Mediation

[Ginger Doll]

Honestly, Giz – I feel no need to rehash any of this drama, or defend myself further. I have always been an honest, straightforward person – and I have no reason to invent stories. And that's all I have to say about that.

I'd really rather just drop the whole thing, and concentrate on what I'm here to do – make all my male friends deliriously happy.

[MrGiz]

As I said earlier. . . I can agree with that!

BTW. . . I've heard you're perty good with females too!

[Mr.Chan]

It is inevitable that opinions on this board, and any other board dedicated to the hobby, will be strong, and occasionally feathers will be ruffled. Sometimes the pot boils over and some get into hot water.It happens. It is hardly tragic. Plane crashes and drowned children are tragic. A provider getting a short vacation from the board is not.
Hobbyists look for fun and run some risk from a legal system that does not understand what fun is. Escorts, however are engaged in a profession in which their personally safety is in jeopardy from the poorly screened or inaccurately referenced client. We may be mildly amused or irritated about something that to them is life or death. I would say that there are times when the raised voice and harsh tone is appropriate, and the ladies have a right to it. The moderators can police the aftermath, that is their business.
The trembling readers who are disturbed by a little dust up from time to time may be too fragile to play with the grown up girls. Pick another playground with seesaws that are closer to the ground.

[Chica Chaser]

Originally Posted by Ginger Doll

It's clear to me that those who can't control themselves will eventually handle the problem for us – by getting themselves removed.

Indeed Ginger.

A quick refresher of the Forum Guidelines http://www.eccie.net/announcement.php?f=5

#1 - Avoid cases of unprovoked rudeness to others. No place for it here. Yes, with the dynamic nature of the threads and topics, tempers will flare and things will become heated from time to time. You may often encounter individuals who become passionate or emotional when expressing one's opinion or point of view. That's all understood and perfectly acceptable within reason…….but, start slamming or bashing another member and be met with consequences.

#3 - Disrespect to others, IN GENERAL, will be considered an item of low tolerance, especially when posting in our coed forums. Follow the Golden Rule and treat others as you wish to be treated yourself. This applies to fellow members as well as staff. We do not require that you have respect for us, but we do require that you treat us respectfully in the public forums. If you feel the need to vent, gripe, or blow off some steam regarding a staff member's action or decision, we ask that you keep it private. Email, RTM, or the PM system would be the appropriate avenue to take in such cases. In cases where you would like to request additional clarity about a staff decision, you are free to pursue an answer in either a public forum or private means of communication. If handled publicly, post your inquiry in a respectful manner.

#4 - Blatant insults or hostility toward another member will be met with staff intervention. This applies to using our coed forums for name calling, personal attacks, or vulgar slang terms to describe fellow members. If you have legitimate concerns about another member here, share them tactfully in the appropriate private forums or with staff.

#31 - Often times in the hobby arena, members may display a tendency towards bringing their conflicts with other members to the board. This will be strongly discouraged and swift effort will be made to put it to rest. Additionally, staff will make every effort to stay uninvolved in conflicts and disputes between members off the board except in such cases where the board becomes directly affected.

[MrHappy4u]

Thanks for the reminders, Chica.

I've heard from a few members they now hesitate to post because of the "drama". The whole concept of the board is for a free exchange of information, the expression of opinions and their discussion.

I for one, believe it's good for business for a provider to particiapte, as it gives one more bit of research insite for a hobbyiest to look inside at who they will be spending time with. From the provider's viewpoint, I would think it works the same way - as one more tool in their screening toolbox.

The cloak of anonimity the internet provides gives some the idea that it's ok to say or do anything they'd never think of doing in a face to face business or social setting. It's when behind the scenes disagreements spill over onto the board that things get out of hand.

Enough said. Let's all go back to the business of pleasure and have a good time

[dearhunter]

You just need to have people skills...........like me

[boardman]

The OP made me...

[Fancyinheels]

Enlighten me, please....which of the MANY dramas on this board are we now talking about?

