Lion Tamer

[midwestman]

A circus owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two people show up.

One is a retired golfer in his late-sixties and the other is a gorgeous brunette in her mid-twenties.

The circus owner tells them, "I'm not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you two had better be good or you're history.

Here's your equipment -- chair, whip and a gun. Who wants to try out first?"

The gorgeous brunette says, "I'll go first". She walks past the chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the lion's cage.

The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her. As he gets close, the gorgeous brunette throws open her coat revealing her beautiful naked body.

The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her feet and ankles. He continues to lick and kiss her entire body for several minutes and then rests his head at her feet.

The circus owner's jaw is on the floor. He says, "I've never seen a display like that in my life."

He then turns to the retired golfer and asks, "Can you top that?"

The tough old golfer replies, "No problem, just get that lion out of there."

[slocum]

Reminds me of a joke from my childhood that went something like this. A king had a beautiful highly sought-after daughter. One day a suitor comes to the castle to ask the king for his daughter's hand in marriage. The king tells him that he has to perform two tasks. In most jokes there are three, but in this one it's just two. The king points to two tents and tells the young man that in one tent is a ferocious lion that he has to kill. In the second is his fourth wife who has never been sexually satisfied, and he must satisfy her.

The young lad enters the first tent and there is much snarling and roaring and finally silence. The young lad emerges with his clothes torn and asks, "OK, where is the ferocious wife I have to kill?"