Stalkers: A rant

[giantbourbon]

Over the last year, I’ve known of two (and probably more) very fine providers who either had to go deep UTR or retire altogether because of stalker issues. These were no BP hookers, they were Eccie VPs/ P411 ladies with great reviews and solid track records, and made a decent living “doing this.” Both delivered great GFE experiences that were sweet, sensual, and off-the charts hot. Yet in both cases, they seemed to attract some hooktard who would cyberstalk them, finding or trying to find their RL identities, showing up unannounced and unwanted at incall locations, deluging them with unwanted texts or emails, and generally making their life a living hell. These were guys who became fixated on a girl and would not take “no” for an answer. In both cases, they were “reputable” ECCIE members. I just hope they are reading this.

Life is dangerous enough for the ladies in this hobby. Unfortunately, in both cases some idiot got so hung up on a girl that the line between reality and fantasy was lost, and he wound up not only wrecking her career, but ruining things for the rest of us guys who valued these ladies and treated them with respect.

So, dude! If you find yourself trolling the internet to find out some escort’s RL identity, for whatever reason, or if you’re still trying to contact them after they’ve made it clear they want nothing to do with you, take a deep breath. Get over yourself. If you want love, go to OK Cupid or match.com. That’s not what this hobby is about. Don’t fuck it up for the rest of us.

Yes, I realize that the guys who are guilty of this are incapable of rational thought so this will fall on deaf ears. But I had to vent. It’s so damn frustrating when a great provider disappears for the wrong reasons.

Oh, and don’t bother sending me a PM asking who these ladies are. I won’t tell you.

[essayman]

A few years ago, I was having a discussion with a friend whom I consider to be a pretty wise person. We were talking about stalking, and he described it as "psychological rape."

When I asked him to further explain his comment, he cited the following: the level of intimacy involved in both rape and stalking are not warranted by the pre-existing nature of the relationship; both are non-consensual; both are about power, not love or sex. I'm sure he drew other parallels, but these are the ones I remember right now.

Interesting thoughts, huh?

On another note, whether it's hooktards doing the stalking or being stalked (yes, Virginia, the reverse DOES happen), I think we're all a bit surprised, as we would like to believe that this hobby is populated by well balanced, well developed, mature, self-actualized individuals. Uh, maybe not!!

essayman

[annie@christophers]

Wow...PERFECT answer...really...xo annie

[causewaycommuter]

GB, you started a very important thread. I hope the guys and girls with issues separating the hobby's fantasy world from reality read your post in a moment of clarity and give it some thought. But like you said, they may not capable of much rational thought and most probably don't see what they are doing as being out of line or inappropriate.

At best the person comes across as really creepy. At worst the person really scares his/her target(s) and harms them, either physically or emotionally.

[SknyDiva]

I'm glad to see gentlemen addressing this issue. I have not hade this happen but I know of these assholes. So buck up fellows and take notice to what they are saying and ladies too for that matter!! It's a fantasy!! Not real life peeps!!

[Alyssa_Dream]

This same thing keep happens to me everyday!!!

attract some hooktard (In my case there are two or three!) who would cyberstalk them (CONSTANT, even went as far as trying to hack into my accounts and emails), finding or trying to find their RL identities (They have found it and exposed it to several people), showing up unannounced and unwanted at in-call locations, deluging them with unwanted texts or emails(They get there friends to do this ALL NIGHT AND DAY), and generally making their life a living hell (YEP THEY DO THIS TOO!!).

I disabled my eccie account for a few weeks hoping that that would elevate the problem, it didn't!! It made it worse actually,(they'll send email to clients about you),they'll do whatever to knock you off course. It seems I have been running from who ever these people are for a while.. They'll hack into stuff, They've outted my REAL LIFE information to hobbyist by taking screen shots of my RL Facebook and sending that in random emails, can't catch them because they're too smart, report it but it does no good with out solid proof. I am sure I know the "who", I'll never figure out the "why" and "How"..... But it finally pissed me off enough to say go ahead, do what you whatever you do... I am too hard headed and I wasn't raised to back down from anyone, especially _***es.. I see that has happened to soo many people and they have to leave or go way UTR, and hobbyist too that have to guest their accounts.. :/... Not me, I refuse... My situation is different so I can do that, but I don't have family to worry about finding, but in most cases there are families , mother, grandmother, dads uncle and such...
My opinion they are fucking COWARDS- SCUM OF THE EARTH.. They'll never admit to it nor face it... I am assuming that's why they do it, because that's all they can do, hide behind a keyboard and make themselves feel important, then hide and run for cover.... SMDH!!

Wanted to help you rant!!!!

[giantbourbon]

Thank you, Alyssa... it's great to hear it from the ladies' point of view, and get a sense of what it's like to be victimized in that manner. And kudos to you for having the courage to stand up to those sub-human rodents. My hat's off to you. Unfortunately, the ladies to whom I was referring were both college students with RL lives to protect, and felt they had no choice but to disappear. All because of (as you put it so well) cowards on a sick power trip.

[Alyssa_Dream]

Originally Posted by giantbourbon

Thank you, Alyssa... it's great to hear it from the ladies' point of view, and get a sense of what it's like to be victimized in that manner. And kudos to you for having the courage to stand up to those sub-human rodents. My hat's off to you. Unfortunately, the ladies to whom I was referring were both college students with RL lives to protect, and felt they had no choice but to disappear. All because of (as you put it so well) cowards on a sick power trip.

The good people always leave is what I hear, leave or get ran off.... I am so sorry that happened to them. I understand their difficulties, and I hope they are doing okay or will be soon...
This is all TOO common.. Almost as if it is becoming the "Norm' and "accepted", will it ever change? When people start crossing those lines, it's not just the hobby they're affecting, they could and more than likely ARE affecting the well-being of someones child (I know mine has suffered), that persons marriage and children, SCHOOL STUDIES, Jeaopardizing someone's career or potential career etc........... HUMANITY - not a hobby rule but as a human aren't we suppose to NOT HURT OTHER PEOPLE INTENTIONALLY??? Or maybe some people didn't understand what golden rule actually meant.....
Girls get too jealousy and it's a cat fight -- then of course some gents to team up with them (One or the other girl) and it's a war or I call (Battle over P**sies!)/ Or a guy gets mad at a girl for whatever and she is HARASSED or he tries gather the troops to boycott her and sometimes BOTH / A girl gets mad at a guy for seeing someone else then tries the extortion crap, or threatens him "I will never see you again because (This is just funny) "I am allowed to fuck whoever on this board but your penis BELONGS TO ME and ONLY ME, but you better tell all your friends to see ONLY ME TOO!! YOU GAVE ME A DOLLAR SO I OWN YOUR COCK!!"(That's what I hear when I hear those stories sorry)
The list goes on and on.... and ON......
I truly feel for your friends.. I know the feeling and frustration.. :/