What Parents are Afraid, or Unwilling, to Say Today

[EXTXOILMAN]

Attachment 200574

[Old-T]

Wonderful theory. Often said by people who no longer are (or never were) teenagers.

It is not reality, and as much as all the data shows this leads to bad things in society those who already have "made it" (like a judge, for example) think speaking some platitudes will chanhe human behavior. Those words are good as far as they go, but a far cry from complete.

[Guest032516]

Originally Posted by Old-T

Wonderful theory. Often said by people who no longer are (or never were) teenagers.

It is not reality, and as much as all the data shows this leads to bad things in society those who already have "made it" (like a judge, for example) think speaking some platitudes will change human behavior. Those words are good as far as they go, but a far cry from complete.

But why wouldn't their behavior change if they did those things or their parents made them do those other things?

Implicit in their questions "What can we do? Where can we go?" is the idea that their behavior could have been changed by government or their parents if only the government or their parents provided entertain diversions.

Why does it have to be a diversion provided by others? It takes little or no money to read a book or do your homework. It is a matter of motivation - being a self-starter.

[Old-T]

That part I can agree with. But what too many adults refuse to acknowledge is that teens are not slightly smaller adults. It is an important part of those years to develop socially with their age group peers--the generation they will be part of for decades.

Yes, read and do things for the community and study hard. Those ARE all good things. But whether it a YMCA, school dances, youth sports, a skate park, or a municipal pool it is important to the natural development of society for teens to have a place to socialize with their own breed, feel out what it means to be a "grown up" without being on the coat tails of adults.

Listen between the words, it isn't so much "you need to entertain me", as it is "I need a place to feel I belong". My point was not that the judge's comments were wrong, just oversimplifying and incomplete.

[Yssup Rider]

Originally Posted by Old-T

Wonderful theory. Often said by people who no longer are (or never were) teenagers.

... Or parents!

[acp5762]

I find almost any post here can be set to a song. So lets dedicate this post to this one.


http://youtu.be/_3l2Vo1z260

[JCM800]

Originally Posted by acp5762

I find almost any post here can be set to a song. So lets dedicate this post to this one.


http://youtu.be/_3l2Vo1z260

good choice

[gnadfly]

I've never been to New Zealand and never went to a college that had a Principal. Perhaps the youth should start fucking out in a field in full view and the older people will funds some recreational facilities.

That's my Assup style post for the year.

[Yssup Rider]

Not even close, dipshit!

[Jewish Lawyer]

Originally Posted by EXTXOILMAN

Attachment 200574

Fuck yeah! Make the whiny punks earn their way like I had to do.
The kids today are the future, and the future looks bleak!

[I B Hankering]

Originally Posted by Old-T

That part I can agree with. But what too many adults refuse to acknowledge is that teens are not slightly smaller adults. It is an important part of those years to develop socially with their age group peers--the generation they will be part of for decades.

Here's some food for thought:

Trashing Teens: "The Case Against Adolescence," by Psychologist Robert Epstein

In every mammalian species, immediately upon reaching puberty, animals function as adults, often having offspring. We call our offspring "children" well past puberty. The trend started a hundred years ago and now extends childhood well into the 20s. The age at which Americans reach adulthood is increasing—30 is the new 20—and most Americans now believe a person isn't an adult until age 26.

The whole culture collaborates in artificially extending childhood, primarily through the school system and restrictions on labor. The two systems evolved together in the late 19th-century; the advocates of compulsory-education laws also pushed for child-labor laws, restricting the ways young people could work, in part to protect them from the abuses of the new factories. The juvenile justice system came into being at the same time. All of these systems isolate teens from adults, often in problematic ways. . . .

Teens in America are in touch with their peers on average 65 hours a week, compared to about four hours a week in preindustrial cultures. In this country, teens learn virtually everything they know from other teens, who are in turn highly influenced by certain aggressive industries. This makes no sense. Teens should be learning from the people [adults] they are about to become.



http://www.psychologytoday.com/artic...trashing-teens


After all, Alexander the Great ended his tutelage when he was sixteen, took control of a kingdom when he was twenty and began his world conquests when he was only twenty-two.

[Old-T]

Not going to disagree with much of that--though I do think we are different from other mamals in some significant ways so not every comparison like that holds water. I think "adulthood" occurs too late in life nowadays, but my original point was not attached to a specific age, but to whenever that transitional few years occurs.

More important, I believe, is that the various parts of the "adultization" are synchronized. As your post points out, they currently are not, and that is a problem.

I also believe the "learn from peers" and "learn from adults" both need to be part of the process or the person will be incomplete. The key is what to learn from which group, and I think we do this poorly today. 65 hrs/week is a measure of time only--not whether it is focused correctly. For some teens I suspect it is, for others it is not.

I met a young girl not long ago who decided she wanted to do something for the homeless kids she passed on her way to school each day. A couple years ago she herself had been homeless. She organized a number of her friends in her class, brought in some local businesses, then city council (I read her talk with them in the paper there, and it was outstanding), and contacted the local university to publicize it at their basketball games. Resulted in literally hundreds of pieces of cloathing that she and her friends distributed before winter.

In her case I suspect a lot of adults learned as much from her as she did from them.