Provider and Pimp Alert!

[Amillia_Winter]

Just a heads up for the gentleman and ladies here. This chick has been texting me the same message all day, I've asked her to stop and she continues to send it. I'm a little annoyed at this point. Here is the text she keeps sending:
Hi Samantha here. Ima keep it real w u str8 out the gate. Im lookin for a go getta thats ready to suit up w a terrific team & lets go get this $$ TOGETHER. Honestly, my fam is kooler than a fan! Dig this! He's got stability, backbone & is non abusive! My fam rock a respectful, safe structured, environment thats supportive with lifes important essentials: kids, dr lic, bir cert, ss, warrants, probat fees, legal biz etc. He's def proven & well balanced and will compliment u on continuing to be a productive mem of society. If ur situation is good & u happy then no disrespect. If not & u want sumn better lock me in & get at me ASAP b4 i change #s & lets see whts up. You'll be treated right & we'll make a good team. I got u!
Sounds real desperate and pathetic if you ask me.
Guys & Girls be careful!

http://dallas.backpage.com/FemaleEsc...ys-21/12275097

[OldTimeBuddie]

Well, my take is it's mostly likely not *her* that is txting you, and the *he* is too dumb to remember being blown off, given the ... level of literacy displayed.

Seriously - why would anyone see this and think "yeah, this a good idea?" "He will...compliment you?" H*ll, here ya go for free "You go, girl, great job." Let me know if you ever need more validation. On the house. cuz thas jus how i roll, a'ite? LOL. And could someone tell me just how much backbone is required to take half or more of a young lady's earnings? And yeah, I'm gonna trust my kids to a pimp to care for ... NOT! Plus DL, birth certificate and SS card, which you will surrender to him so he can be supportive with them.

Not meaning to belittle your annoyance hun, but thanks for the chuckle. I needed it.

[Toasted]

National Spelling Bee candidate ???? Only a slight mis-spell by Amellia -- But, The other - Where do our educttional $$$$ go?

[eccienewbie]

Well, the sales pitch was just too tempting for me, so I called him and now I am the newest member of the family. So, girls, the shoe is on the other foot and the money now goes in THIS direction. If I've already seen you, then no screening will be required. Just pick up the phone, drop by an ATM, and we're good to go.

Oh, now that I'm on the other side of the fence, I can't forget the disclaimer (apologies to one of my former favs for stealing her disclaimer language...come see me -- first one is free for you, baby-doll...just don't tell my new daddy):

1.This is not an illegal offer. Ad is for time and
companionship only.
2. Solicitation is a crime, therefore, explicit language is forbidden.
3. I do reserve the right to decline appointments as I deem necessary.
By contacting me (either through phone or email) you agree to these
terms and hereby agree that you are not part of any governmental
agency using this advertisement for entrapment or for detainment.
This is a contract you agree to by contacting me.

[Spice Candice]

useless information but thanks neways

[ShysterJon]

[Edited by poster.]

[mmcqtx]

Awwww hells no Eccie, yous my bottom biatch. How you gonna do me dat way after alls we done been thru? You can't be runnin' off wit no Mr. Goodpromise and WHERES MY MONEY?

[eccienewbie]

Originally Posted by mmcqtx

Awwww hells no Eccie, yous my bottom biatch. How you gonna do me dat way after alls we done been thru? You can't be runnin' off wit no Mr. Goodpromise and WHERES MY MONEY?

I'm sorry, daddy. He talked a good talk, and played some kind of Jedi mind trick on me. I'm comin' home soon as I make up the money I done costed you.


But I do have a driver's license, now.

[Chainsaw Anthropologist]

Originally Posted by Toasted

National Spelling Bee candidate ???? Only a slight mis-spell by Amellia -- But, The other - Where do our educttional $$$$ go?

Obviously they were absolutely wasted on you....
misspell ~ one word, hyphen not used
educational ~ not educttional
Kudos to the Quinlan ISD, what day do you get to wear the teeth?

[LovingKayla]

ROTFLMAO!!!

The only reason I even know what a bottom bitch is because of south park. Butter's bottom bitch is the funniest f#cking provider episode they've done.

I don't know how good it is to advertise you are now with a "manager" (pimp is such a dirty word) here on eccie. Truly good luck with that, but I sorta cringe when I read it. But hey if he's fair and treats you good, who cares what you do. Just sayin.

[eccienewbie]

Originally Posted by SoftPlaceToLand

ROTFLMAO!!!

The only reason I even know what a bottom bitch is because of south park. Butter's bottom bitch is the funniest f#cking provider episode they've done.

I don't know how good it is to advertise you are now with a "manager" (pimp is such a dirty word) here on eccie. Truly good luck with that, but I sorta cringe when I read it. But hey if he's fair and treats you good, who cares what you do. Just sayin.

The response has been phenomenal for me, so far. I highly recommend that all the guys get a manager.

[Wildstar]

Yo, yo, yo! U gots 2 luv the ebonics!

W.

[TexTushHog]

How the fuck can you even read that gibberish?

[U.R.L.]

Originally Posted by Spice Candice

useless information but thanks neways

+1

[mmcqtx]

Don't hate the player, hate the game.