And Chica Chaser and MrHappy and other mods, I don't mean this to be rude or discourteous in any way, but so many rules have been broken over the last year, or bent to the point of almost cracking, so much gotten away with, that I don't see the ECCIE "constitution" as having any power whatsoever. It doesn't seem to be administered evenhandedly, but perhaps it can't be. Maybe ECCIE has grown too large to be effectively governed? I've watched incidences of unprovoked rudeness, disrespect, and blatant insults increase exponentially in the not quite 3 years I've been a member. Calling it "drama" is like calling WWII a "skirmish." The board has pretty much become a battleground, and it makes me ill. Exchanging ideas is one thing, but the continuous hurling barbs of sarcasm and derision is making us all targets who either duck or hurl bombs back. People trying to be funny and clever are just being hurtful. Mediation will just be a "war of the words," giving virulent members yet another forum for their caustic comments and intolerant retorts.

ECCIE excretes negativity. I have to say, I don't much like it here anymore. (And yeah, I know, who cares, go somewhere else, hooktard biatch.)

[Sydney Pure]

Originally Posted by Fancyinheels

Enlighten me, please....which of the MANY dramas on this board are we now talking about?

And Chica Chaser and MrHappy and other mods, I don't mean this to be rude or discourteous in any way, but so many rules have been broken over the last year, or bent to the point of almost cracking, so much gotten away with, that I don't see the ECCIE "constitution" as having any power whatsoever. It doesn't seem to be administered evenhandedly, but perhaps it can't be. Maybe ECCIE has grown too large to be effectively governed? I've watched incidences of unprovoked rudeness, disrespect, and blatant insults increase exponentially in the not quite 3 years I've been a member. Calling it "drama" is like calling WWII a "skirmish." The board has pretty much become a battleground, and it makes me ill. Exchanging ideas is one thing, but the continuous hurling barbs of sarcasm and derision is making us all targets who either duck or hurl bombs back. People trying to be funny and clever are just being hurtful. Mediation will just be a "war of the words," giving virulent members yet another forum for their caustic comments and intolerant retorts.

ECCIE excretes negativity. I have to say, I don't much like it here anymore. (And yeah, I know, who cares, go somewhere else, hooktard biatch.)

++1

Your so right!!

Every area is different and I'm beginning to NOT like it at all!!!

Ugh!!

And some people get the Royal treatment while others sit on the sideline. Makes me mad!!

I'm still waiting on my BFs name to be removed from these forums!!

And that's OLD news. Ur for months it has set there while someone else gets it removed in a matter of minutes???? What is really going on???

[boardman]

It's a fucking conspiracy...A conspiracy I tell ya!

[Adrianna xo]

Originally Posted by Fancyinheels

Enlighten me, please....which of the MANY dramas on this board are we now talking about?

And Chica Chaser and MrHappy and other mods, I don't mean this to be rude or discourteous in any way, but so many rules have been broken over the last year, or bent to the point of almost cracking, so much gotten away with, that I don't see the ECCIE "constitution" as having any power whatsoever. It doesn't seem to be administered evenhandedly, but perhaps it can't be. Maybe ECCIE has grown too large to be effectively governed? I've watched incidences of unprovoked rudeness, disrespect, and blatant insults increase exponentially in the not quite 3 years I've been a member. Calling it "drama" is like calling WWII a "skirmish." The board has pretty much become a battleground, and it makes me ill. Exchanging ideas is one thing, but the continuous hurling barbs of sarcasm and derision is making us all targets who either duck or hurl bombs back. People trying to be funny and clever are just being hurtful. Mediation will just be a "war of the words," giving virulent members yet another forum for their caustic comments and intolerant retorts.

ECCIE excretes negativity. I have to say, I don't much like it here anymore. (And yeah, I know, who cares, go somewhere else, hooktard biatch.)

AS A WISE MAN ONCE SAID, "it's not about what you know it WHO you know" I agree with you 100% on this!

[Sydney Pure]

Or maybe in this case who your F"n... Just saying!!

[Adrianna xo]

Originally Posted by Sydney Pure

Or maybe in this case who your F"n... Just saying!!

Can I get an amen!

[Sexy_Brittany]

Originally Posted by MrGiz

But there is nothing clear and definite about that whole silly little affair!
It should not have been provoked in public! *But , it was!

I know one thing that was both very clear and very definite. My personal life was marinated in lies and then set out for the public forums to feast upon like a Christmas turkey.

It would appear that the general opinion would be for us silly, childish hooktards to keep everything back channel. I think that the majority of you would be surprised to know just exactly how much goes on back channel. There comes a point when it is ridiculous that some continue to be perceived as angels while all the while they are actually the ones flaming the fires. I'm sorry that a few of you are uncomfortable with ARs recent drama.

