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Old 02-10-2024, 04:53 AM   #1
himeros
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Location: Athens
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Default The Contest

Naughtius Maximus' Easy Money joke reminded me of a similar story.

A new fellow in town goes to a neighborhood bar and orders a drink. As the bartender is mixing the drink the fellow notices a very large jar behind the bar chock full of $5 bills. He asks the bartender, "What's the jar of money?" The bartender replies, "Oh, that's our contest. If you pass the three tests, you win the jar of money." The fellow asks, "What are the three tests?" The bartender replies, "Nope! You have to put in your $5 first." So the fellow gives him $5.

The bartender says, "Ok, first you have to drink this bottle of pepper tequila. You have to drink the whole bottle in one gulp, and you can't even make a face. Next, there's a pitbull with a bad tooth chained up out back. You have to go out there and pull that dog's tooth. Third, there's a 90 year old lady upstairs who has never been satisfied. You have to go up there and satisfy her." The fellow exclaims, "I'm not going to do that! Give me my $5 back!" The bartender tells him, "Nope, once the money's in the jar, it stays."

The fellow goes to a table and has a few (way too many) glasses of liquid courage and after a while he staggers up to the bar and says, "Where'sh that bawttle of pepper tequila?" And he drinks the whole bottle in one gulp and doesn't even make a face.

The fellow says, "Now, where'sh that dawg?" He then lurches out back and the patrons in the bar hear ferocious barking and growling and then yipping, and yelping, and whining.

The fellow staggers back into the bar and says, "Now, where'sh the ole lady with the bad tooth?"
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Old 03-27-2024, 07:21 PM   #2
pamelabell
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Default

Quote:
geometry dash scratch
Naughtius Maximus' Easy Money joke reminded me of a similar story.

A new fellow in town goes to a neighborhood bar and orders a drink. As the bartender is mixing the drink the fellow notices a very large jar behind the bar chock full of $5 bills. He asks the bartender, "What's the jar of money?" The bartender replies, "Oh, that's our contest. If you pass the three tests, you win the jar of money." The fellow asks, "What are the three tests?" The bartender replies, "Nope! You have to put in your $5 first." So the fellow gives him $5.

The bartender says, "Ok, first you have to drink this bottle of pepper tequila. You have to drink the whole bottle in one gulp, and you can't even make a face. Next, there's a pitbull with a bad tooth chained up out back. You have to go out there and pull that dog's tooth. Third, there's a 90 year old lady upstairs who has never been satisfied. You have to go up there and satisfy her." The fellow exclaims, "I'm not going to do that! Give me my $5 back!" The bartender tells him, "Nope, once the money's in the jar, it stays."

The fellow goes to a table and has a few (way too many) glasses of liquid courage and after a while he staggers up to the bar and says, "Where'sh that bawttle of pepper tequila?" And he drinks the whole bottle in one gulp and doesn't even make a face.

The fellow says, "Now, where'sh that dawg?" He then lurches out back and the patrons in the bar hear ferocious barking and growling and then yipping, and yelping, and whining.

The fellow staggers back into the bar and says, "Now, where'sh the ole lady with the bad tooth?"
Interesting story!
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Old 03-27-2024, 09:53 PM   #3
Salty Again
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... I think that joke may've already been posted here.
Just sayin'

#### Salty
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