Three Holy Men and a Bear
Three Holy Men and a Bear
A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to
the students of Northern Michigan University at Marquette in the Upper
Peninsula of Michigan.
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk
shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all
that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would
all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to
convert it to their religion.
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had
various bandages on his body and limbs, went first.
'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found
him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around.
So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of
God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to
give him first communion and confirmation.'
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both
legs in casts, and had an IV drip.
In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers, you
KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And
then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me.
So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP
another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him
and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as
a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus..Hallelujah!
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in
a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors
running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, ....circumcision may not
have been the best way to start."
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