RIP-OFF CLIENT

[GinaXXX]

My position is that it's up to the provider to get paid, IN FULL, for the entire amount prior to the session taking place.

It's not my job to run around collecting money for providers who fail to collect up front.

I've made notes, and will send him a warning.... but I don't consider this an alert. I actually consider this to be a cheap lesson to learn, that hopefully more than one provider has learned from.

These guys are NOT your friends and they WILL take advantage if you leave yourself open. If you leave yourself open, that's on YOU (imo).

Always,
Gina

PS:

How do we know this guy doesn't collect License Plate #'s?

Labeling an incident an "alert" because of what could have happened is absolutely not acceptable, under ANY circumstances. Your imagination does not create real incidents!

[hyperkine]

The guy's name is not nearly obscured enough. He sounds like a scammer, and a pathetic one at that...but being outed over a failed, unpaid m&g is a bit much.

[MrGiz]

Originally Posted by GinaXXX

PS:

Labeling an incident an "alert" because of what could have happened is absolutely not acceptable, under ANY circumstances. Your imagination does not create real incidents!

Point taken... but this appears to be a pattern of behavior with this guy... if ALERT is simply the wrong WORD to use... perhaps we can just agree that the girls should be WARNED about him!

[GinaXXX]

perhaps we can just agree that the girls should be WARNED about him!

Actually, I think providers need to be warned that clients often think that providers really want to go for coffee, lunch, chitchat, etc with them FOR FREE. Too many people think this community is a social group, when the reality is it's a business. There are providers who enforce the wrong mentality by selecting their "boyfriends" from the client pool..... but that's a whole other discussion.

Basically, it's the provider's responsibility to make it clear, before the meeting takes place, that they intend to be paid.... by getting paid! Many clients, particularly ones who hang out on boards like this, think that providers are their "friends", and would never think that a provider would want to be paid to "just go for coffee".

Passive aggressive fee collection is simply a bad business practice. I learned my lessons the hard way too!

Always,
Gina

[Ginger Doll]

Originally Posted by hyperkine

The guy's name is not nearly obscured enough. He sounds like a scammer, and a pathetic one at that...but being outed over a failed, unpaid m&g is a bit much.

Hyperkine, this gentleman's info is obscured per board policy. No one is outing anyone. By sharing his info, I'm simply trying to save others from experiencing his wrongdoings. To suggest otherwise is ludicrous. He did a horrible thing--he stole from me. If I had done the same to him, my info would also be posted as a warning to others. It's called accountability.

Originally Posted by Miss Dreams

I am very sorry this happened to you, I although do NOT do meet and greets...

There are several reasons I do m&g's on the first date...good rapport is one, my security is another. We all have different methods that provide us with a good comfort level. I tried several times to move the date forward; he was intentionally stalling. In retrospect, I should have gotten up and walked away sooner. I just had a difficult time believing that someone that had that many ok's & experience within the hobby would conduct himself in such a shady fashion...and I still do. I (mistakenly) gave him the benefit of the doubt.

Lesson learned. I will still continue to do first dates with a public m&g, but I will make it clear beforehand that I expect financial aspects to be handled immediately.

[armydude]

This guy needs to have his profile taken down. Also, he sounds a little unstable. I mean, you asked him questions and he just kept chatting on? He sounds odd. You know, I've asked some ladies to meet me for coffee also. But some refuse to do so. When I ask why, they say the coffee meet-ers are time wasters. After reading your post, I can see why some girls think that. From now on, you may try to make it perfectly clear that the coffee meeting isn't free. It's part of the date. I'm not saying you didn't make it clear, but just make sure guys comprehend the difference between paid and free. You did the right thing by not makin gan issue of this at the Starbucks with people around. You should have said "hey lets go for a walk down the street" and then demanded your money when no one was around. I'm sorry this happened to you.

[armydude]

Originally Posted by urhuckleberry

I obscured the gentleman's info - just a little too much personal info revealed.

The guidelines for Alerts (found in the above sticky thread) state, "Issues which could endanger the safety of a member or members of our community go here. Please reserve this space for legitimate alerts, and not general FYI material."

