I'm STICKYing to it

[Guest032117]

Oh, and one more thing: when I go on one-on-one dates for quality time, it is agreed upon when/if cellphones are acceptable or not. I tend to date internet junkies just like me...male and female.

[Guest030824]

I was going to say when you and I spent some quality time you not once looked at your phone. For that you get my vote for ever.

[WTF]

You owe CC way more than a shoulder rub...





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[Guest032117]

My phone never comes out on a hobby date unless it's a clock-free or overnight, and I need to check on the munchkin farm. RW dates are where I have to make agreements. Sucks to date me IRL unless you are that one guy that did half the date with me via text. We did it for fun. We didn't talk, we just texted each other until one of our phones died. LOL.

[WTF]

My original post was about class. You blamed the man and I merely stated that he wasn't the only one lacking in this instance.

If you do not care how your persona is precieved or are truly proud of that type of behavior. ...then by all means keep posting away from the a Jerry Springer Show.

There is obviously an audience for it.

I am merely musing my somewhat random thoughts.

[Guest032117]

This is definitely not a situation to be proud of, but I am not afraid to learn from my mistakes. If that means putting it out there on the internet, and having a third party question me and challenge me to reevaluate the situation, so be it. Of course no one is forcing me to type or continue this thread. I make the choice every time I visit this site. If doing so causes some to see me and others not to, I accept the outcome. Please continue to muse your random thoughts at will. I know I will

[fun2come]

Originally Posted by YummyMarie

My phone never comes out on a hobby date unless it's a clock-free or overnight, and I need to check on the munchkin farm. ....

I can attest to that.... and as mentioned before, I did like what came out of your hobby bag

[Guest032117]

Oh that would be scandalous, wouldn't it???...more than a shoulder rub...hahaha!

[WTF]

I will you will we all will

[wh2onme]