Lets see if I can shed some light on why I'm such a drama queen. I have been receiving sporadic, harassing phone calls from the same pimp daddy for 4 months. In light of recent events, the calls have increased. I do not accept blocked calls but he gets creative and calls from different numbers. The calls are usually an update on his latest addition and an invitation to join the ranks. After I decline he will advise me to "be careful who I accept for references because pimps can have references too and he would love to get me alone." I've contacted 3 VERY WELL KNOWN providers questioning their association with this guy. Only one responded. Well, actually, another provider in question DID respond. With threats of physical violence. Since when is uncooperative, combative behavior and threats to another's safety condoned?

There is a fine line between what is or is not personal. Considering it was hobby related and the issue directly affects the clients I see and the references I accept then I can justify the issue being addressed in open forum. One of the things I love most about Eccie is the camaraderie. We are all a team and we are all held accountable for our behaviors. Not everyone will do the right thing when no one else is looking. Some will not cooperate until addressed by the masses. I am one person, with one opinion. Who cares if I'm upset by a few threats. It was assumed that I could be spoken to and treated in a disrespectful manner because I would keep the drama back channel and therefore it would pose no potential threat anyone's "spotless" reputation. Being held accountable for your actions is what keeps the animals in line. Screening, TCB, BCD, are all important. The communication between providers and their peers is also important. All these suggestions of reporting it to the mods are ridiculous in relation to the topic at hand. I have spoken at length with the moderators but their hobby influence begins and ends with Eccie. They can only interfere if pimp daddy sends a PM saying, "I'm gonna getcha!" Otherwise, what can they do? Go grab an insulant provider and make her stand in a corner until she can play well with others?! So if the antagonizers do not use Eccie as a vessel to deliver the threats then are they irrelevant in hobby world?

Is this my cross to bear because of my chosen profession? Should I have kept my issues to myself because some of you are uncomfortable with confrontation? So, because DRAMA is frowned upon, certain hobby members are given a green light to behave however they choose without fear of being held accountable by the public eye? I would really like to know.

Example -- Over the last week I have received numerous harassing PMs from a well know board member. The most recent calling me a white trash whore. The issue is being addressed back channel so no one will know except the mods, myself, and the offender. He will continue to be treated cordially on the boards and no one will be made "uncomfortable" by his comments. Well, no one except me.

Originally Posted by Sydney Pure

I'm still waiting on my BFs name to be removed from these forums!!

And that's OLD news. Ur for months it has set there while someone else gets it removed in a matter of minutes???? What is really going on???

Did you RTM, Syd? I sent several PMs and used all other forms of communication possible to reach the mods so that the info could be removed quickly. I don't think anyone turned a blind eye to your plight; I just think maybe it was drowned out by the other drama in the thread and therefore forgotten. I can't imagine the moderators not addressing the issue had you brought it to their attention. Outing is a serious offense and should be handled as such. I have a feeling that had the "victim" posted the name of a client's wife, then she would have exiled from the community and forever blackballed in the AR forum. Conveniently, she only posted the name of someone I'm dating and since I'm just a drama-ridden little Arkansas hooker then its no big deal. Isn't that what you are implying, Mr. Giz? Are you disgusted that a provider was held accountable for her actions? I was issued points in the matter also. Had I posted someone's personal information do you think the consequences would have been different?

[Ginger Doll]

I completely concur with Brittany. Despite the fact that no one wants to hear about hooktard drama, there are problems occuring back channel that affect our ability to hobby---and these problems directly & detrimentally affect hobbyists, too.

If I can't get a reference because someone is playing games with me...then I can't see YOU. And that's pretty fucked up. I wouldn't do that sort of thing to anyone else...why should I tolerate it? It would be nice if y'all would recognize what's really important here.

Perhaps we handled it improperly by challenging the culprit. Perhaps. No one is perfect. I was frustrated with the situation and the person responsible for it. I addressed it. I don't think I need to apologize for having a brain or a spine.

Maybe y'all would have preferred we just layed out the facts? But I wonder...would the reception have been any different? The end result? I honestly doubt it.

I'm open to hearing the opinions of the general consensus... How would y'all have preferred that we handled it?