Like many NC/NS situations, this incident did not endanger the safety or security of the provider, so I am moving to coed discussions.

Huck

The man made an appointment with her, sat there chatting for 2 hours, took up her time, then didn't pay her!!

The mentality with the community is that we are all friends. Women constantly say they aren't in this line of work for the money, so I can see how some men "might" think going for coffee is off the clock. The moral of the story is, everyone make it clear the coffe dates aren't free. It's great to be friends, but you can have business relations with your friends too. It sounds to me that Ginger made it perfectly clear this was a paid date. The guy still stiffed her. Thats just not right.

[Miss Dreams]

Originally Posted by Ginger Doll

Hyperkine, this gentleman's info is obscured per board policy. No one is outing anyone. He did a horrible thing--he stole from me. If I had done the same to him, my info would also be posted as a warning to others. It's called accountability.



There are several reasons I do m&g's on the first date...good rapport is one, my security is another. We all have different methods that provide us with a good comfort level. I tried several times to move the date forward; he was intentionally stalling. In retrospect, I should have gotten up and walked away sooner. I just had a difficult time believing that someone that had that many ok's & experience within the hobby would conduct himself in such a shady fashion...and I still do. I (mistakenly) gave him the benefit of the doubt.

Lesson learned. I will still continue to do first dates with a public m&g, but I will make it clear beforehand that I expect financial aspects to be
handled immediately.

Yes, well do whatever makes you feel comfortable, always. ♥

[hyperkine]

Originally Posted by Ginger Doll

Hyperkine, this gentleman's info is obscured per board policy. No one is outing anyone. By sharing his info, I'm simply trying to save others from experiencing his wrongdoings. To suggest otherwise is ludicrous. He did a horrible thing--he stole from me. If I had done the same to him, my info would also be posted as a warning to others. It's called accountability.

Well, I disagree, his name is not obscured in any meaningful sense of the word, and if this is board policy then that's a pretty sad state of affairs. He's been outed.

I feel for you, I got cashed and dashed once and reported it here. Still didn't out anyone though.

PS Things like this are why I have never and will never reveal my real-life info to any provider or third party.

[Revive]

I have given out my real name and this kind of post scares me.

[Ginger Doll]

For the sake of the argument and to help alleviate any concerns about inappropriate information sharing, I will request that a mod remove the obscured last name info. The partially masked handle will be inserted, as soon as I am 100% positive that it is the same person.

I only posted info that I truly felt was appropriate for the sake of the alert. My intention was never to vindictively "out" anyone, and if it appears that way, I sincerely apologize.

I've been a member here for several years, and I've always held myself to the highest standards of professionalism. I will continue to do so. Revive & Hyperkine--I do appreciate the constructive input. Thanks for your perspectives.

[Revive]

Thanks Ginger! That would make me feel alot better! The entire handle would not bother me! Sorry ya got screwed!

[urhuckleberry]

Further edits have been made in the redacted "name".

As a matter of interest, no one has come forth (privately) claiming to be the gentleman involved. I am not positive he is an Eccie member. If he has read this thread, he has not contacted an AR Mod.

I would welcome him to do so. As always, I hold things in confidence that are sent to me in confidence, no matter how painful that might be sometimes.

Huck

[Commander Salamander]

I will say this...Ginger, from what I could tell about your persona, your modus operandi (as gathered from your reviews), like the other top rated providers here, you strive to make this 'business' least business like. You try to inject warmth and depth into what some may consider a cold and shallow transaction. I applaud your methodology. Keep doing things your way. So what (and I don't mean that in an insensitive manner) if after 2 years and a hundred+ clients, one stiffs you? You've made the experience much more pleasant for yourself and the rest of your dates. To me, your experiences thus far bear out that the benefits FAR out weigh the risks.

I'm in sales myself. In my particular market, it is usually understood that one pays by cash. When a customer hands me the money, I don't count it in front of them, and if they offer me a check, i don't refuse them (of course I'm a pretty good read of people...knowing going in who is trustworthy and who isn't). In 5 years and hundreds of customers, I've never been short changed and have had only one check bounce (and that particular transaction was for only $20). So you see, keep on trucking your own way. I wouldn't change a thing.