Silly Wabbit Lingerie is for Women
This is going to be a very long post and there is no way around it and by the way it is hobby related because it does involve an escort and strippers, even though I did not pay for anything. All the names and some places and occupations have been changed to protect the guilty…I mean innocent.
It all starts out many years ago when I was married. My in-laws had my wife, (we will call her Meagan) very late in life and had her sister very young. The point is that her niece was around our age. Meagan and her whole family was German, Irish and Swedish so they were all blonde haired blue eyed and her niece, (we will call her Nikki) was part Mexican and part Indian, (The Tomahawk not the dot). She stuck out like a sore thumb in the family, but she was absolutely gorgeous, (like playmate gorgeous) and she had a body that was just incredible. The fact that she called me uncle led to many hours with my therapist in later years, but we aren’t there yet. I was obsessed with her and spent many hours thinking of her while doing naughty things. Long story short, Nikki had a huge falling out with the family and moved to NY to marry some rich guy and stopped talking to her whole family.
Flash forward many years and a divorce and this is where the story takes place. Some friends and I decided to go to NY for my birthday and party like it’s 1999…well close enough. I’m sure most of you already see where this is going, but do you really? So, sure enough I run into Nikki in NY and being as though the chances of me actually running into one person I know in a city that big are so astronomical, I decided to come clean with her and tell her that I had a huge thing for her, (it was destiny, right?). Come to find out that the feelings were mutual and she actually said that the whole taboo of it was a huge turn on. We started talking and she tells me that she isn’t married and has been doing Porn and is a high price escort. When I say high price by the way, I mean she was seeing only movie stars, rock stars politicians etc… She worked for a group that was super elite and I am thinking that there is no way this was going to end well for my wallet.
Anyway, we ended up fucking every night for the rest of the time I was there, (here’s one for you guys saying it’s all about the money) and she did not charge me a dime, well I did pay for everything else, but I was planning on blowing a lot of money anyway. I will not go into much detail besides the important thing and that is that she had a huge fetish for guys wearing lingerie, (that was a fun shopping trip by the way). I mean it really turned her on thinking about it all day then getting back to the hotel or her place and fucking like crazy. Who am I to turn down her fantasy, so I went along with it, (G-strings really suck by the way!)
So, the night of my birthday I squeezed my package into a sexy red G-string and garter belt, (yes stockings too) and we all head to the strip club. After a few hours and several Jack and Cokes I hear the DJ announce that there is a birthday boy in the crowd and he needs to get up on stage for his complimentary lap dance. I am not thinking past the three strippers on stage waiting for me and proceed to take the stage. After an incredible long song I am feeling pretty good until they announce that it is my turn to strip for the dancers…OH SHIT! I tried refusing, but was in no condition to fight off three strippers determined to get a lap dance from me, (they were abnormally strong by the way). One grabbed my shirt and off it went. Then the belt and off it went. Then the pants and I think time stopped for a full minute. I saw a few flashes and knew that could not be good at all. When time started back up I actually got a standing ovation, (well from my friends at least). The only saving grace was that Nikki was so turned on that she seriously rocked my world that night.
You would think the story is over, but alas, the humiliation does not stop there.
I worked at a Medical company at the time and most of my friends were in IT. They had this thing about people leaving their computers unlocked when they left their desks and they would fuck with them if they found any computers left unlocked. They would do stupid shit like change the language or delete all their icons in the hopes that they would lock their computers next time. Unfortunately I went to the bathroom without locking my laptop right before a big presentation. I come back and grab my laptop, go into the conference room, plug it into the projector turn it on and start handing out notes. Halfway through handing out my hand outs the entire room is filled with laughter. My dickhead friends had not only taken pictures of me onstage in lingerie, but they decided to use it as my desktop background. I never lived that down for the rest of the time I worked there and still get an email every year with that damn picture.
To add insult to injury, Nikki told her family to piss them off and it got back to Meagan and I am now also known as a niece fucker to her family as well as a cross dresser to a few friends and coworkers.
P.S. If someone out there recognizes this story PM me. That would be kind of cool to be out in the open about the hobby with friends.
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